The Battle
by blonde gone wild
Summary: Spencer leaves LA and goes back home, leaving everything she knows back west. But what happens when it just follows her the 2000 miles? Can Ashley win her best friends heart before she makes the biggest mistake of her life knowingly? Read and find out.
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: **belongs to Tom**

**Rating: **M to be safe

**Summary: **_A tear slowly runs down her cheek as she stands there holding onto her bouquet of flowers as she painfully watches her two best friends seal their love with a kiss_.

**Chapter one:**

It was the spring of 1990 in the fourth grade when a little blue eyed blonde girl transferred from being a country girl to a city girl. Her mom passed away when she was born and she kind of always blamed herself for her mothers death and leaving her father to raise her and her two older brothers all by himself. He's done an okay job but it's difficult to spend all that quality time when he's hardly ever home because his boss always sends him to Sunny California on business trips. So she's been practically raised by her oldest brother, Clay, since she was five.

Ten years before the blonde was born, her mother always wanted to adopt a kid from Africa and her father wanted her to be happy so they hopped on a plane and flew out to Kenya and they just fell in love with this baby boy who's mother also passed away during birth. His father died of malnutrition six weeks after Clay was born. So the Carlin's signed the papers and Clay was their first child. They had planned on telling him about his parents when he was old enough to understand the meaning behind life and death or whenever he asks why he's so different than his new family. They were also given a photograph of his parents shortly before he was born and they kept it safely to give to Clay the first night he asked why he was a different color than the Carlin's; Paula and Arthur.

Clay was there for everything Arthur couldn't make for his younger siblings. It was in his nature to take care of others. To give and not worry about receiving. He was well liked by everyone around him. So on that first day that the Carlin's moved to Sunny California from Little Rock, Arkansas, Clay was there to say goodbye and good luck to his youngest sister, Spencer. He brought her into a giant reassuring hug at the front doors of her new school, King Elementary as their other brother, Glen, stood there watching the two, waiting to walk over to the Jr. High with Clay.

Glen was the middle child and the last boy which meant he would never get spoiled like his youngest sister and he wouldn't ever get anything new, only the hammy down's from his oldest brother, Clay. When their father was home, he would always fight for his attention, usually succeeding. He would do anything for attention, whether it hurt others or not, he craved to be in the center. When their mother was alive for those short seven years, he never had to worry about fighting for attention. But when Spencer came, he slowly but surely started to always feel out of place.

Spencer let go of Clay, her biggest comfort and looked over at Glen, "Good luck today, Spence. You'll do fine. We'll be right out here waiting for you at 3." She looks back over at Clay who spoke sincerely to her.

She smiled goodbye and watched as her brothers walked down the front steps and through the parking lot and started down the street towards the Jr. High. She took a deep breath and closed her eyes and she turned around. She slowly let out the breath and slowly opened her eyes and looked through the open door and saw kids running down the hallway and then disappear behind the corner. She was completely terrified of meeting new people, she didn't know what to expect. The only thing she did know was that she had to walk through these doors and make her way to the principles office. Where was that? She had no idea.

She stumbled into room after room, being let down by each of them. She had no idea which direction she had to go. She read the numbers above the doors, 101, 102, 103, Library, Restrooms, 104, 105, 106. Wall. She was defeated by the giant building she wasn't used too. Her other school had a total of 300 students… this school was doubled it looked like so far. So she hung her head and sighed and turned around to start looking for the office the other way but bumped into a raven haired boy. "Oh sorry." She spit out quickly.

He laughed and stared at her amused, "You new here?" And she nodded, "Yeah I could tell by the accent." She smiled shyly, "You looked a little lost.."

She looked at him now instead of the ground, maybe he could help her. She nodded, "Yeah… im uh.. Im looking for the office."

He laughs again and puts his arm around her shoulders and turned them both around and started walking down the hallway, "You missed it as soon as you walked in, it was on your… right." He smiled over at the blonde but it fell as she shook his arm off of her.

He walked her to the office and there they stood, she smiled at him and thanked him and he nodded and watched her until the office door shut. He couldn't believe how adorable the new girl was. Her southern accent just made him crazy. He shook his head and he just had to tell his best friend, Ashley.

He walked down the hallway that he had just walked with the blonde and he walked into room 106 and spotted the brunette sitting at her desk playing on a gaming device. He walked over and hopped up on her desk and she didn't take her eyes off of her game, "What Aiden?" and he just sat there, waiting for her to look at him to tell her all about the new girl. He thought about just taking the game boy out of her hands, but she could beat him up, she he decided against the idea. She finally looked up, "What's with the stupid smile?" She looked at him disgusted.

His eyes beamed with joy, "You won't believe it. There was this blonde girl, so cute, and she was this southern accent. We bumped in-" And everyone became quiet as the Principle of the elementary walked through the door of 106. Ashley quickly hid her game boy inside of her desk and Aiden quickly jumped up off the desk.

"Class? This is Spencer Carlin," The blue eyed blonde girl walked in through the door now and appeared by the side of Principle Carey, "She's a new student and will be joining your class. So please welcome her and make her feel like she belongs." Principle Carey exit's the room, leaving Spencer standing there, completely filled with embarrassment. She fidgeted with the hem of her shirt and her eyes darted across all of the students in the room and finally landed on the raven boy.

"That's her." He whispered to Ashley and she too was in complete awe.

**So let me know if I should continue? **


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2:**

Spencer, Clay, and Glen all sat around the kitchen table eating their fathers famous pasta. It was their mothers favorite dish that he could cook. They didn't have it very often because of that, but when pasta night came around, everyone loved and ate every single noodle and meatball. Arthur was the best cook around, hands down, everyone agreed. He always cooked at Thanksgiving, Paula would just ruin the turkey. At Christmas he made the most delicious mouth watering ham. School lunches were even amazing. Some people couldn't believe that he became a consoler for the troubled instead of a cook and own his own restaurant.

Arthur was always good with conversations and with giving advice; it had always been in his nature. He helps teens from being abused to drug abuse to bulimia. He's just an all around good guy. "How was the first day of school?" He asks all three of his children before taking a drink of water.

All three stayed quiet for a moment before Clay spoke up first, "It was good, I like it here and all of my classes. Everyone accepts me more I feel like they ever did back in Little Rock." Clay too always spoke good from the heart.

Before Arthur could speak, Glen spoke, "It was awesome! There are so many hot chicks here and I didn't miss basketball tryouts." He quickly took a bite of his dinner, "Oh which reminds me, I need to get a physical by the end of the week, Pops." He finished and continued to stuff his face.

"Glen slow down, there's plenty of food." Arthur said sternly and looked over at his only daughter, "What about you, Spencer? Did you make any friends?" And he only got a shrug for a response. "What happened?" He set his fork down and waited patiently for his daughter to tell him about her day.

Spencer sighed and continued to play with her food as she explained her day without taking a breath in-between her story, "Well I got lost, the school is huge. There's this girl in my class who is a complete jerk and all the guys here think that they're all that. There was only like, two kids who even acknowledged my presence. They're alright I guess. I sat with them at lunch and it was really awkward, the guy I think his name was Aiden or something wouldn't stop looking at me. The girl is cool though, I never got her name but apparently she's the daughter of some famous rock star, go figure." She finished and took a deep breath and continued to stare at her food.

All three guys all looked at her, "What's his name? I'll kill him." Glen said in a protective tone.

"Glen." Arthur said quickly. "Well it'll be better tomorrow, sweetheart, I promise." And with that, everyone finished their dinners and got ready for bed. It was a late night at the house for the Carlin's. Glen and Clay loved it here, but Spencer, she really missed it back home. For her, you can take the girl out of the country, but you can not ever take the country out of the girl. It's just simply impossible for the blue eyed blonde.

A couple of months passed and Spring break came around, a whole week off from school. The Carlin kids just couldn't wait, except this year, there won't be no annual camping trip because Glen has a basketball tournament that last all week. As for Spencer and Clay? They're either stuck at home or at Glen's games and neither one of them want to spend their week off at school.

Clay rolled off of the couch when a knock came from the door and looked at Spencer who sat in the recliner by the window reading a book, "I'll get it." And he walked by her and he got a smile out of her by the way he said it. When he opened the door, there stood a ten year old brunette girl asking for Spencer, "Hey Spence, it's for you." He called, "You can come in, she's in the living room." He moved aside for the girl to walk in and closed the door after her.

Spencer came running around the corner and stopped when she saw who it was, "Hey Ashley, what're you doing here?" She looked over at Clay and gave him the you-can-leave-now look and he laughed and walked back into the living room and replanted himself on the couch and continued to watch tv.

"I was bored, wanted to know if you wanted to go do something. I lost your number or I would have called first. Aiden won't be there." She stood there in the entry way and watched Spencer's eye smile which made her smile.

Spencer never once hung out with Ashley without her sidekick, Aiden and she was excited that it would finally be just the two girls, "Of course. We could go swimming, it's hot today." And then it was Spencer's turn to smile as she watched her friends brown eyes smile because she was actually excited that Spencer didn't care if Aiden was here or not, she wanted to actually hang out with just her.

The two girls ran upstairs and got changed to go swimming in Spencer's backyard where there was a pool. That's what all three kids demanded to have if they had to move two thousand miles away. Arthur agreed to get a house that had a pool because he was moving all of his kids in the middle of school to a whole new state and community. It was the least he could do.

The girls spent hours swimming and tanning in the lawn chairs up on the deck. They drank pink lemonade and talked for a couple more hours before Ashley's mom was calling asking where her daughter was. Both girls didn't want the day to end, they were having the most fun either of them have had in a long time. So Ashley begged her mom, Christine, to let her stay the night at Spencer's that night, which wasn't hard since she wasn't ever home. Christine would much rather have her daughter stay at the Carlin's any day than stay at home alone in such a big house with only the maid in the house who didn't speak one piece of English.

That night Ashley got to experience what a family dinner was, all that was missing was a mother figure, which neither girl had. She enjoyed having all of the company around the table instead of finding something out of the pantry and going up to her room and sitting on her bed eating something that was microwaved. She hadn't had a home cooked meal in years, not since her father left. "This is a wonderful meal, Mr. Carlin, thanks." She happily ate the delicious cheeseburger straight from the grill outside.

Spencer smiled to herself as she ate her favorite meal next to her new best friend. She could feel that they were going to be best friends for a really long time and that was something that made her happy. She didn't expect to find someone like Ashley when she moved out to California. She felt kind of bad for replacing her first best friend back home in Little Rock. But with just spending all of this time with Ashley today, she could feel that they were already closer than Spencer and Morgan were ever.

Ashley and Spencer laid in her room that night still talking about everything when Ashley started to get personal, "Can I ask you something?" Spencer looked over at her and nodded. Ashley focused on the picture on Spencer's nightstand of a pregnant blonde lady, "Who is that?" Spencer followed her gaze and landed on the photo.

She was quiet for what seemed like forever, "That's uh… that's my mom." She didn't look back over at Ashley. Talking about her mom made her emotional and uncomfortable because she never knew her. Her mom never even got to hold her in her arms after she was born, she was gone by then.

"Where'd she go?" Ashley asked in a quiet voice, knowing that she shouldn't have ever asked who was in the picture with her. She could tell that Spencer was getting really emotional on her and she didn't know how to handle that. Honestly it just freaked her out when people got emotional.

Spencer took a deep breath and let it out slowly, "She died when I was born. I never got to meet her." She stared up at the ceiling, she wouldn't dare look at Ashley.

Ashley laid there, looking at Spencer. She wished she would have never asked. She put a hand on Spencer's arm then and squeezed it a little and never said anything which made Spencer look over at her and she smiled. She didn't know why she was smiling, but something about Ashley made her smile, even when she was emotional. But she liked it.


	3. Chapter 3

Five years ago, the Carlin's packed up and moved over thousand miles from Little Rock to Los Angeles because of Arthur's job. They weren't expecting to fit right in so quickly. But today is a special day for each one of the Carlin's. It must be something in the air that is just making it perfect for everyone. Today is the day that Glen graduates from Trade-School and is a certified mechanic. He graduated with honors, blew everyone's mind. Arthur was so proud of his son who finally decided to grow up and realize that they are better people out in the world who can play basketball ten times better than he can and find a career that he could fall back on.

The 20 year old walked down off of the stage, smiling big and holding up his diploma. He himself couldn't even believe he finished top in his class. He already had job offers by the end of the graduation. Today was just supposed to be about him, but the other Carlin boy popped the question with his girl, Chelsea, of three years. Glen didn't mind much with sharing the spot light today, because today, was a special day. Today was also Paula's birthday. And today, no one was sad for the first time. No one but Spencer.

Spencer sat in her chair at a fancy restaurant in between her two best friends. Arthur just insisted that they both come and celebrate such a wonderful day. But if it's so wonderful, then why can't Spencer stop forcing her smile? She sits back in her seat and listens to everyone around her making conversation. She looks down at her father who is sitting at the head of the table and he looks so happy. Like he doesn't even realize what today is. She looks over at Glen, his arm around a girl he's been dating for the past six months. She believes her name is Madison but she never really listens when she talks. Spencer doesn't really like her much, she's too full of herself. She's perfect for her brother. Spencer watches Clay and Chelsea for a moment and can tell that he's the happiest he's ever been. There's no doubt he doesn't love her and she's so extremely happy for the both of them.

And then Spencer looks at Aiden who is talking to Glen about how the Laker's are going to kick the Celtic's and she can't stand how much he gets into it. Unlike Glen, Aiden actually is good at basketball. He's only a freshman and he's way better than Glen ever was. But something about him tugs at her but she can't figure it out. She thinks that it has to be his sense of humor, or even his sweet and kind personality. But it feels like something is missing.

That's when she looks over at Ashley Davies who is just sitting there like Spencer, taking everything in. Spencer can't help but notice then, how her beautiful brown hair frames her face perfectly or how her chocolate brown eyes smile when she smiles. She couldn't help but notice how her nose crinkles when she laughs and how when she doesn't have anything to say she fidgets with the hem of her shirt. And she couldn't help but notice when Ashley looks at her, Spencer's heart races and she can't but smile. One that isn't forced.

Spencer also can't help but notice how sweet and tender her best friends raspy voice is when she speaks, "Spence?" And Spencer shakes her head and couldn't believe she didn't hear a single word that was just said to her. Ashley laughs and playfully hits her on the arm, "You didn't hear a single word I just said to you did you?" Spencer shakes her head shyly, "Well I was telling you that your arm?" She points down to Spencer's arm and they both start laughing, "Has been laying in ketchup for the past ten minutes." Ashley picks up her napkin and takes Spencer's arm in her hand to clean her up and for Spencer, her entire world stops. But what Spencer doesn't know is that Ashley's world completely stopped spinning as well and her heart is racing that she's scared that Spencer is going to hear it.

After Ashley finished cleaning up the ketchup off of Spencer's arm, she doesn't let go of her arm, they just sit there, staring at each other. "Ashley?" And she drops Spencer's arm back onto her lap and she looks over at Aiden, "You ready to order?" And everyone looks at her and then over at the waitress and she shyly laughs and orders.

Spencer couldn't help but notice how adorable her laugh was and how she knew she wasn't going to be able to get it out of her mind all night. "You know what I think is really cute about you?" Spencer looks over at Aiden who is whispering, "Your southern accent." And he smiles brightly and Spencer forces a smile.

"Thanks." She replies and looks away quickly.

"Want to know what else I love?" She looks back over at him and before he could say, Ashley cleared her throat rather loud and announced she had to pee which made Spencer giggle.

"I'll join you." And Ashley smiled.

In the bathroom Ashley went straight to the mirror which confused Spencer, "Don't people usually pee before checking themselves out in the mirror?" She laughs a little when Ashley gives her a funny look through the mirror.

"I don't really have to pee, I just didn't want to sit through Aiden's bullshit." She smiles at Spencer through the mirror which makes Spencer smile from ear to ear and starts to blush so she quickly goes into one of the stalls before Ashley could notice.

"He's been saying that about my accent or whatever since I met him." Spencer flushes and walks over to the sink and washes her hands. Ashley narrows her eyes on Spencer through the mirror even though they're standing right next to each other. "I don't get why." She laughs at herself and dries her hands.

"Well it's a southern accent. It's fucking adorable. I wish I had some accent." Ashley and the blonde walk over to the bathroom door. "I mean, if I did? I'd be hella cute."

Spencer rolls her eyes, "You're crazy and who says 'hella'? It's stupid." And Ashley smiles at the way Spencer says some of her words.

Later that evening, Ashley and Spencer sat on Aiden's bed while he sat on the floor up against his bed, all three of them talking about absolutely nothing when Ashley piped up, "Dude, it's a Friday night and we're just sitting here. What the fuck?" Sometimes Ashley's constant cursing bothered Spencer, but she didn't know why it got to her so much. "I heard about this club called Ego. We're hot enough we could get in."

Aiden looked at her, "And if we don't get in?" He raises his eye brow, knowing that his best friend always has a solution to everything.

She smiles, "I tell 'em im Ralph Davie's daughter." She says it like she's used it before when she didn't get her way.

"Im so down." Aiden jumped up off the floor and looked at the two girls on his bed.

"Im down." Ashley looks over at Spencer who doesn't really feel like going to some club but she knows that if she doesn't agree on going, then she's going to be the party pooper so she agrees and off to Ego they went.

They got into Ego with no problem because of such a low cut shirt Ashley was wearing and part of her thong was showing if she turned a certain way. Once they were in the club, Ashley turned and looked at her two best friends, "Drinks shall we?" And she smiled and this is a side Spencer had never seen of her.

She flirts with the bartender and got three free long islands which made Spencer unusually jealous and she wasn't the jealous type when it came to people which worried her. "I don't know about you guys, but I feel like dancing before I start drinking." Aiden admitted and grabbed Spencer's hand and started to drag her out onto the dance floor. As they made their way to the dance floor, Ashley and her made eye contact and she could tell Ashley was jealous but she didn't understand why. So Spencer started dancing with Aiden and then quickly it turned to a slow song and Spencer froze, "Um…" She didn't know what to do especially when Aiden put his hands on her hips.

"It's just slow dancing, Spence, it's okay." Aiden smiled and pulled her closer to him and she looked around quickly for Ashley to save her but she was no where to be found. She put her arms around Aiden's neck and laid her head on his chest and closed her eyes. She didn't feel comfortable dancing with Aiden like this. Maybe it was because he was one of her best friends. Or maybe it was because he had such strong feelings for her and she couldn't return them. Whatever it was, she wasn't comfortable with it. She had to get away from it.

"Im sorry." And she pulled away from the raven haired boy and walked through the crowd of people as she was wondering to herself why they played a slow song at a club. She had no idea where Ashley was either she couldn't find her anywhere. Spencer made her way over to the bar where the bartender that Ashley flirted with earlier offered her a shot, assuming she was over twenty one. "I don't drink." She admitted as she sat down on the bar stool.

"Looks like you could use one." He pushed the shot closer to her, "Come on, it's on the house." He smiled slyly to her and Spencer knew that if she took the shot, he'd shut up. So she did and she swallowed every drop and made the funniest face the bartender had ever seen. "Here wash it down with another." And he brought out the same bottle and poured her another shot. "Plus, looks like you're having a rough day. We all are." And he points down the bar to four other people who are drinking.

"I better not." She pushes the shot back towards him and looks around for Ashley.

"You looking for that other girl that was with you when you got here?" And Spencer nodded, "Right. Well I saw her go into the bathroom with some red head." And he laughs and shook his head, "Can't believe I fell for that one." He looks at Spencer who is looking back at him clearly confused, "You sure you don't want this shot?" And Spencer looks down at the glass and nods, she already doesn't feel too good from the first one. "Alright, well it's here when you want it." And he downs her shot like it was nothing and winks at the blonde which makes her get up and make her way over to the restrooms.

Spencer took in a deep breath knowing that she'd probably interrupt her and some guy. And she knew that Ashley would be mad because she's finally going to get something and Spencer is going to interrupt her, knowingly. But a part of her wants to interrupt and she doesn't understand why. So she opens the door and walks into the girls restroom to look at what she looks like so far for the night. With all the hot lights and all the people dancing.

She walks into the room and stops in the door way when she sees Ashley and the red head who is defiantly not a guy. Her mouth drops and Ashley opens her eyes and looks at Spencer who is clearly hurt. Ashley pushes the red head off of her who is pushing her into the wall, "Spencer…" And Spencer doesn't know what to do. If she should leave or stay. She's frozen in that spot.


	4. Chapter 4

Even though Spencer knew that her best friend was gay, she wouldn't, she couldn't tell her that she was gay as well. So many different things could go wrong. Ashley could hate Spencer because Spencer likes her. Ashley could get really freaked out cause they're best friends. So many different things, it's too risky to chance Spencer thought. It was better this way, Ashley never knowing that she had a little school girl crush on her. It was better if Ashley just slept around with random women and Spencer would just go out with Aiden. It's just a lot simpler that way, simple for everyone especially the blue eyed blonde.

So the two girls stayed up the entire night talking about what happened earlier in the bathroom. Spencer would ask questions, knowing that she would get jealous but she was good at hiding her feelings so it was okay. Ashley would answer her best friends' questions, knowing that it hurt her but she would never admit it to Spencer, so she hid the guilt and the pain and continued on answering the curious blondes' questions.

The two girls were really quiet for a short moment of time as they sat on Spencer's bed, "so…" Ashley looked at her best friend, a little nervous that Spencer would hate her guts now that she knew she was gay, "What's it like?" Ashley looked at her questionably, "I mean… kissing a girl…" Spencer didn't look at Ashley; she kept her focus on her comforter.

Ashley sat there for a second debating on how she should answer the question, "Um… well, I can't really explain it much, Spence." And those blue eyes that Ashley falls into every time she looks in them quickly look up at her, "I mean… it's just hard. Girls are a lot better of a kisser that's fer sure." The girls shared laughter and the blonde couldn't help but thinking of how bad she wanted to try kissing a girl. Try kissing Ashley, but she'll never tell her. "You don't care that im gay… right, Spencer?" Ashley finally asked with a shaky voice.

Spencer looked at the brunette and just smiled at her, "Not one bit." She hugged her best friend then and breathed in, "You're still my best friend." She took in the smell of the brunette and she closed her eyes. She could stay in this position forever but she knew she shouldn't so she pulled away, "Just don't go falling in love with me." Spencer said with a light, nervous laugh.

Ashley smiled but thought to herself that it would be the hardest thing not to do in her entire life, "Okay I'll try." She laughed nervously along with the blonde. She knew that she would never succeed Spencer's wishes, which disappointed her and made her sad but she couldn't let the blonde see that.

Spencer's blue eyes stared into Ashley's brown eyes and she herself was sad, because that's all she wanted Ashley to do. Was fall in love with her, change her life, make her 100 percent happy again. Make her the girl of her dreams come true. Ashley noticed the sadness in those blue eyes, but decided against the fact to ask about it. She shouldn't know Spencer that way to see what she's truly feeling on the inside through her eyes. So instead, she insisted on getting some sleep, and Spencer couldn't ever object to sleeping next to this beauty.

Years would pass and Ashley would sleep with girls, keeping them only for a two week period. If the girl was good enough, she'd keep her around for a good month or so. She never did commit fully to anyone and she never could keep to Spencer's request on not falling in love with her. It was simply impossible for the brunette to do. But Ashley knew that Spencer and she wouldn't ever have a chance and she was 19, she had her GED, and she was becoming famous quick with the gift of her voice. She dropped out shortly after her junior year started, the same year Aiden and Spencer would start going out. But they would never know the real reason to why she dropped out. She needed to find someone she could call her own and run to whenever, but whenever she thought about that, Spencer's face would race to her mind.

This was senior year for Aiden and Spencer, the happiest day for the couple and one of the worst ones for the famous trio. Ashley sat next to Arthur, Clay, Chelsea, Glen, and Madison as she waited to watch her entire class walk across the stage that she should have been walking across this very day, but she couldn't handle seeing Aiden and Spencer always kissing and being cute. They all sat there for what seemed like forever before the students would walk across the stage. And finally it was Spencer's turn to walk and Ashley watched her proudly from the stands. She finished highschool with being top in her class. She was valedictorian and she gave her speech to over 3000 people and Ashley sat there smiling knowing how long she worked on that speech. Ashley heard it over hundred times, helping Spencer write it and revise it. They stayed up late for so many nights, but neither one of them cared.

After the ceremony was done, everybody met in the quad and Ashley looked around the quad for both Aiden and Spencer and she couldn't find either of them. Her vision then went completely black and she gasped at the coldness of a pair of hands that were covering her eyes, "Guess who?!" The blonde tried desperately to disguise her voice but failed miserably.

Ashley laughed, "Umm… Santa Clause?" And she heard the blonde gasp and takes her hands away, her mouth opened in shock.

"Are you calling me fat?" And they both laughed and Ashley hugged Spencer tightly, "I wish you were up there to walk with me." Spencer quietly admitted to the brunette as they pulled away.

Ashley just smiled and nodded and gave her best friend another hug, "Im proud of you Spencey, your speech was amazing." Spencer started to blush, it meant a lot to her to hear Ashley say those things to her. But all she could do was thank her before everyone else got their hugs in before they all went to dinner to celebrate.

At dinner, everyone had an amazing time. But every time someone would bring up the topic of college, Spencer would some how find a way to change the subject quickly without anyone hardly noticing it. But Ashley realized then, that Spencer never told her or Aiden where she planned on going to college. "Spencer." Ashley said to the blonde who sat next to her, closer than she should be. Spencer turned her head and smiled brightly, she was happy. She raised her eyebrows, "Never mind. I forgot." Spencer laughed and playfully nudged Ashley and continued on listening to what Clay was saying about his first year of being the youngest successful heart surgeon.

Aiden kicked Ashley from underneath the table and she glared at the raven boy, "Come outside with me real quick." And Aiden was about to get up but Ashley told him no, "What? Come on Ash, it's important." He quickly looked over at Spencer and then back at Ashley and she knew that he wanted to talk to her about his girlfriend. He couldn't go ten minutes without mentioning her name. And she knew how that felt. So she rolled her eyes and agreed to go outside but told him that she wasn't going to stand out here for a long time, she was hungry.

Spencer watched her two best friends walk outside of the restaurant and wondered to herself why she wasn't invited to go. But her eyes weren't on her boyfriend; they were on the brunette girl who was listening to him. She couldn't help but watch her and smile every time Ashley would smile. And then Ashley looked in through the windows and caught Spencer looking at her and they both smiled and turned away with a little shade of pink on their cheeks.

Aiden pulled out a little black box out from his jacket pocket and Ashley's mouth dropped, "Aiden!" And he laughed, "You know im gay. Why waste the money on a ring for me?" And he shook his head typical of his best friend.

"Ash you're so conceited." And she smiled proudly, "This is actually for her." And Ashley's face became very serious, "I was thinking of doing it after dinner. Take her to the beach and-"

Ashley cut him off quickly, "Aiden… what the hell are you doing? You don't even know where she's going to college. You can't ask her to marry you. Plus, she's only 18." And the raven haired boy just stared at Ashley with a disappointed look.

"It's a promise ring, Ash. And you're supposed to be supporting me with this, not freaking out." He shook his head and opened the box up to a gorgeous expensive diamond ring. "Im promising her that we're going to get married some day because she's the girl I want to spend the rest of my life with. When you find that perfect person so young, you can't let that kind of love go." He smiled his famous cocky smile. And as much as Ashley hated to admit it, Aiden was right. She couldn't let Spencer go because she too could only see her with Spencer when she's old and wrinkly.

The doors to the restaurant then flew open and Spencer stopped dead in her tracks, "Why wasn't I in on this little secret that you two are getting married?" She stood with her hands on her hips and Aiden quickly tried to hide the ring but the entire box fell out of his hands and the ring fell out as well. She tried to keep her laughter to herself but it spread and Ashley started to laugh. "Can I be the braids maid, oh dearest Ashley?"

And without thinking, Ashley let it slip, "I should be asking you that question." Aiden looked at her from the ground where he searched for the ring that he bought earlier that day for Spencer.

The blonde stood there in silence, "…What?"

"Ashley!" Aiden stood up, "You always ruin everything good!"

Ashley stood there and rolled her eyes, she knew it was an accident, "Aiden… stop. She doesn't ruin everything good. She puts the good in everything." And Ashley stood next to her best friend and just smiled at Aiden. "And why do you have a ring? You know im leaving for college." Spencer crossed her arms and watched as her boyfriend cleans the ring off from all of the dirt that it fell in.

Ashley quickly looked over at Spencer, "What!?" She exclaimed and Spencer sighed and looked at Ashley with sadness in her eyes and voice.

"Im sorry Ashley… I've been meaning to tell you since March… It was the hardest decision of my life basically," She chuckled and she saw that Ashley was devastated, she felt so bad, "Im sorry… I don't have to go; I can stay and go to one of the colleges here."

"Wow you offer her that when you didn't even offer your boyfriend that?" Aiden said slightly pissed off.

"Aiden." Both Ashley and Spencer said at the same time which made them smile, "Spenceee, I wish you would have told me sooner. Where are you even going?" She fidgeted with the hem of her shirt, not wanting to know the answer.

Spencer looked down at the ground, knowing that Ashley would be even more devastated with her answer, "Back to Arkansas." And Ashley didn't say anything, she just nodded. She was clearly hurt and she didn't care if she saw that she was hurt. "You'll still have Aiden though! He's just going to UCLA to play basketball." Spencer looked over at her boy, "Wish he would major in something though for a backup." She seemed uneasy with the whole topic.

"Spence, you know im going to make it in the NBA and I'll support us and you'll never have to work." Aiden slung his arm around his girlfriend and she shook him off.

"Aiden I want to work. That's why im going back south so I can really focus on my studies and not be so damn distracted." She looked over at Ashley quickly hoping that no one would notice it.

All three friends looked at one another in complete silence when Glen opened the door, "Foods here come eat."

"Finally!" Ashley said excited because she was starving and she wanted to get away from her two best friends who were making everything awkward and she was only going to get hurt.

Spencer turned to go into the restaurant but Aiden grabbed her arm, "I was going to wait to do this after dinner, but Ashley already ruined the whole surprise." He laughed a little but he knew it wasn't funny.

"Aiden don't." Spencer looked down at the box that held the ring. "I don't want to have to give you an answer right now. Im going to school 2000 miles away. I don't want to hold you back from anything." Aiden shook his head and was about to speak but Spencer beat him, "No let me talk…" She said in a shaky voice, "I can't be in a long distance relationship, Aiden, especially with that promise. What if you go to UCLA and find the girl of your dreams, you'll regret giving me that ring." She looked at him, "I don't want you going to some away game and you getting hammered and ending up sleeping with some whore." She glared at him, remembering back in junior year when that happened.

Aiden grabbed her hands, "Honey. You are the girl of my dreams. Im not letting you get away from me." Spencer looked away and shook her head.

"You just don't get it, Aiden." She took her hands back, "I don't want to be tied down when im so young." She looked in through the windows and watched Ashley and she sighed and looked back over at Aiden, "Im sorry Aiden… but once im out of college and I know what more I want in my life, if you still want to marry me, then give me this ring." She took his hands in hers and closed the box.

"Im keeping you to that, Spencer." And she smiled and kissed him on the cheek.

"Go to college and be a man now Aiden. Sleep with the head cheerleader, do whatever, okay? Don't let me hold you back." And Aiden looked away; he couldn't help but be sad because of this. She just broke up with him, but still told him that she would marry him. He didn't really exactly know how to feel. "Now let's go have a good rest of the night, Aid. We need it. Come on, we just graduated!" She said excited and she smiled and opened the door and he nodded, hiding the pain he was feeling just then.

Spencer sat back down in her chair next to the brunette and Ashley looked down at her hand and looked back up at Spencer shocked that she didn't take the ring. Spencer looked at Ashley and just smiled, and Ashley knew that smile. It was the smile that only Ashley got. But she still couldn't ever figure out what exactly it meant. But she didn't care then, Spencer didn't take Aiden's promise and that made her selfishly happy. Because maybe, just maybe, it's her chance to get what she can't have for once.


	5. Chapter 5

The entire summer or 2002, the last summer they famous trio would hang out together again for a very long time, the last time anyone would see that happy smile Spencer would have on her face, the very last time Spencer would ever tell someone she loved them for what seems like forever. It was the last day before Spencer left for her cross country road trip by her lonesome to go to college back in her home state. Today, Spencer was no longer a Cobra, she was a Razorback. No longer green and yellow, but now, cardinal red and white. That day was the last day Spencer would ever feel complete.

Spencer pulled into the parking lot of the University, looking at the time on her phone. She was running late, her gorgeous blonde hair a complete mess, dark circles under her restless eyes. She didn't have the time to have her daily coffee, no time to shower, she was a complete mess. She walked to class quickly while digging in her bag in hopes to finding something with sugar in it. Nothing, she's defeated as she takes her seat next to a red head who she became rather friendly with; Annie.

The red haired girl looked over at the exhausted blonde, "Whoa… someone stayed up late." She chuckled tapping her pen on her desk, staring at her friend.

Spencer looked at the red haired girl with daggers in her eyes. Annie lived in the dorm level below Spencer. She had bright blue eyes and freckles across her brim of her nose and cheeks and her laugh was ridiculous, it was usually funnier than what she was laughing at. But Spencer couldn't help but feel a connection with her; maybe it was because she reminded her of Ashley in some ways. She couldn't put her finger on what exactly it was though.

"Shut up." Spencer put her head in her hands and took in a deep breath. The truth to why she looks like a complete mess was because she hasn't slept since she came back home. And when she did, she dreamt about a familiar brunette, sometimes the brunette would be with another girl, completely ignoring Spencer's presence. Different nights the brunette would be attached to her lips and Spencer would wake up breathing heavy and in hot sweats.

Spencer couldn't figure out why this was happening, the sudden insomnia. But now wasn't the time to worry about it, she took out her notebook and a pen and began on taking notes about how to get the perfect angle and capture the perfect moment. She was becoming a film major and was going to minor in photography. It was something that she enjoyed a lot and it let herself express what she was feeling in a whole complete different way than anyone. She had taken up painting in her spare time, which was rare nowadays.

The blonde couldn't help when her mind wandered into a familiar memory, one she replayed over and over again, multiple times a day. One she captured the moment perfectly, and the picture on her desk in her dorm reminded her when she wasn't thinking about it. Ashley. Her favorite subject to capture with the snap of a camera, she was so photogenic, her beauty was so mesmerizing, but she couldn't ever admit that to Ashley. The brunette wouldn't ever feel the same way towards Spencer, so she thought.

_The two girls stood there at the end of the pier, just the two of them excluding the old man who looked to be about in his late sixes, fishing on the other side of the pier they were standing on. Spencer held onto her camera tightly, scared she would drop it over the edge while she captured Ashley looking into the distance, the light of the sun setting on her face, making her eyes sparkle in the light. She was in a whole different world, thinking about how perfect this was. No one could bother them, she was truly happy. You could tell it from the look she had in her eyes, the look saying that she hasn't felt like this since before her father passed away. A look that told Spencer that she never wanted that moment to end._

_When the brunette heard the sound of the shutter, she quickly looked over at her best friend who sat on top of the railing of the pier smiling at her best friend. Ashley shook her head, "What? You're not gonna get all worked up, trying to delete the picture?" Spencer knew she had won this battle when Ashley just smiled back at the blonde and continued to focus on the water and the sun that was now almost set. _

_Spencer hopped down off of the railing, it scared her being up there, especially with her camera. She didn't trust her clumsy self for long to be up there. She stood there for a moment, glancing at the picture she had just taken and she smiled. She turned off her camera and it hung at her side. Her jaw tightens as her heart started to beat faster as she stood next to Ashley. She laid her head upon the brunettes shoulder and closed her eyes, "Im going to miss you, Ash." She admitted quietly to her best friend._

_Ashley swallowed hard as her heart began to pick up and hit the next speed as the wind carried the scent of the blondes hair into her system, "Im going to miss you more…" She said even more quiet than Spencer who didn't say anything in return; she picked her head up off of her shoulder and sighed. Ashley couldn't tell what that meant which frustrated her to her core. She watched as Spencer put on her hood and her hands into her hoodie pocket, her exposed hair flying with the wind. She watched as Spencer's eyes filled up with water and she watched her turn away quickly and turn her attention on the old man._

"_Did you catch something, mister?" The blonde asked walking over to the old guy who looked at her with a genuine smile. Ashley listened to her best friends' voice, there was sadness in it. She watched as the old man nodded, held up the fish he caught next to him, it was about four feet long. Spencer captured a picture of the moment and started asking questions about what kind of fish it was and other things that interested her. She always had good people skills and the old man, Rudy, Spencer found out his name shortly after she took his picture. His wife had just passed a year ago and he turned to fishing to keep his mind off of missing her._

Days passed and Spencer still couldn't sleep, it was Saturday night and she couldn't think of anything to do but sit in her dorm and edit her pictures that she had accumulated over the week. Her phone started to ring and she picked it up, not looking at who it was, "Hello?" she said still concentrated on her computer, fixing up a picture of she had taken earlier that day of these two squirrels who stood back to back eating a nut. Their tails curled together, forming the shape of a heart.

"You forget about me?" The male voice came through the phone and Spencer stopped abruptly looking at the time.

"Shit, Corey im sorry I got caught up with editing pictures." She laughed, trying to lighten the tension between the two; obviously he was upset that she had forgotten about the last minute movie plans.

"It's alright, just get your butt down here, the line is getting long. Annie and her boy toy are already here." Corey was her gay friend who was majoring in architecture. It was an interesting pick for him, but he was really good at designing structural plans.

Spencer quickly hit the save button and closed her laptop, "Okay, im leaving now." She hung up her phone and grabbed her hoodie, the same one she wore that night on the pier. Before turning out the lights, she glanced at the picture of Ashley on her desk; she closed her eyes and replayed the entire memory over again in her mind.

It was something she couldn't forget even if she wanted too, Ashley couldn't forget either. She sat in the studio on a Saturday night recording a song, it had to be perfect. It was going to be the single for her first album that was to be released in two months, November 18th, 2002. It was called 'Invisible'; it was one of the few slower and softer songs on her album.

She sings the end of the chorus loud into the microphone, her manager smiling, knowing that she's going to be a big hit, "You just see right through me but if you only knew me, we could be a beautiful miracle unbelievable instead of just invisible…" and she continues on with the song.

When she finished recording the song, she walked into the room where her producer and manager are sitting and they sit there smiling because she's going to be making them some big bucks. "Great job today, Davies." Ashley smiled at her manager, Ben.

She took a drink of her water as she checked her messages on her phone, 2 missed calls from Kyla, a text from Aiden, and then a voicemail. She figured it was just from Kyla so she didn't bother on listening to it, she just called her sister back.


	6. Chapter 6

It was one of the longest weeks for Ashley Davies with recording and becoming a big rock star, following the steps of her famous father. She sat across the Starbucks table from her best friend Aiden telling him all about how good her life is now and how great she's doing. He just sits there, nodding and throwing in a few 'yeah' and 'mhm' whenever she would finish sentences. She was getting annoyed with him really fast, ever since Spencer left for school, he just wasn't himself.

The two sat in silence, sipping their coffee when Aiden's phone starting ringing, "Hey… yeah we're in here… kay." And he hung up and Ashley stared at him with confusion. "Oh it's this chick I've been talking too… she's the head cheerleader at UCLA." And then the door swings open and in walks in a brunette, she walks like she has a purpose. Defiantly a cheerleader. Aiden stood up and pulled out the chair between him and Ashley, "Ash this is Morgan. Morgan this is my best friend, Ashley." Ashley watched the two sit down and there was obvious connection between the two.

Morgan smiled over at Ashley, "I've heard so much about you." Ashley looked over at Aiden and laughed lightly, "Aiden tells me you're a musician?"

Ashley nods, "Yeah, im a badass one too." She smiles proudly, confident in that particularly subject.

Then the new girl looks over at Aiden who was watching her, sitting there with a smile on his face, which Ashley hasn't seen in almost two months. "I'll be right back, im going to go get a coffee." She smiles at him and he nods at her and looks over at Ashley, raising his eyebrows.

She knows what he's asking without him even saying anything, "8." Nothing compares to a certain blonde who they both ranked 10. "But I give her ass a 4." The two best friends share a laugh together as Morgan makes her way back to the table with her drink.

They spent another hour there just enjoying their Saturday afternoon not having to do anything. Tomorrow was the 18th and Ashley had an appointment that evening with a local LA Radio Station for an interview which she was going to get Aiden to record for her. She couldn't wait for the interview; it'd be her first one ever.

She hopped into her silver Porsche and drove back to her apartment where her sister, Kyla was at still. She walked into the door to Kyla, "I see you haven't moved since I left this morning." She said as she walked past her sister who was lying on the couch, watching Saturday morning cartoons still.

Kyla ignored her sister and continued on watching the TV while Ashley jumped into the shower before getting ready for her interview. She couldn't help but let her mind wonder about what Spencer was up too, how she was dying to talk to her, to see her. She missed her best friend so bad and they haven't spoken much since she left.

She poured shampoo into the palm of her hand, taking too much of course. She thought about if Spencer would be hurt if she knew that Aiden was talking to this new girl, hanging out with her alone. She began washing her hair, closing her eyes and picturing the day on the pier. She wondered if Spencer ever thought about that day either. She didn't know why, but for some reason, that day meant a lot to Ashley.

_The sun had just gone down and the two girls were on the beach, the lamp from the pier shinning the spot they sat with light. Spencer was building a sandcastle while Ashley destroyed the parts she had just put up. Spencer would laugh and push her best friend and tell her that she wasn't allowed to touch the castle anymore and Ashley would just smile at the blonde._

_The tide was coming up, but neither girl noticed, they were both too distracted by the others presence. Spencer shot up when the cold salt water hit her and she knocked over her entire castle which put Ashley in a fit of giggles. Spencer just glared at her and put her hands on her hips "Don't make me sit on you." She threaten Ashley which made her laugh even more._

"_I don't get why you think that's a threat, Spence." She laughed and Spencer glared more, "I mean… you're so tiny!" Spencer gasped and jumped on Ashley who couldn't control her laughter, "Spencer! You're wet!" _

_Spencer giggled at the comment, "That's for ruining my sand castle! I was gonna be a princess!" she sat on Ashley's stomach, she crossed her arms and pouted._

_Ashley couldn't help but smile up at the blonde, she was just so beautiful in the moonlight, she so badly wanted to tell her, but knew she couldn't, "What was I gonna be?" She watched as Spencer raised her eye brows and smile to herself and then shrug, "What? Tell me!" Now Ashley was really curious what just went through the girls mind._

_Spencer took her fingers and acted like she was zipping her lips and she shrugged again. She grabbed her camera and held it above her and she quickly told Ashley to smile and she took a picture. When she went to look at the picture, Ashley was flipping the camera off. She quickly looked down at the brunette and frowned, "Ashley!" She got off of her best friend and sat down next to her, "Take a picture with meeee!" She smiled dorky and big which Ashley couldn't ever say no too. _

"_Finneeee." Ashley sat up and sat there next to the blonde as she snapped a couple of pictures of the two of them making funny faces._

"_Okay okay, serious ones now." Spencer smiled over at Ashley who nodded and Spencer held the camera out in front of them and right before she snapped the camera, Spencer leaned over and kissed Ashley on the cheek which made her smile even bigger which showed in the picture._

_Spencer was blushing really hard; she had no idea where that came from. She focused on the viewing the picture, "Spencee? What was that? It was supposed to be serious." Ashley tried to hide her smile and she hoped Spencer wouldn't see her blush._

"_Yeah but look at that smile!" Spencer showed Ashley the picture and Ashley held onto the camera, looking at the picture. _

Spencer had her eyes closed as she laid the kiss upon Ashley's cheek who wasn't looking at the camera like she originally was, she was looking down, her smile showed how happy she was in that moment. Ashley put the picture back down on her dresser, next to the picture of Aiden, Spencer, and herself on the first day of freshmen year.

She grabbed her purse and slipped into some flip flops and was on her way to her interview to talk about her song and then have it to be played for the first time ever. She was really nervous, she didn't know why though. Ashley never got nervous unless she was around Spencer. Maybe she was nervous because the song was about Spencer, she couldn't figure it out.

She climbed out of her car and walked into the studio, waited a few minutes before she was called back. She took a seat across from Bob who looked to be in his late 40's. He began talking into the microphone, "We have here tonight as a guest, Ashley Davies. She's a brand new artist and yes folks, she is the child of the famous rock star, Raiff Davies!" He looks over at her, "So tell us, Ash, what made you want to start singing?"

"Well it started when I was three and I was back stage at my dad's concert and I wondered on stage, completely naked and I stopped the entire band from playing and my dad laughed. He handed me his microphone and I sang out to everyone the ABC's. The crowd went wild." Bob laughed at the image and she chuckled remembering everything.

They talked a little more about how Ashley got started with singing, how she never had lessons, she was good from the start. Bob looked over at her, "Alrighty, well we only have a few minutes left until we play your first single, Invisible. Tell us, did you write the song?" Bob leaned back in his seat and stared at Ashley who became really nervous again.

"Um… I did actually. I write all my music and write all my own songs. It runs in my blood." She chuckled knowing the question coming up.

"I don't want to give the song away, but is it about anyone in particular?"

Ashley swallowed hard, "Yeah. Someone special."

"Ohhh… looks like Miss Davies here has a secret love life!" Bob laughed, it wasn't even funny. "Well thanks Ashley for stopping by. And here it is folks, the newest, the hottest, the latest from the Davies generation, 'Invisible'!" He hit a couple of buttons and the song began to play, she listened to the beginning of the song, "She can't see the way your eyes light up when you smile, She'll never notice how you stop and stare whenever she walks by, And you can't see me wantin you the way you want her, But you are everything to me…"

Ashley walked out of the studio, her song playing in her head. Her cell phone ringing, people wanting to tell her how good her song was, they wanted to congratulate her. She didn't answer any of the calls she let them all go to voicemail, she'd check them when she'd get home. She wanted so bad to get in her bed, and sleep. She hasn't sleep in what seemed like weeks because she's been so busy with work.

When Ashley got home, she quickly changed into an old t-shirt and just her underwear, she grabbed her phone and sat on her bed and called her voicemail. She had five new voicemails and she listened to the frist one, Aiden. Second one she didn't care, she erased it as well as the third one. Fourth one was from Kyla and the fifth one she wasn't even going to bother to listen too but as soon as she was going to hit erase, she noticed the voice, "Hey Ash… um… it's me." Spencer. "It's like… really late there I know, I was just thinking about you. I remembered that your single is coming out in two weeks… im proud of you!" Ashley's mouth dropped. Spencer left the message two weeks ago and she's just now listening to it. "I really miss you, Ashley. If you could, call me back as soon as you get a chance… I really need to talk to you."


	7. Chapter 7

**So I don't really know how yall like the story cause like, no one reviews it. haha. Meaning, more people should start reviewing and give me some input [:**

There Spencer laid, in a bed too big for just one person. She doesn't know what to think anymore about anyone back in Los Angeles. Her friends from high school barely talks to her now and her dad calls her once a week on Sundays. She doesn't even know her brothers anymore or what's going on in her best friends' life. It's like, when she moved back to Arkansas, she was just simply forgotten back west. She hated that feeling but she felt like if she was forgotten, then she too needed to forget about everyone then as well. But it's hard to forget when all you can do when you can't sleep is wonder about the people you know and love and why they decided not to return a simple phone call.

She decided that tomorrow would be the day she'd forget about everyone and move on with her life. She decided that she'd drop by her grandparents' house which she was completely excited about, she hasn't seen them in years. She couldn't wait to sit around and play card games just like the old times. It was a tradition ever since she could remember whenever her grandparents were around; they'd play card games to board games to yard games. It was the happiest time of her life till the past summer she had spent mostly with Ashley Davies who she was so upset with but no matter how much she forced herself not to think about Ashley, the more she thought about her.

"_I can't believe you, Ash!" Spencer yelled across her bedroom at her best friend who stood by the door, ready to run, with her water gun in her hands. Spencer stood by the window where she was shot with a super soaker. She stared at the brunette who just smiled like she did nothing wrong. "You. Are. So. Dead." The blonde leaped onto her bed and over it and ran after the brown-eyed girl who bolted down the stairs of an empty house._

_Ashley ran through the kitchen and through the sliding glass doors, followed by Spencer who was determined to catch her and make her pay for what she did. Ashley ran down the porch steps and ran behind the pool and crouched down, peering around seeing where the blonde was. When she turned to check the other way, the blonde had her own super soaker and shot Ashley who fell into a fit of laughter along with Spencer._

Ashley tried to run again but Spencer caught her and took her to the ground where she straddled her best friend and pointed to large water gun at the brunette, "Say uncle." And Ashley shook her head and tried pushing Spencer off of her, which resulted with the blonde in shooting her best friend, "Say uncllee!" She said between laughter and Ashley once again shook her head no and attempted to push her best friend off of her. Spencer squirted her once again until the gun was out of water and when that happened, Spencer started poking Ashley's sides which made the two girls laugh even more.

"_Get offff!" Ashley laughed and pushed Spencer off of her and started to run back inside where the blonde followed. She got up to Spencer's room and shut the door before the blonde could get inside where she banged on the door for Ashley to let her in. "Who is it?" Ashley asked from the other side of the room._

"_Room service!" Spencer attempted to say in a foreign accent but failed which made Ashley laugh more._

"_Nope! Don't want none!" Ashley leaned against the door, forcing Spencer to stay out of the room. She could hear Spencer starting to get frustrated which made her smile. She looked around Spencer's room and her eyes landed on a shirt that was dry compared to the one she was wearing, so she decided to give up and walk away from the door and over to the plain white v-neck shirt. _

_As Ashley slowly took off her soaked shirt, Spencer walked into the room and froze, her eyes landing on the perfectly bronze skin, the outlines of her best friends abs. Her heart began to race, she was no longer laughing and Ashley looked over at the blonde as she held onto the white shirt and she smiled at Spencer. "I got a new bra, look." And she pointed at her chest and Spencer was forced to look which made her heart race even more, the longer she stared. Ashley smirked as she slid on Spencer's white shirt and crawled onto the bed and grabbed the remote from the nightstand and began to watch TV, leaving Spencer standing by the doorway, "Come on silly, watch TV with me." Spencer nodded and didn't say anything, she just climbed onto her bed and sat there next to Ashley and they simply just watched TV together._

Spencer woke up to her phone buzzing on her nightstand, she had just fallen asleep. She glanced at the clock and it read 2:47 am. She groaned as she reached for her phone and she read the name on the caller id, _Ashley. _Her jaw tighten and her eyes burned, she flipped open her phone and quickly debated with herself if she should answer it or not. She hit ignore and placed her phone back down on the nightstand. Ashley knew when Spencer ignored her or not because she knew when the ring back tone would end.

Ashley felt like she deserved it, but she wouldn't leave Spencer a message, she needs to actually tell her why it's taken her two weeks to call her back. She wouldn't dare leave it in a voice mail. Ashley ran into Kyla's room, "Ky! I don't know what to do!" She said quickly to her sister who was lying in her bed watching re-runs of Friends.

Kyla looked at her sister, "With?"

"Spencer." Kyla looked at Ashley for her to continue, "She called two weeks ago and left a message but my phone didn't tell me I had a missed call from her and I thought the voice mail was from you!" Ashley sat down on the edge of her sister's bed.

"And you didn't listen to it because you thought it was from me? Bitch." Kyla chuckled and shook her head, "Ashley, I have no idea what you could do. Have you called yet?" She nodded, "Well…?"

Ashley's head fell into her hands, "She ignored my call…" She said with sadness in her voice.

Kyla turned the TV down and moved to the edge of the bed next to her sister, "Just keep trying, Ash. All-"

"What if she hates me!" Ashley said cutting off her sister who sighed and shook her head.

"Ashley, Ashley. Listen to me. It's Spencer, she can't hate you. You screw a lot of things up and plus, she's your best friend and you're hers. This isn't something she'd hate you about. She'd hate you if you slept with Aiden." Kyla looked at her sister who looked like she was about to cry. "Ashley, I know you love her…" Kyla admitted quietly.

Ashley quickly looked at her sister, "…what? No I don't. I don't know what you're talking about. She's my best friend; I can't love her like that, that's wrong."

Kyla shook her head, "Ash, it's obvious. Just give her some time, she'll come around." Kyla moved back to her spot under the covers and turned the TV back up. Ashley sat there, wondering what exactly Kyla meant by the statement. But whatever it was, she'd sleep on it. Today was a long day for the new rock star.

Spencer pulled up to a big white house; she smiled big as she put her car into park and jumped out of the car. She watched her grandma walked out of the front door and waited on the top step to meet her. "Meemaw!" She ran up to the lady who raised her along with Clay since her father wasn't around much. "God I missed you so much!" She pulled away from the hug and smiled at her grandpa who was walking out of the front door. "Papaw!" She grinned from ear to ear as she was engulfed in a hug from a wise man, her grandfather.

"You're just in time, sugar. We're having a dinner party tonight." Spencer followed her grandparents into the house which sat on 7 acres of just open space and a huge lake down the road a half mile. She knew this place like the back of her hand and she thank god that it was only forty five minutes from the school she was at. "You remember the Adams down the road a few miles?" Meemaw asked while she continued to work on her famous meatloaf and many other dishes. Spencer nodded and took a seat at the table next to her grandfather who sat drinking a budlight. "Well they're bringing their son, Jacob."

"Didn't you used to run around with that boy when you were younger?" Papaw asked before he took a drink from the longneck.

Spencer smiled, "Yeah, we were best buddies." Jake was the boy who she first kissed in preschool under the art table. He told her that one day they'd be getting married out by the lake one day.

Spencer got up and decided to help out her grandma while her grandparents asked many questions about life, the family, and school. She answered them all and told them all about how she loves what she's majoring in and that someday they'll be watching a film shot by her. She made her grandparents happier than ever. She told them about how Clay was a heart surgeon and agreed on trying to get them all to come out for a visit here soon, it was long over due.

With everything caught up, people started coming and more food showed up. She didn't recognize any of these people, but everyone recognized her. She could hear football coming from the living room and talking and laughing coming from the kitchen. The weather outside was getting colder and the sun was beginning to set earlier.

Spencer smiled at people while she made her way to the kitchen; people of all ages were here. She grabbed herself a drink and slid outside through the sliding glass doors and stood on the porch and watched some of the guys toss around the football. "Here she is!" Spencer turned around at the sound of her grandma's voice and her eyes landed on a tall, brown hair, green eye boy. He wore a cowboy hat and his plaid shirt was un-buttoned which showed a plain white shirt. His wranglers covered his cowboy boots and his deep raspy voice caught her breath, "Hey Spencer." He tipped his hat and her and she smiled and uttered out a shy 'hi'. She didn't know what was happening, but her heart raced as she took in this image of a grown up Jacob Adams, and she forgot about the world and everyone around her.

Jake smiled, "What? Cat got your tongue? Get your ass over here." He laughed as he brought Spencer into his strong arms and gave her a hug which she hugged back happily. "What have you been up too? You look great." He smiled from ear to ear at the blonde.

Spencer couldn't help but smile back; she guessed that cowboy's were a weakness of hers, "Not much really. Im in college now, I just graduated back in June from highschool. I want to be a film major and then do photography on the side. What about you?"

She watched as he shrugged, "Nothing close to that." He laughed, "I mean, I graduated from school and all, but I took over my pops ranch, he moved down to the city. Wanted a change and I couldn't leave my roots behind you know?" He smiled at the blonde, "I work at Tim's shop up in town, welding and working on cars. I should get my mechanics license here soon." He was 19 and already doing so much.

Spencer laughed a little, "Still got that cowboy, ranch dream don't ya, Jakey?" She smiled at the green-eyed boy.

"I've got a lotta dreams, Spencer. Some things just never change." His smile was bright as he stared at Spencer. "You sure do look like you just came from California." He laughed looking at her stylist outfit, no longer a country style.

She looked down at her outfit, "What's wrong with what im wearing?" She burrowed her eyebrows in confusion.

"Not a thing, Spencer. You look… wow. But we gotta get you back into those country clothes." He shook his head, "The big city took a real big toll on ya, Princess." Spencer's mouth dropped a little and she laughed as she playfully hit him on the arm. Before they knew it, they were catching up on every little thing. One thing that never came up though was Aiden or Ashley. But through out the conversation with Jacob, her mind would wonder off and wonder about the two of them. Wondering what they were up too, even if she was upset with her.

But tonight, she forgot about them. She forgot about her life back in California. She was finally home.


	8. Chapter 8

_I just don't understand why you just don't go apologize to her in person and finally claim your girl? _Kyla's words spun around in Ashley's head as she quickly threw a couple of shirts into a bag along with some pants and a few changes of underwear and bra's. She walked to her closet and looked down at her wide selection of shoes she had sitting on the floor along the sides of the wall. She grabbed her Uggs and flip flops and threw them into her bag and slipped on her black converse. She grabbed her jacket and slipped it on and zipped her duffle bag.

She walked over to her computer and hit the print button and she quickly shut her laptop when she retrieved the paper she needed. As she walked out of her room, she looked over the paper and made sure all of the information was right. She quickly walked into Kyla's room who was getting ready to go out for the night, "Thanks Ky for the push I needed." Her sister smiled over at her, "I'll see you in a few days." Ashley smiled brightly and walked out of her apartment and as she waited for the elevator to come up to her floor, she pulled out her phone to hear Spencer's message once more, _Hey Ash… um… it's me. It's like… really late there I know, I was just thinking about you. I remembered that your single is coming out in two weeks… im proud of you! I really miss you, Ashley. If you could, call me back as soon as you get a chance… I really need to talk to you._

Ashley waved down a cab and she threw her bag into the backseat and climbed in, "LAX. Pronto." She put her seatbelt on and looked out of the window through her dark sunglasses. Spencer's message was a motivation for Ashley; it was fuel to her fire. Her plan. She unfolded the piece of paper that had Spencer's address written on it. She was going to surprise Spencer, and she couldn't wait to see her best friend but she hoped that her plan wouldn't backfire on herself.

When Ashley arrived at the airport, she threw a fifty dollar bill at the cab driver and told him to keep the change as she slammed the door shut, she made her way into the terminal and up through security and down to her gate. She stood in front of eight screens that told her about departures and arrivals on planes. She looked for her plane and saw that it was on time, she sighed and walked over to her gate and took a sit next to a guy around the same age as herself. He looked at her and glanced down at her ticket, his eyes going wider, "Ashley…" She looked at the man, "Ashley Davies?"

Ashley suddenly felt weird, she didn't know this guy, and how did he know her? "Yes?"

"Oh my god this is so exciting!" He said with a smile, "I love your song that came out a few weeks ago!"

Ashley looked around at all of the people who were now staring at her, "Um… you're causing a scene." She said uncomfortably.

"Im sorry, you probably get this all of the time, but can you sign something for me? It'd make my life!" He exclaimed and Ashley shrugged as she watched the random guy pull out a notebook with song lyrics written all over it, one's she didn't recognize.

"Did you write those?" She asked as he opened his notebook and handed her a pen. He nodded as Ashley signed a blank page. She closed the notebook and read some of the lines, "They're pretty good." She smiled at him and he started blushing. Over the intercom, a lady announced that her plane was boarding, "Well, that's me." She smiled at the guy and she made her way to her plane. Her plan is going perfectly so far, Ashley just hoped that it would keep continuing this way.

Meanwhile, Spencer spent the entire weekend out with Jacob, catching up on forever. She never once thought about her old life, her old friends, her old problems. Being around Jacob made her feel like her little self again, even if they only spent a year together, that year was one of the best years of her life. She couldn't believe how much fun she's been having with him, just getting back into her old country roots.

They both walked into her grandma's house, passing through the living room where her grandpa sat in the recliner chair, a beer in one hand and the remote in the other, passed out with his mouth opened and a bit of spit starting to make its way down his chin. The two laughed as they made their way up to her old room. "Okay they gotta be in here somewhere." Jacob said pulling open the closet door, Spencer standing next to him with her hands on her hips.

"Im tellin' ya Jake, I doubt they're gonna fit me anymore." She watched as Jacob pushed clothes out of the way and retrieved an old pair of cowgirl boots.

They both laughed, "Well… they're only about 7 sizes too small now." He handed Spencer her old boots and she looked at them and shook her head. "Let's go get you some good ones for tonight's party down by the lake." He smiled at her and led her out to his lifted, beat up Chevy truck.

When they got to the store, Spencer went straight to the boot section while Jacob talked to the guy behind the desk; she assumed he was a good friend of his. She looked at the minimum selection of girls' boots when her mind wandered off to Ashley. She froze and all she could think about was that beautiful face and how dreamy her chocolate brown eyes were. She thought about how hurt she was because she never returned her phone call, she really needed to talk to her best friend. Spencer pulled out her phone from her purse, quickly glancing over at Jacob and the guy behind the desk before she opened her phone, she went to Ashley's number and stared at it for a minute, debating on calling or not. But she knew it was the right thing to do, she hit that little green button.

She closed her eyes and hung the phone up, "Of course it goes straight to voicemail." She said under her breath, a little sad. She really missed Ashley.

"So you find any you like?" Jacob asked walking over to Spencer, putting his arm around her shoulders.

"Umm… yeah these." She grabbed a pair of boots in her size and they both walked over to the counter.

"Ahh, you must be the infamous Spencer Carlin." The blonde haired boy behind the counter smiled, taking the boots from her. Spencer smiled shyly back at him and looked up at Jacob who just smiled. "Yeah, he talks about you a lot. Im Brad by the way." He stuck out his hand and shook Spencer's hand and then handed her the new boots.

"We'll see you at the party tonight?" Jacob asked before walking out of the store with Spencer by his side and of course Brad was going to be there, they were best friends.

When Jacob and Spencer got back to his truck they went straight to his house to get ready for the party tonight. She was going to borrow some of his younger sister's clothes who wore the same size as she did. She needed a few things to fit in a little better.

Ashley sat down at the rental car shop, she closed her eyes. She was tired of traveling; she had no idea where she was anymore. This was like a foreign country to the brunette. But the only thing keeping her motivated was getting to see Spencer soon.

"Miss Davies?" The guy walked over to Ashley and handed her a set of keys to a brand new Chevy Malibu. She smiled a 'thanks' to him and slipped on her glasses. Before she got into the car, she asked for directions to the college and he typed them into the gps system in the car, "It'll take you right there if you follow this pink line." He smiled at her.

Ashley pulled up into the parking lot of the college Spencer attends and her heart started racing so fast. This was it, this is when it all happens, when she finally gets to see Spencer and get everything off of her chest that she's been dying to get off since the ninth grade. She looked in the rearview mirror quickly before jumping out of the car, many people staring at the California beauty walking across the campus.

She walked through the front doors of her dorm building and looked at the directory which told her the last names of the residents of which dorms. She found 'Carlin' and she smiled happily as she ran to the elevator and waited patiently. The metal doors opened and she pushed the number three button, the top floor. Classy. She looked at the people next to her, a guy was checking her out and his girlfriend slapped him. She smiled to herself and watched the numbers go up to three.

When the doors slid open, she ran out and down the halls, muttering '803' to herself. "801, 802… 803." She stopped in front of the white door that had 'Carlin' written on a piece of paper and it hung below the peep hole. She smiled to herself and right before she knocked, a red headed girl showed up behind her and startled her, "She's not here."

Ashley turned around, breathing kind of heavy from running and being startled, "What?"

"Spencer? She's not here…" The red head girl looked at Ashley, "You look familiar." She said looking at Ashley's face, and then she realized who she was. She was the girl in the picture frames around Spencer's room. Ashley was the girl Spencer always talked about, thousand of stories Annie sat through. "You're Ashley…"

Ashley looked at the girl, "…yes?" She hoped to herself that this wasn't another incident like she had at the airport in Los Angeles.

"Oh my god… you can't be here… she's not here…" Annie said, she knew how much Spencer loved this girl.

"Um… do you know Spencer?" Ashley asked, feeling a little sad because Spencer wasn't even here.

Annie nodded her head, "Yeah, she talks about you nonstop…" Ashley smiled big, "She's… why you here?" Annie asked.

Ashley shifted her weight onto her other foot, "Could you please just tell me where she's at?" Ashley asked with sadness in her voice, "I need to see her…" Annie smiled and quickly wrote down Spencer's grandparents address and gave her directions and everything. Before Ashley left, she felt like she needed to formally introduce herself to this girl, seeing as she's one of Spencer's good friends here at the school, "Im Ashley by the way."

"I know. I know a lot about you." Annie chuckled, "Im Annie." She smiled at the brunette and watched her walk away.

Spencer sat on the tailgate of Jacob's truck in her brand new cowboy boots, a cute flannel shirt and some good ole wrangler jeans. She had a beer in her hand, this was the first and only one she'll drink, and she wasn't much of a drinker, not like anyone else here. The fire was burning high in front of her, the people yelling around her, something just didn't feel right.

Jacob sat down next to Spencer and he put his arm around her shoulders, he's been doing this all week. She took a sip of her beer while she roasted a marsh mellow; she was having some fun at least. Another blonde walked over to where Spencer and Jacob sat and put her hand on Spencer's thigh and Jacob smiled big, Spencer just looked at the girl. "I haven't seen you around before." She smiled leaning close to Spencer's ear so she could be heard over the blasting music, her breath smelled like alcohol.

Spencer was starting to feel a little bit uncomfortable with the blonde this close to her, "Yeah im from California actually." The blonde pulled away and smiled big.

"Im Carrie." Jacob took his arm off of Spencer's shoulders and stood next to Brad.

"Spencer." She took another drink of her beer before setting it down to grab some graham crackers and a piece of chocolate but before she could do any of that, the blonde was attacking Spencer's neck.

"This right here? This is why I love dating a chick who's bi." Brad laughed standing next to his best friend.

Spencer's breath caught and let out a tiny moan unconsciously as the blonde attacked her neck and running her hands up her thighs. She could feel Carrie smile into her neck and Spencer decided that she would have a little bit of fun with this and ran her hands the front of Carrie's body, feeling her up which made Carrie's breath catch. The two girls looked at one another and just simply smiled and Spencer's arms rest around the girls' waist, she took one hand and pulled Carrie down to meet her lips and they started kissing.

"How much did your girl drink to pull that move?" Brad looked over at Jacob who looked shocked at what was happening in front of him.

"Two sips of one beer…" He said staring at the two blondes making out in front of him. "Does your girl sleep with other girls?" Brad nodded, "And you don't even care?"

Brad shook his head, "Why would I? It's fucking hot." He laughed and continued to watch his girlfriend make out with Spencer.

Carrie pulled away from Spencer, both of them breathing heavy; she grabbed Spencer's hand and made her stand up. Spencer smiled at Carrie, she was defiantly having fun now, and Carrie was a hands down ten. "Let's go somewhere?" Carrie smiled holding onto Spencer's hand, leading her past the fire a little bit towards a car.

Spencer's heart started to race and she didn't dare look back Jacob, she smiled at Carrie and stopped walking. Spencer pulled her into her body and started kissing her again; she didn't want to wait until the car. She wanted everybody to see how brave she was being, making out with another girl at a random party. Something she never does and she felt really good about doing it.

Jacob ran over to the two girls and pulled them apart and they both started blushing really hard, "Yall are gonna get hit by the car." All three of them looked at the car that was pulling up. "Who drives a brand new Malibu?" He asked loudly for anybody to answer.

**Alright, let's get more than three people to review this time!**


	9. Chapter 9

**Thanks to everyone who reviewed, I was very surprised that I got more than three reviews this time around; in return, I give you a longer chapter. The more reviews I get, the longer the chapters will be. Sound good? **

Brad walked over to where his best friend, Spencer, and his girlfriend were standing. He stood in between Jacob and Carrie and looked at the car, holding his arm up slightly in front of his face to block the headlights from his eyes. "Damn, whoever drives a Malibu has got to be smokin' hot." With that comment, Brad earned a smack on the arm from his girlfriend. Jacob laughed as he listened to the two bicker. He glanced over at Spencer who was making her way back over to his truck to pick up her beer.

Carrie followed her and the two boys watched their girls sit back down on the tailgate and continue on with roasting marsh mellows. Jacob stood there watching how the light from the fire hit Spencer's face; it danced in her deep blue eyes. "Dude." Brad said, making Jacob turn around and his eyes landed on a gorgeous brunette.

Both boys' mouths dropped opened as they watched her hips sway, her brunette hair flowing back in the wind, her perfectly toned bronze stomach peeking out from underneath her shirt. Everyone at the party stopped what they were doing and watched Ashley make her way over to Jacob and Brad who stood in front of her car, mouths still open.

"Carrie you marsh mellow is on fir-" Spencer saw that Carrie's focus was on something completely different and it wouldn't matter if she had told her new friend about her burning marsh mellow. She followed her focus and noticed everyone around her were completely quiet. Her very own eyes landed on this gorgeous brunette and she dropped her stick to the ground. "Oh. My. God." She heard Carrie laugh at her reaction.

Spencer watched as Jacob turned around and pointed to her. Her stomach was doing 360 degree flips and her heart was about to jump out of her throat. Her hands instantly became slightly damp and she couldn't take her eyes off of Ashley. She was really here and Spencer had no idea why or what she would do. She was supposed to be mad at Ashley, not have this kind of reaction.

By the time Ashley made her way over to Spencer, everyone went back to their own thing. Brad and Jacob both ran over to where the three girls were now. Ashley walked pass the bonfire and she smiled brightly at Spencer who happily returned the gesture. She stood up and started walking towards the brunette and she stood in front of her, "Ashley." Spencer smiled from ear to ear. She was ecstatic that her best friend was here.

Ashley pulled Spencer into a tight hug, "Hey Spence." Spencer closed her eyes and hugged Ashley back. She inhaled the way the other girl smelled and hugging Ashley felt so right, she never wanted to let her go.

"Whoa… you know her?" Carrie stood next to Spencer who never took her eyes off of Ashley.

Spencer smiled, "Yeah, she's my best friend." Spencer too never took her eyes off of Ashley and Ashley never took her eyes off of Spencer.

"I love your music!" Carrie exclaimed which made Ashley break the eye contact and remember why she was actually here. "I already preordered the CD." Carrie smiled big, standing in front of her was a rock star and she couldn't believe she came to such a small town as this.

"Thanks. Spence, can I talk to you for a minute?" Ashley looked back over at her best friend and Spencer nodded and the two girls started walking over to the lake, where there the dock was empty. They didn't say anything on the walk over, but neither minded it was a comfortable silence. Once on the dock, Spencer took a seat on the edge of the dock and slipped off her boots and socks and stuck her feet into the cold water. Ashley took a seat next to the blonde and followed her lead, "Oh shit!" Spencer laughed, "It's freezing balls." Ashley laughed looking over at the blonde who was so comfortable with the water already.

Spencer focused on the dark water, moving her feet which made ripples, "Why are you here, Ash?" She never looked over at the brunette.

She heard Ashley sigh, "I wanted to simply apologize…" She trailed off and finally Spencer looked at her friend. "I never got your message till the other night…" She hung her head, "Im sorry Spencer…"

Spencer laughed, her best friend was literally crazy, "And so you came two thousand miles to say that?" There was a sweet, simple smile on the blondes face.

Ashley looked at Spencer and smiled back, "And I wanted to see your fat ass." The two girls laughed and Spencer pushed the brunette playfully.

"You're kind of a jerk, you know that?" Ashley nodded at the blondes' comment, "But im glad you came." Spencer admitted quietly, playing with the hem of her shirt. Ashley was making Spencer nervous and that scared her half to death. "But should I know about anyone else coming for a surprise visit?" Ashley knew who exactly Spencer was talking about; Aiden.

"Nope, it's just my sexy ass." Ashley smiled big over at Spencer who returned the gesture. "So you forgive me?" Ashley asked quietly, watching Spencer's every move. She watched as the moon light hit Spencer's face, her eyes smiled in her presence. Her eyes trailed down the blondes' body, she had never seen Spencer in plaid before; actually she had never seen Spencer in any of her country clothes. She was so much more beautiful with her cowgirl clothes.

Spencer shrugged; she never looked over at Ashley, "I don't know… I really needed you that night, Ash. You couldn't just simply call your voicemail?" She looked into Ashley's dark chocolate brown eyes, "Or maybe the next day see that I called and be like, 'oh I should call her back?'" Spencer looked back down at the water, "Did me leaving even matter to you?" Spencer asked quietly, not wanting to hear the answer.

Ashley heard everyone behind her yelling and singing along to the music, they were having a great time. She couldn't believe that Spencer showed up to a party, but maybe southern parties were a lot different than the ones in Los Angeles. She swallowed hard and her jaw tightened, "Of course it mattered to me, Spence. I lost my best friend and-"

"Then why haven't you even called once since I left? Where's a letter telling me that you cared? Hmm?" Spencer had tears forming in her eyes, she didn't mean for this to come up. She just missed Ashley so entirely much, but she felt like Ashley didn't even miss her and that hurt the blonde deeply.

"Spencer." Ashley said in a quiet voice, Spencer looked into Ashley's eyes and she saw that they were sad but then again, they smiled at her. "You have no idea how much I care about you." There was a hint of sadness in Ashley's voice. "I love you Spencer," Spencer's heart raced as she heard those words, "You can ask anyone, I've been miserable since you left to come back here. You are a big part of my life, Spence… you are the one who pushed me into following my father's footsteps and you've helped me through everything I've ever been through since elementary. You were there when I came out to everyone, when I dropped out of school, when my dad died. You leaving tore me apart and my heart broke, Spencer when I watched you leave. I don't know how to handle losing the biggest part of my life, and im sorry, Spence…" A tear slowly ran down Ashley's cheek, she hadn't opened up that much since the night her father died. Spencer engulfed the brunette in a hug and they sat there under the moonlight like that for what seemed like forever to both of the girls.

"Come on," Spencer pulled away from Ashley, she reached her hand up to the brunettes face and wiped away a tear that escaped, "I want you to meet some of my friends." The two girls smiled at each other and Spencer stood up, reaching her hand up for Ashley to take to help her up. Without ever letting go of her hand, Spencer led Ashley over to the truck where her friends were at, "Everyone this is my best friend back from California, Ashley." Her smile was a true smile, and the cause of it was Ashley and Jacob could defiantly see that, "Ashley, this is Brad, Carrie, and Jacob. He was my best friend in preschool." She smiled brightly and Ashley smiled at all of her friends.

"So are you single?" Brad asked and Carrie smacked him across the face. "What? You were making out with Spencer! I can at least ask her that." Brad exclaimed, looking at his girlfriend.

Spencer's eye went wide and she dropped Ashley's hand, Carrie smiled big and looks over at Spencer. Ashley's mouth dropped and her eyes went wide as well, she looked at Spencer as well, "Yeah and she's a pretty damn good kisser." Carrie winked at the blonde and all of the sudden, jealously flushed over Ashley.

Spencer was shocked that Brad just announced that in front of Ashley, she was pissed about the comment that Carrie just made but then again it was good to hear that she wasn't a horrible kisser, "She's known me forever and I still haven't gotten to kiss her!" Jacob exclaimed obviously jealous as well.

"Can you guys like, shut up?" Spencer said quickly, now embarrassed. She couldn't look over at Ashley, she didn't want to see her expression, she was scared of it even though Ashley was gay, she didn't want her thinking Spencer was just copying her.

Carrie stood up, "Whoaaa." She started laughing, spilling her beer a little bit. She put her hand on the back of Spencer's neck and pulled her into another kiss before she walked over to a different group of people.

Ashley continued to stare at her best friend, "Damn woman." She laughed which made Spencer blush and cover her eyes with her hands, "First I find you and your first party and then I find out you've been making out with a girl for the first time ever as well." Ashley laughed; she couldn't believe her best friend was actually doing this stuff. "And to top it off, you're drinking!" She smiled at the blonde who was completely red.

Spencer looked at Ashley and she couldn't read her expression for the first time in forever, "It's um… actually not the first time I've made out with a girl." She laughed nervously and Ashley's eyes went wide, now she was even more jealous. "Or at a party." Spencer hid her face with her hands, she was embarrassed. "Or with alcohol." She admitted quietly through her hands.

Jacob looked at the way Ashley was looking at Spencer and he didn't like the way, he felt threatened by her, so he snaked his arm around Spencer's waist which made her tense up. She put her arms down by her sides and took a step to the side, making it seem like she did it to grab her beer from off of the tailgate, "Want a beer?" Brad tossed over a can of budlight and Ashley smiled a thanks.

Everyone at the party started to sing along with the radio, they were all slurring their words, everyone Jacob and Ashley. They sat together on the tailgate in front of the bonfire and Spencer was defiantly a lightweight, after two beers she was careless and obviously drunk. Spencer was nodding to the song that was playing and she started singing quietly along with it, "Cause girl it feels so good the way you bring out the bad in me, you called me up at work said baby can you come on home im feeling kinda crazy im all alone, and I've got nothing on, tell your boss its an emergency." Ashley smiled at the blonde next to her, she had an amazing voice. Spencer looked over at her best friend and continued singing, moving closer to Ashley, "Cause girl it feels so good the way you bring out the bad in me. You're like a shot whisky to a man that don't drink, just one taste of you girl I can't think straight, im on my knees girl I love your dirty deeds, yeah it feels so good the way you bring out the bad in me." Spencer smiled at Ashley and started leaning towards her, Ashley quickly debated and leaned back.

"Spence, you're drunk." Ashley said, her hand on Spencer's chest, pushing her slightly back.

Spencer shook her head and then nodded her head, "I don't feel good, Ash-" And before Spencer could finish her sentence, she was throwing up on Ashley. Ashley gasped as Spencer quickly moved off of the tailgate to finish puking. Jacob rushed over to Spencer and kneeled down by her, rubbing her back.

"I should get her home." Jacob said looking up at Ashley and back down at Spencer who was defiantly not feeling well.

Ashley stood up, "No I'll take her since I'll be staying with her anyways." She took Spencer's hand and helped her up from the ground.

Jacob stood up and faced Ashley, "You don't even know where she lives."

"Ashley…" Spencer whimpered her eyes shut, she leaned her head onto her shoulder. "Im sleepy." Ashley smirked at Jacob and led Spencer to her car. She put her into the passenger seat and slipped her seatbelt onto her and quickly climbed into the driver's seat. Ashley could not wait until she got to lie down and finally go to sleep.

Once Ashley pulled up to Spencer's dorms, she helped Spencer out of the car, holding her by the waist; she guided the blonde up to her room. She grabbed the keys out of Spencer's purse and quickly opened the door and set the blonde down on the bed and quickly ran back out to grab her duffle bag. Once back in the room, Ashley walked over to Spencer's dresser and pulled out some change of clothes and she helped Spencer change, "Spencer stop laughing." Ashley said getting a little frustrated at the blonde who was making it difficult to put on her shirt.

After Spencer was dressed, she fell asleep in a matter of minutes in her bed. Ashley sighed and went into the bathroom and grabbed a washcloth and soaked it. She walked back over to the bed and sat next to Spencer, cleaning up the debris of puke. Once she finished cleaning up Spencer, she finally got to take a quick shower and change into clean clothes.

When Ashley walked out of the bathroom, she was slipping on her shirt when her eyes caught on something. She walked over to Spencer's desk and she sat down in the chair, she smiled to herself as she looked at herself in a frame. Ashley couldn't believe Spencer framed a single picture of her and put it on her desk where it seems like she looks at it every day. She took a quick glance over at the blonde before opening up the laptop where on the desktop there was a folder named 'Ashley' and she opened it and there were hundreds of pictures of her in the folder. Mostly all of just herself or with Spencer. Spencer was an amazing photographer and Ashley just now saw just how much she loved taking pictures. Ashley closed the laptop and walked over to the bed where Spencer laid, but not before looking at the picture on Spencer's nightstand on her side. It was one of the few where Spencer had gotten brave enough to kiss Ashley on the cheek. Ashley looked at Spencer and smiled softly; she climbed into bed next to her and laid there for a few minutes. Right before Ashley fell asleep, Spencer rolled over and snaked her arm around the brunettes body and sighed in her sleep.

**Okay let's make this like last chapter, if you liked this chapter, review it! The more I get, the better and longer the chapters will be.**


	10. Chapter 10

**Oh wow… ten chapters and only 38 reviews?! I must not be doing something right… maybe I just lost my touch… maybe this chapter will get more people to review and tell me im not a horrible writer. Maybe it's the plot line? Not enough Spashley? I think it's the second one… am I right? Don't worry my fellow readers! Their chance will come… or won't :) hahaha **

**You need to review and tell me what you want to happen! **

**Chapter 10; remember… more reviews = longer, better chapters.**

"_Can we please go? Pretty please?" Ashley begged, clasping her hands together, kneeling on Spencer's bed in front of her. She watched as her best friend shook her head with her hands on her hips, "Spencer! Pleaseeee! I'll love you forever!" Ashley smiled, knowing that telling the blonde that would defiantly work. It's worked since fourth grade and now it was the summer before tenth._

_Spencer's blue eyes lightened, "Why do you do that to me?" She smiled down at the gorgeous brunette who shrugged. "Fine. Let's go." She turned around, grabbing her jacket from the back of the computer chair. The two girls walked down the stairs, quickly saying bye to Spencer's parents. They walked outside and climbed into Ashley's new car, it was a brand new BMW, "Do you have a license to kill?" Spencer asked, obviously scared._

_Ashley climbed into the driver's seat and put on her seat belt and smiled brightly, "It got revoked." She smiled and turned the key and the engine purred. She took a quick glance over at Spencer saw the look in her eyes. They were different than the look on her face. She was scared; she had never ridden with Ashley alone. There was always someone there. She sighed and felt this whirl of protectiveness fall onto her and she grabbed Spencer's hand, "Don't worry, Spence, I'll take care of you." Spencer smiled a smile that only Ashley ever got and she wanted to keep it that way._

_The two girls drove down the back roads, Spencer every so often, grabbing onto something, bracing herself around a turn that Ashley took too fast. Ashley giggled every time, she was doing the speed limit and around the curves, she went a little below the limit just so Spencer would feel safe. But apparently she wasn't doing that good of a job. She decided that going to a party tonight wouldn't be the best so at the stop sign, she turned left instead of right which would lead to Madison's house, the most popular girl in school._

_Spencer noticed quickly and look over at Ashley who looked content with not going, she couldn't read her friend's face, "You do know you turned the wrong way, right?" Ashley nodded, "Okay… why did you do that then?" All Ashley did was smile and glance over at Spencer; she didn't say anything "Is there where you kill me?" Ashley started busting up laughing but didn't say anything more, "Ashley!" Spencer smiled and shook her head, she looked out of the window. She had never been down this road before, it was nice and quiet. They were the only ones on the road._

_They pulled up to another stop sign and the music was playing, country to be exact. It grew on Ashley to listen to it while she's with Spencer which was all the time basically. She even found herself listening to it while she was alone and she just missed her best friend. Spencer continued to look outside, she couldn't see much since it was pitch black, but the street lamp just ahead shined down onto a dirt road. She looked over at Ashley who grabbed her purse from the backseat and took her phone out. Spencer noticed that she had a missed call from Madison but instead of calling her back, she turned her phone off. The blonde raised an eyebrow at Ashley and continued to watch her every move._

_Ashley pulled onto the dirt road and the two girls sat there in a comfortable silence between them until Spencer's phone started to ring, Ashley knew that ringtone too well. Aiden. Spencer reached into her pocket and looked at her phone. She smiled small to herself and hit ignore and followed Ashley's lead, she turned off her phone and threw it in the backseat. Ashley smiled over at Spencer and Spencer returned the gesture, "This is where you kill me isn't it?" She raised her eyebrow again._

_Ashley smiled, "Everyone thinks we're at the party, it's perfect. No one will know that I killed you, wrapped you in some rope, and threw you in the bottom of a lake." _

_The blonde's eyes went wide, "You watch way too many crime shows." She earned a laugh from Ashley. Spencer looked outside, "Oh my god…" Her eyes landed on the lake, the moon shining down onto the rippling water. She turned the music down and rolled her windows down, she could hear the crickets chirping, see the bats fly under the moon, hear the frogs croaking, it reminded her so much of how it was back home, "Ashley…" She looked over at the brunette who grabbed a CD from the center console and slid it into the CD player, soft country music started to fill the car. _

"_Come on, silly." Ashley smiled bright and opened her door and jumped out of the car. Spencer followed her lead and they stood there in front of the car, surrounded by nature, "So tell me," Spencer looked from the lake over to Ashley, "What really gets you about this type of thing?" Ashley motioned towards the surroundings._

_Spencer smiled; this was one of the best moments to come with Ashley. She looked at the brunette, the way the moon hit her face, bounced off her deep brown eyes, she was beautiful, "Everything about it does. It's so much better too with you here to enjoy it with." Spencer smiled at Ashley, never looking away. "And you actually made a country CD, shocking you could sit through all of that just for me." Ashley's smiled beamed, she was very proud of herself._

_Ashley climbed up on the hood of her car, she patted the spot next to her for Spencer to join her, "You can really see the stars from here." Ashley smiled over at the blonde and watched and waited patiently for her best friend to lie down next to her. _

_After a few minutes of silence, Spencer turned to the brunette, "Why'd you do this, Ash? Instead of the party that you're supposed to be at…" She trailed off, playing with the hem of her shirt._

_Ashley laid there, looking up at the stars, "its simple, Spence," She smiled and looked at the blonde, "I'll love you forever." Spencer smiled and rolled over onto her side and wrapped her arms around Ashley's right arm and leaned her head on her inner shoulder._

"_This is perfect, Ashley." She admitted quietly and they laid there together for a couple of hours, just talking and listening to everything happening around the two of them._

Ashley sat at the table, sipping on her morning coffee, looking outside of the window, taking in the beauty of the countryside. The way the trees were almost bare naked, the leaves all on the ground that tumbled within the wind. It was almost as beautiful as Spencer, Ashley thought to herself. She went to take another sip of her coffee when she heard a noise from behind, coming from Spencer. She quickly set her cup down and ran to Spencer's side, rubbing her back as she puked into the trashcan.

"Oh god, where the hell did this come from?" Spencer asked before she puked again, it was clear though and it burned her throat.

"Oh honey…" Ashley said quietly as she brushed some of the hair out of Spencer's face.

"This happened yesterday morning too." Spencer admitted quietly, laying her head down onto the bed, closing her eyes, she didn't want to look at Ashley while she felt so bad.

Ashley sat on the floor next to the bed, still rubbing her back, "Are you getting sick?"

Spencer shrugged, "I dunno… I hope not, I have an exam Monday." Ashley laughed, of course Spencer would be thinking about you. "I'd go anyways." Spencer opened her eyes and smiled. "Can I have some water, Ash?" Ashley nodded and before she got up, she leaned over and pressed her lips to Spencer's forehead to check to see if she had any sort of temperature, she sighed when it felt normal. Spencer smiled to herself when Ashley stood up and walked over to get her a glass of water, "You're so sweet, Ashley." She said quietly when Ashley returned by her bedside and continued on with rubbing her back.

She smiled down at Spencer, "You're worth it, Spence." The blonde smiled at Ashley and took sips of the water; she set it on the nightstand and looked at the picture, freezing because she knew Ashley had seen it. Ashley noticed what she was looking at and giggled, "You're pretty cute, Spencer." Spencer started to blush, "I love that picture." Ashley looked at the picture and smiled, they both looked so happy in it.

"Well I love y-it too." Spencer quickly took another drink from her water and Ashley just smiled at the blonde. She looked down at her clothes and realized that she doesn't remember getting from the lake back to her dorm, "Um… what happened last night?" Ashley started laughing and removed her hand from Spencer's back.

"Um… Spence? You were hammered." Ashley giggled looking at Spencer whose eyes went wide, "But don't worry… you didn't do anything too bad."

"Oh my god…" Spencer leaned up on her elbows and stared at Ashley, "What'd I do?" She looked worried.

"Well I mean, you puked everywhere for starters," Spencer sighed, "And you were all over Carrie again, tried to jump into the lake, we made out," Spencer's eyes went wide once more and her mouth dropped a little, but there was a hint of a smile at the corners of her mouth, something Ashley didn't catch it was so subtle. Ashley laughed, "Okay all of that was a lie, cept you did puke every where and you did try to jump into the lake nude."

"You didn't say nude the first time!" Spencer's face was beat red, she couldn't believe how she acted. Ashley laughed, she was defiantly enjoying this. But she wouldn't dare her that Spencer almost tried to kiss her; she didn't want to freak her out. "So, we didn't really make out?" Spencer asked kind of quietly, disappointed.

Ashley shook her head, "No I didn't feel like competing with Carrie." Ashley laughed nervously to herself, she would have killed to kiss Spencer but she knew that it was wrong. She stood up and Spencer's eyes followed her.

"So you drove me home?" She nodded, "Changed me?" Ashley nodded and sat down next to Spencer, "Helped me through everything?" Ashley nodded once more, "And cleaned me up after it all?"

Ashley smiled and nodded to Spencer, "And I didn't even get mad at you for puking all over me." Spencer hung her head and Ashley laughed quietly and put her arm around Spencer, "Don't worry Spence; I'll still love you forever." Ashley smiled at the Spencer who's smiled ear to ear, a light shade of pink taking over her cheeks.


	11. Chapter 11

_Ashley laid on her bed next to her best friend, Spencer. It was Friday night and since fifth grade, every Friday they would stay the night at one of their houses. It's been two years since that traditional started and it was something they wanted to keep going until college where they had planned on living together. They had become best friends quicker than anything and they were inseparable since. They had everything planned out together. They both couldn't wait until they grew up._

"_When do you want to have kids?" Ashley asked, shoving popcorn into her mouth._

_Spencer looked over at Ashley and raised her eyebrow, "I don't know… maybe when im 25. So im outta college and have my life set on track, ya know?" She smiled over at Ashley, "how about you, Ash?" _

_Ashley shrugged, "I don't want kids. They're annoying." She shoved more popcorn into her mouth and continued to watch what was on the TV._

"_You're just too young to know what you want right now." Spencer laughed and laid back down, "I want three kids; two boys and a girl." She smiled proudly, knowing exactly what she wanted. _

_Ashley laid there smirking because she knew exactly what she wanted, but she just wanted to get Spencer worked up. She found it cute and she just couldn't help getting the blonde frustrated, "You're going to have an alien baby." _

_Spencer's eyes went wide, "That's horrible! No! Im gonna have three normal looking kids!" She said defensively. _

"_Nope, ones going to be a alien baby, another one will have three eyes and four arms with one leg, and the other one is going to hav-" Spencer put the pillow over Ashley's face to get her to stop talking, she laughed as she succeeded until Ashley threw Spencer off of her. The two girls laughed together and continued to watch TV, talking about anything that came to their mind. It didn't matter what was on, they weren't watching it anyways._

"There's something different about you, Blondie." Corey announced over his Starbucks coffee which made Spencer and Annie both looked up from their books and shared a look with each other. Spencer raised her eyebrow, "its Miss California over there isn't it?" Corey nodded towards Ashley who was flirting with the girl behind the counter.

Spencer's eyes went wide and a light shade of pink fell onto her cheeks, but then again, a full rage of jealously fell into the bottom of her stomach and her stomach turned, she looked back down at her book, "No." She mumbled, crossing her arms around her stomach, she felt different but it defiantly wasn't because of Ashley.

"Girl please, you're so smitten with that girl." He smiled over at Spencer and Annie laughed and agreed. "So what are you doing here?" Spencer looked up with a questioning look which made Corey gesture over towards Ashley once more, "Go claim that, piece of ass!" Spencer became even redder and she quickly looked back down at her book.

"She's outta my league anyways, Core." Both of her friends laughed at this comment but Corey became serious.

"She's smitten with you as well, Spencey." He smirked across the table and took another sip as he watched Spencer looked over at Ashley and just stare at her. She tightened her arms around her stomach a bit more and sighed. "Her body language she's giving, Kelly, is sexual." Corey said leaning on his elbows on the table, "But the body language she gives you, she likes you, Girl. There's defiantly something there."

"Spencer could do much better anyways." Annie admitted, tapping her pen against her book.

Corey and Spencer looked over at the red head, "Excuse me? That piece of ass is perfect for, Spencer, girl." Spencer smiled to herself, sitting there listening to her friends bicker.

She looked back over Ashley who happened to look over at her at the same time; Spencer smiled sadly and returned to her book work. There was no way her and Ashley were ever going to get together. There was no way that Corey was right about this. He's wrong sometimes, but usually never. She couldn't even concentrate on her reading anymore because all she could think about was Ashley and Kelly, the brunette from behind the counter, going at it.

But Spencer couldn't take their flirting anymore, she needed to stop it, it was the only way that she was going to feel better. She set her notebook and pen down onto her textbook and walked over to Ashley and snaked her arm her waist, "Babe let's go for a walk?" She reached her hand up to Ashley's face and moved a piece of hair behind her ear. Ashley's eyes went wide and she started to blush hardcore. Spencer looked over at Kelly and smirked at her and slid her hand into Ashley's back pocket and directed her towards the door. She didn't know where that move came from, that surprised the two of them.

As Ashley and Spencer walked passed Corey and Annie, Spencer smiled big to them and Corey knew that was the boldest thing she had ever done since she got here. Once outside, Spencer removed her hand from Ashley's back pocket and her hand instantly became cold and Ashley looked over at her, "What was that about, Spence?" She raised her eyebrow towards her best friend as they walked slowly down the side walk.

"You know, I didn't think this through." She crossed her arms; she wished she had grabbed her jacket.

"Spence."

Spencer looked over at Ashley and she smiled, "Come on," She walked over to her car and grabbed an extra jacket from the backseat and slipped it on.

It was the same hoodie that she had worn at the beach the night before she left. Ashley smiled, "Where we going… babe?" She smirked over at Spencer who blushed.

"She was a whore, Ashley!" They shared a laugh, "I was just trying to save you from getting AIDS!" She said defensively. Ashley didn't say anything more, she left it at that. She knew that Spencer didn't do that just because of that reason, but then again, she didn't want to push her further.

The two girls walked with light chatter to downtown and towards the river. It was a beautiful walk, the beginning of winter breeze blowing, the leaves tumbling and crunching underneath their footsteps. The two girls laughed together just like if it were old times. Cars would pass by every so often, making a gust of cold wind blow into their faces which would send them into bitterness until the car was out of sight. Once down by the river, the two girls sat up on a bench that overlooked the late season fishermen, their boats, the flowing water, and the boat ramp.

Ashley grabbed a few rocks from the ground and she casually threw them into the racing river, "You know what this kind of reminds me of?" Ashley looked over at Spencer who stared down at an old fisherman, re-baiting his hook, "The night on the pier." Spencer looked over at Ashley then and she smiled. "He was such a nice man; I wonder what he's up too." She turned her attention back at the fisherman down below.

"That was a good night." Ashley said quietly looking at the ground for more rocks to grab. Spencer watched as the brunette walked around the bench to gather more rocks to throw into the river. "Even if it was cold and you took far too many pictures of me."

Spencer laughed, "You're gonna have to get used to that if you wanna be a rock star." Ashley froze and looked at her best friend.

"Excuse me? I _am_ a rock star." Ashley smiled proudly and continued to throw rocks into the river below. A silence fell between the two girls and when Ashley was out of rocks, she didn't bother looking for more, she just took her seat once again next to the blonde, but closer than when she first sat down. "Do you miss her, Spence?" Spencer looked at Ashley quickly, not knowing who she was talking about, "Your mom…" she looked at her best friend, waiting for her to answer, knowing this was going to be a really tough subject, but Spencer never opened up about her Mom. She wanted to know everything about her, she only knew her name and how she passed away.

Spencer nodded, "I do." She said in a voice so quiet, it reminded Ashley of a little kid who was scared of admitting something that hurt, "Tomorrow's her birthday actually…" Both girls could feel some sort of tension building up, "I'll be spending it in class doing an exam." Spencer lightly laughed, not moving her eyes from a leaf on the ground. "Do you miss your Dad?"

Ashley was taken back from the sudden change of conversation, "Yeah… but I mean, he wasn't around much so im used to this feeling. You never got to meet your mom… I couldn't handle that. Even though I hate mine." Ashley laughed, trying to lighten the mood she had created.

She nodded, agreeing with Ashley, "I guess."

Ashley wrapped her arms around Spencer and she followed the brunettes' actions. Spencer laid her head against Ashley's inner shoulder, "Your hair smells good."

"Well that's good to know." Spencer laughed pulling away, "Thanks."

"For what?"

"The hug. It was needed." Spencer smiled sadly and looked down at the ground.

Ashley was defiantly concerned with the tone of voice Spencer was using, "What's going on Spencer?" She held onto the blondes hand and waited patiently for a response.

The clouds above moved over the sun and the temperature felt like it dropped ten degrees, the wind picked up and the leaves stirred up and flew across the ground. The old fisherman below finally decided to call it a day until the season changed again; he reeled in his line and packed up his tackle box. His black lab started to bark, excited to finally be leaving. In the distance, a train was signaling it was passing through, the frogs croaked along with the wind in the bare trees.

Spencer didn't look at Ashley, she wrapped her arms across her stomach again, and quietly she told her best friend what the biggest thing that was bothering her, "Im late…"


	12. Chapter 12

To Ashley it felt like the world had stopped spinning, like she was hit by an 18 wheeler. To Ashley, hearing what her best friend had just told her, felt as if her heart was just ripped in two. She sits by Spencer, doesn't say anything and just sits there quietly. She just stares at the blonde who looks uneasy now but Ashley doesn't know what to do or say, "Uh… um… w-who is the f-father?" She finally stumbled out, not wanting to know the real answer. Spencer looks down at the ground, "How long are you?" She watches her best friend shrug.

"Two months?"

And to Ashley, it felt like someone took a knife and stab her in the chest multiple times and then stab her with an even bigger knife right in the heart. "Aiden." She looked at Spencer who was now crying; she watched the blonde put her head in her hands and silently weep. Ashley stayed to herself, knowing that she should comfort Spencer but she couldn't. Not with knowing that Aiden is practically over her best friend and is all about this girl, Morgan.

That's all Aiden could ever talk about anymore, he never mentioned Spencer's name again after he had met Morgan but Ashley couldn't bring herself to telling Spencer, not now, not while she's like this. So she did what she knew was right, she scooted even closer to the blonde and wrapped her arms Spencer who happily returned the gesture. And there they sat, with the sun setting and the cold wind picking up, Spencer cried in Ashley's arms, neither saying a word for ten or fifteen minutes, they just sat there.

"Do you hate me?" Spencer asked pulling away just a little bit to look into Ashley's eyes.

Ashley sighed, she didn't let go of Spencer, "You know my single right?" Spencer nodded with a small smile, "Nothing you ever do or did would ever make me hate you." Spencer raises her eyebrow at her, "I'll love you forever, Spence."

The blonde pulls away a little more, "What does your single have to-" Spencer stops mid sentence and just stares at Ashley who looks like she's going to throw up from being so nervous. "Ash…" She breaths out quietly and she watches the brunette shake her head, "It makes sense now…" She says looking back down at the ground, "You love him too." She says with sadness in her voice, not bothering to try and hide it.

But as she stares at the ground, next to her, Ashley starts singing the song, her song, and it makes Spencer look up and she's instantly mesmerized by the beautiful voice, "And I just wanna show you She don't even know you She's never gonna love you like I want to," She takes a breath and closes her eyes, "You just see right through me but if you only knew me We could be a beautiful miracle unbelievable instead of just invisible." She can't believe what she's doing right now, but she knows that it's the right thing to do, if not now, then she'll never be able to do it, "There's a fire inside of you that can't help but shine through She's never gonna see the light No matter what you do And all I think about is how to make you think of me And everything that we could be." Ashley opens her eyes, "This isn't about Aiden, Spencer." Tears fill her eyes as she looks at her best friend.

And now it was Spencer's turn to become speechless, as her world stops before her, why didn't she ever see it? "For how long…" She asks quietly, her stomach aching with the butterflies.

Ashley looks down at her fiddling hands, "Since the end of the fourth grade." She admits quietly but quickly looks up at Spencer when she took a sharp inhale of breath.

"Why haven't you ever told me?" Spencer swallowed hard, not knowing why she can't just tell Ashley how she felt instead of asking a million and more questions. She takes Ashley's hand, knowing she's scared.

"I didn't want you to freak out. I didn't want to lose you, Spencer." Ashley looked up at the blonde who was inches away from her face, "Im scared, Spence." She says quietly, looking into her deep blue comforting eyes and no where else.

Spencer closes her eyes and her shoulders drop a little bit, this could be everything she ever wanted and more if she told Ashley how she felt. Or she could do what everyone wants her to do, end up with Aiden and start a family. Her heart ached as she thought about that, but when she opened her eyes, she met with the most comforting thing she had ever seen. "I know I tried to kiss you at the party, Ashley." She admits quietly and in return, Ashley smiles, "I wasn't _that_ drunk." She smiles at Ashley but it fades quickly, "I wanted too, Ash. But you pulled away, and that scared me half to death and thanked god I was drunk so I could have something to blame it on." Ashley raised her eye brow at Spencer, "It might have taken me longer than you, but I know how I feel and I know what I want." Spencer cupped Ashley's cheek and drew circles on her cheek with her thumb, "I've wanted you since middle school, Ashley." She leaned a little closer to her, "It was always you and it was never Aiden. That's what everyone else wanted." Ashley's breath became shorter, "I lose my heart when I met you, Ash." Spencer whispered to her best friend before closing the short distance between the two of them.

And both hearts raced, both stomachs went crazy, both didn't know what was going to happen anymore, but they both knew they wanted this. They wanted each other but they both knew it still couldn't happen, not now that Spencer was pregnant with the guy who stood between them for years. But it didn't matter; Spencer kissed Ashley which she had longed to do. Her lips were on fire from the brunettes. She deepened the kiss and Ashley sighed into the kiss; for once she had no control over anything, she let her body be taken over by someone else.

Before either of them was done, Spencer pulled away, breathing deeply. She leaned her forehead on Ashley's but didn't say anything; she closed her eyes and held onto the back of Ashley's neck. A tear escaped Spencer's eye and she hoped that Ashley wouldn't have noticed but she did, she reached up and wiped away the tears that escaped from the blue eyes, "Spencer." She breathed out in a soft voice.

Spencer didn't move, but Ashley pulled away, looking at her best friend, she never knew that Spencer had enough guts to actually do that. She had always pictured herself kissing her first; she never had pictured this moment right here. Ashley moved some hair out of Spencer's face and wiped a tear away that escaped again, she slid her hand under Spencer's chin and lifted it to meet her own eyes, "Don't be scared." Ashley said quietly, more for her than the blonde.

"Im sorry." Ashley looked at Spencer confused, "For not ever telling you how I felt, for kissing you right now," Ashley's body slumped a little and Spencer met with her brown eyes, "For never letting you know that I love you." And she watched as Ashley's eyes filled with tears, "For leaving you in California, I had to get away from you, you were driving my heart crazy." She lightly laughed and Ashley smiled small, "For doing this again." And she closed the distance once again between her and Ashley and they stayed like that for a minute or two before she pulled away.

"Spencer." Ashley breathed out again ever so softly. But that was all she could say, hoping that Spencer would just look into her eyes and read her soul like she usually does.

"Ashley." Spencer slightly smiled and looked up to the sky, she inhaled deeply, "It's snowing." She watched as the first snow fall came down, lightly though, "You can barely see it but look." She pointed out towards the river that was still racing.

"Wish you had your camera?" Ashley smiled as she saw the passion that Spencer had and how happy she was with everything going on. She saw her smile like she hadn't ever smiled before. That was the happy smile she's been longing to see. Spencer nodded, "Spence?" Ashley looked out into the river for a moment before looking back at Spencer and she sighed and interlaced her fingers with the blondes, "This is beautiful."

"It's the first snow fall of the season, so we can't eat the snow." Spencer informed her best friend which caused her too laugh, "But it is beautiful isn't it?" She smiled, never looking away from Ashley. She smiled and she tilted her head, her bottom lip between her teeth, "I've never seen anything like it before." Ashley smiled to herself as her cheeks turned a slight shade of pink.

But the smile disappeared quickly, "There's something you should know, Spencer." The way Ashley had said this made the blonde uneasy again, her smile no longer on her face, "Aiden's been seeing this new girl, Morgan." Spencer narrowed her eyes and tightened her jaw, "It's like you never existed with him, like he never bought you a ring. He's crazy about this girl and it breaks my heart because you are what created him." Ashley looks at Spencer who is looking at the river, her eyes watering, "I met her couple of weeks back… she's beautiful but she has nothing on you." She admits quietly, silently regretting ever bringing this topic up so she stops before she gets herself in a deeper hole.

And so they sit there in silence, with the snow falling around them, the wind still blowing strong, making them both shiver. Their world had started spinning slowly, bringing them back into reality and into the real world once again. "Head cheerleader?" Ashley nodded wondering how Spencer knew that. She was focused on something out on the river but Ashley didn't bother looking out to see what it may be, she kept her eyes on Spencer, "brunette?" Ashley nodded slowly wondering if Aiden had already told her all about Morgan. "Sweet? Funny? Has a good ass?" Spencer looked over at Ashley with tears in her eyes, there would always be a feeling for Aiden no matter what she did or said but Ashley still nodded. Spencer looked back into the river, "Morgan." She said the name quietly and she sighed. "Sounds like the perfect girl for him." She said but what shocked Ashley was the sadness in her voice.

"Are you going to tell him?" Ashley asked quietly, never looking away from Spencer.

"I have to, Ash. It's his kid." She says numbly, wishing that she herself wouldn't have ever slept with Aiden before she left. She was scared of ending up like her mom, not knowing if she's going to live or not when she has the kid. She closed her eyes, wishing she could just talk to her mom about all of this, but she couldn't. She couldn't help but feel guilty because of it all, she just needed someway to escape but she didn't know how. The only thing she knew she needed was to focus on one thing right now, Ashley. Who came two thousand miles just to apologize for not returning a phone call. She laughed which caused Ashley to look at her completely confused, "You're a dork, you know that?" Ashley raised her eye as she watched Spencer stand up. "We should start going." Spencer sent Ashley a smile as she started to walk slowly towards her car.

"Wait how am I a… dork?" Ashley chuckled at Spencer's word choices; she followed Spencer down the road towards the coffee shop.

But Spencer stopped suddenly and grabbed Ashley's hand and interlaced their fingers, "You could have just called to apologize." Spencer smiled to the brunette as they continued to walk.

And then it was Ashley's turn to stop suddenly, "Yeah… but then I couldn't do this." Ashley leaned in and placed her lips on Spencer's once more which caused Spencer's breath to catch and the spontaneous action.

When they pulled away, they walked in a comfortable silence back to the coffee shop. Both of the girls walked together, hand in hand, thinking about everything that was said down by the river, about how both of their lives were changing. Ashley was glad that she had finally told Spencer how she felt, even if it was through a song, she still told her. And all Spencer could think about was how beautiful Ashley was and how bad she wanted to kiss her again. She had longed to kiss her for many, many years, and now she was allowed too without freaking her out.

Today had their up and downs, but today? Today was worth it for both of the girls and they were both happy that it happened the way it did. But secretly, neither of them would tell the other one how scared they were about how it would all end.


	13. Chapter 13

**Im surprised I didn't get like any reviews from the last chapter since they kissed. Hmm. I guess we'll just have to make the story more dramatic? Actually, if you're reading this part instead of just skipping to the story… why don't you all just review this chapter telling me what you want to see happen… or just guess what will happen. I want your input : ) if you don't review… I guess that's fine too. Here's your chapter my fellow readers.**

Spencer woke up today with tears rolling down her cheeks, a sharp pain in her stomach, her heart racing, and her entire body covered in sweat. She had another dream about her mom, a recurring dream she would say if asked about it. It's more of a memory than a dream though, but she can see it as someone else, not as the baby coming into the world. It was the day she was born and the day her mother died in that hospital bed.

She held onto her covers tightly and squeezed her eyes shut as tight as possible, as a familiar hand landed on the middle of her back, rubbing it to calm her down. "I didn't mean too kill her!" Spencer muttered through her tears into the darkness and Ashley who sat beside her.

Ashley didn't say anything; she just continued to sit there, rubbing her best friends back. This wasn't the first time she had been with Spencer when she had this dream, "Im sorry…" Spencer muttered quietly over and over again.

"Shhh… Spencer it's okay." Ashley said quietly leaning close to the blondes' ear. She kissed her cheek and took her thumb to wipe away the fresh tears that escaped from the blue eyes. The blonde tried catching her breath, she nodded as she took a deep breath and let it out slowly and shaky. "Honey, take another deep breath." Ashley whispered to the blonde pulling her in close to comfort her.

And then there they sat, Spencer fell into Ashley's arms and cried. Ashley sat there rubbing her friends back; she thanked God that she was here tonight to be able to comfort Spencer because she knew that if she wasn't then Spencer would be in a terrible mess. They stayed like that for fifth-teen minutes, neither one caring about what time it was or how hard Spencer was crying.

When Spencer finally calmed down, she slowly pulled away from Ashley's arms and looked her in the eyes and she smiled slightly. "Thanks…" She said completely vulnerable, Ashley didn't say anything back, she just nodded. If she tried to say anything back, she herself would cry as well. She knew she had to be strong for Spencer's sake.

After everything was done, Spencer couldn't fall back to sleep, so she let Ashley sleep a little more after arguing with her about staying up with her. She sat there at her computer, fixing photos and organizing the pictures and folders. Before she knew it, the sun had risen and it was time she had to start getting ready for her class at eight that morning. She grabbed a fresh pair of undergarments and her jeans that lay on the back of her computer chair and she stared at Ashley's suitcase where a shirt laid on top of the rest of her clothes. She smiled to herself thinking if she should wear it or not. She glanced over at Ashley who looked so beautiful sleeping and she back at the shirt. She quickly grabbed it and ran into her bathroom where she took her shower.

It was 7:45 when Spencer got out of the shower and she threw on some make-up and ran a brush through her hair, she walked out of the bathroom and looked at Ashley who was still sound asleep. She grabbed a piece of paper and quickly wrote down something and laid it on her pillow next to Ashley. Spencer grabbed her bag and her computer and walked out of the door, locking it behind her and walked to her class where she would have to present her project to the entire class. It was her photography class, where she had an entire slideshow of pictures she had taken of Ashley over the past couple of months. She couldn't wait until she got to show everyone in her class the most beautiful girl who was her best friend or maybe more, she didn't know yet they hadn't talked about the kiss since.

When Ashley woke up, she rolled over to see Spencer but when she wasn't there, she frowned. She grabbed the paper and read it; _Ashley, you looked so beautiful while you were asleep so I didn't want to wake you up when I left. There's some food in the kitchen, you know by now to make yourself at home : ) im in photography class right now, I'll be home around noon. I can't wait to see you then. Love always, Spencer. _Ashley smiled to herself and held the note to her chest; she couldn't believe how in love she was with this girl.

She threw the covers off of herself and went to grab the shirt off of her suitcase which she had laid off to wear today but she smiled to herself when she knew that Spencer had taken the shirt to wear and she was ecstatic about that. She dug into her suitcase and grabbed a different shirt and fresh pair of undergarments and her jeans and hopped into the shower. Once she was out, she wrapped the towel around her head and got dressed, she walked into the kitchen and put a bagel into the toaster and went back into the bathroom to finish getting ready for the day.

After Ashley ate, she sat there at the table, looking outside of the window where a light dust of snow had fallen over night. She had never seen snow before so she was interested at how it felt. But she wanted to experience it all with Spencer. She wondered to herself where her class was and she so badly wanted to go and sit in her class with her like she used too back in highschool when Ashley got bored waiting for her to come over.

She smiled to herself and decided that is what she would do. She looked on the fridge where Spencer kept her schedule and Ashley thanked God once more that Spencer was organized. "Room 217." Ashley said aloud and walked back over to her suitcase and slipped into some shoes, she grabbed her jacket and headed out the door. She walked out of the dorm building and over the pass way to a different building where Spencer's class was held in.

The brunette walked down the hallway, getting closer to Spencer's room and once she got there, Ashley texted the blonde, _Can I join you in class? : ) _Ashley waited a few minutes before Spencer texted her back, _you're already here huh? _Ashley smiled to herself, Spencer knew her too well. She opened the door and everyone in class looked over at the brunette, "Heyy..." Ashley said nervously and made her way over to Spencer where the teacher gave them both weird looks.

"She's from out of town, Sir. Is it alright if she sits in for the rest of the period?" Spencer gave her famous bright smile to the teacher and he couldn't help but smile and nod.

"Well why don't you go next with your project, Miss Carlin?" Her teacher smiled over the blonde who turned a bright shade of red. She couldn't say no to her teacher, but she was nervous about showing her slideshow now that Ashley was actually in the classroom with her.

Spencer cleared her throat, "Um… yeah sure." She didn't dare stare at Ashley who found this amusing. She grabbed her laptop and walked up to the front of the class and plugged it into the projector and she went into her documents and found the file she was looking for. She opened it up and before she hit play, she gave a little background to her slideshow, "Okay um… the person I chose to take pictures of is actually here now." She gave a nod to Ashley who blushed a little bit, she didn't take her eyes of her Spencer, "She's my best friend and some day she'll be so famous and she'll want me to take all of her pictures. She just doesn't know it yet." A few kids chuckled, "Her name is Ashley Davies, and she's the daughter of the famous rock star in Purple Venom, yes. She's simply… amazing." She smiled and looked away from Ashley's deep brown eyes. "Here it goes." She said and she hit play on the computer and her slide show started.

The first picture was of Ashley making a funny face and Ashley laughed and shook her head, the next picture was in black and white, it was just her silhouette and she was on the beach doing a ballet move by the water. The next one was in color and it should how beautiful her eyes were, they were all so breathtaking and it captured every moment of her. Ashley was speech less after the slideshow was finished; it was everyone's favorite slideshow because it was so real and true. It captured someone's true self and she never looked posed.

"So Ashley, how did you like it?" The teacher asked, standing up from his desk.

Everyone in the class looked back and waited for her response, "It was… amazing." She smiled looking over at Spencer who was bright red. "I mean… I knew Spence was good at taking pictures, but I didn't know she was that good. She made every flaw and made it… well good." She chuckled at herself.

Spencer smiled, "Thanks for your input, Spencer you may sit down." And so she did, she sat back down next to Ashley who was smiling so big. Her teacher looked at his watch, "And I believe that's all the time we have today, everyone who didn't present today, be ready to present tomorrow. You're dismissed." And with that said, he sat back down at his desk and started writing a few more things down on a piece of paper.

Everyone packed up their stuff and headed out of the door, Ashley watched Spencer pack herself up and they both stood up and Ashley grabbed Spencer's backpack and put it on which made Spencer give her friend a weird look. "Give me my bag." Spencer laughed and Ashley shook her head and made her way to the door. "Fine, carry it then." Ashley smiled to herself and walked out of the classroom, followed by Spencer.

They made their way back up to Spencer's dorm and they set her stuff down. When Spencer sat down on her bed, Ashley threw a jacket at her, "Put it on." Ashley said smiling, "We're going to look at the snow."

Spencer laughed, "Ash… it's just snow. Plus it's the first snow fall, there's not even enough to do anything with yet." She stared at the brunette who was trying to glare at the blonde but failed miserably.

"Spencer! I wanna see it! And I don't wanna go aloneee!" Ashley whined walking over to Spencer. She knelt down in front of Spencer and grabbed her hands, "Pwease." Spencer shook her head but couldn't help but smile, "Pretty pweassee! Spencer! I'll love you forever!" Ashley smiled but was taken back when Spencer still said no. Ashley raised her eye brow, "Fine. I'll go out there by myself." She stood up and walked towards the door and looked back at the blonde, "And I don't love you anymore."

Spencer laughed again and stood up, slipping into her blue hoodie and walked over to Ashley, "Come on, butt-head." She linked her arm with Ashley's and they walked out of the door, Ashley smiling to herself.

"Push over." Ashley laughed and Spencer shook her head.

"No… I just don't want you to stop loving me." Spencer said smiling as they walked out of the front door of the dorm building and over towards the grass.

Once they walked over to the grass, the snow started falling once more and heavier than before. Ashley smiled, looking up at the sky, watching the snow fall. She looked over at Spencer who was doing to same, but with her tongue stuck out, "What are you doing?" Ashley laughed at her best friend.

"Catching snowflakes on my tongue." Spencer said without looking over at the brunette, "Something I used to do when I was little. But you don't ever do it on the first snow fall." She looked over at Ashley who stared at her with a confused look. Spencer laughed and stuck out her tongue once more and she closed her eyes. Ashley couldn't help but smile at the sight, but she knelt down to the ground and grabbed as much snow as she could and packed it into a ball and she threw it at Spencer who looked shocked, "Ashley!"

The girls laughed together and Spencer pushed the brown haired girl who just smiled and held onto the blonde's hand. They both looked at one another and Ashley pulled Spencer too her and her hand was on the blondes cheek, rubbing it with her thumb. Spencer's breath caught as Ashley got even closer and watched her glance down at her lips. Spencer swallowed hard and let out a shaky breath as her body touched Ashley's. She stared into Ashley's brown eyes and was lost, when Ashley leaned down, she pressed her lips to Spencer's, making both of them close their eyes and take this moment in, hoping to remember this moment for the rest of their lives.


	14. Chapter 14

Ashley walked into Spencer's dorm room and spotted the blonde sitting crossed legged in the middle of her bed, gripping the phone tightly by her ear. She knew who was on the other line and Ashley's heart felt like it was slowly being ripped out of her chest by someone sticking their hand down her throat, grabbing and twisting her newly put together, beautiful heart, and working their way back up her throat to rip it completely out of her chest. She knew that this moment would come sooner or later, but she had wished Spencer was just having a false pregnancy. Spencer wasn't the only one who was scared about everything, Ashley was terrified as well since this is the way Spencer's mom, Paula, had passed away.

She didn't want to be near Spencer while she was on the phone with Aiden because it would just hurt so much more, seeing the way Spencer is slowly breaking day by day because nothing will ever go her way in her life. Spencer is the type of person who just has the worst luck and when they finally have something good go on in their life, something bad comes and screws it up. Ashley was the complete opposite and the blonde had always envied that.

Aiden was on the other line with Spencer; he was sitting on his couch in his dorm room about to leave for a date with Morgan. He had no idea that his life would be turning around, doing a complete 360. He slowly sat down after Spencer had given him the news, Morgan sitting next to him completely worried. He kept shushing her to be quiet because he didn't want his ex to know about his now especially since his ex is knocked up with his child.

The raven haired boy knew what he had to do, he had to take responsibility for his actions, but for some reason, he didn't feel like he wanted too. Spencer had been so back and fourth with him since freshmen year of highschool so when they broke up he felt like he was a completely different man. When he met Morgan that first day of college, he couldn't take his eyes off of the beauty. But there would always be a place in his heart for his first love that he thought about every single day.

"I just don't think right now is the right time, Spence." He said into the phone, Morgan knowing instantly who that was. She was always jealous of the blonde because that's all Aiden could talk about when they first met. Even when he didn't want to talk about the blonde, there would always be a way that she would come up into conversation.

"What do you mean, Aiden? Now is the time. You can't change that." Spencer said into the phone with a shaky voice, Ashley sitting right next to her now, comforting her. Spencer was thankful that Ashley was here but in a way, she wished that it was Aiden that was next to her, rubbing her back as she revealed the life changing news.

Aiden stood up and gripped his phone tighter, he couldn't handle a child right now, his life was going perfectly, "Well I don't think we should go through with this, maybe… maybe we should-"

Before he could finish his sentence, Spencer had cut him off, "Don't! Don't you dare say that, Aiden!" A tear rolled down her cheek, she was upset that Aiden wasn't being so supportive of this.

"It's just a thought, Spencer." He replied quietly and Spencer didn't say anything, "I have to go though, im already late for something so whenever you come back home, if you ever do, we'll talk about it then." Aiden added before hanging up the phone. He sighed and wrapped Morgan in his strong arms, forgetting everything that was just said to him. He looked down at the brunette girl who looked back at him with worried eyes, "I love ya, babe." He smiled and pressed a kiss on her forehead before the two of them walked out of his dorm room to start with their date.

Spencer had started crying, Ashley already knowing Aiden doesn't want to stick around. This wasn't like him though and that made her furious. Her pocket started vibrating and she waited until Spencer had gotten up and went to the bathroom to clean up before checking it. When she opened her phone, it revealed that the text was from Aiden. She raised her eyebrow as she read it; _Spencer's pregnant. _

Ashley didn't know exactly how to react, if she told him that she was here with the blonde, he'd flip because she didn't give him any forewarning. But she loved Spencer more than she had ever loved Aiden so she knew that she had to tell him that she already knew because she's been here with the blonde for a few days now. Something that she couldn't ever tell him though was the fact that they had kissed. That would ruin their friendship for good because you just don't go kissing your best friend's ex-girlfriend.

When Spencer came walking out of the bathroom, she didn't say a single word, she walked over to Ashley who was lying on the bed, leaning up against the headrest. The blonde crawled onto the bed and into the comforting arms of her best friend. She silently cried as Ashley acted like she was watching TV, but the thing that hurt the most was Ashley couldn't do anything. She laid there with Spencer in her arms just thinking up things to make the love of her life happy again but she had no idea what to do.

By morning, Ashley had a plan all together, she woke up extra early and bought two plane tickets back to LA. If anyone could make Spencer happy, it would be her father. She packed everything that they needed, set the suitcases by the door and threw together a quick breakfast. The smell of bacon had woken Spencer from sleeping and she sat up quickly and covered her mouth. Ashley wasn't sure what this reaction was for but she held the spatula in her hand and she quickly became worried as she watched the blonde jump out of the bed and run to the bathroom.

She looked from the bathroom door back to the frying bacon in the pan and frowned a little bit, she knew that bacon was hard to cook for her but she didn't think it was this bad to make the blonde throw up. Ashley set the spatula down on the counter and made her way to the bathroom where she pushed open the door slightly to find Spencer sitting on the floor next to the toilet holding her hair back with hand and the other resting on her stomach.

Ashley kneeled down next to Spencer and started rubbing her back, "Im sorry I suck at cooking." She laughed lightly and to her surprise, so did Spencer.

"No, no. It wasn't your cooking…" Spencer paused for a moment, "It was the smell of bacon." She shook her head as she released her hair from her grip and flushed the toilet.

The two girls continued sitting there, "But you love bacon." Ashley commented taking her hand back and retrieving a wet washcloth for Spencer to wipe her mouth.

"This damn thing doesn't, apparently." The blonde pointed down at her stomach and Ashley laughed and offered her friend a hand up. They made their way back into the kitchen where Ashley covered the bacon smell with some candles, a winter breeze from an open window, and fresh pancakes. "When did you become a chef?" Spencer asked taking a drink of her orange juice.

The brunette laughed and placed three pancakes onto Spencer's plate, "Since my cook quit on me and it was kind of a last resort kind of thing." She smiled brightly down at Spencer who looked at her with amusement.

Spencer tilted her head, something she was famous for. She gave Ashley a smile and poured syrup onto her food, "What's the occasion anyways?" Her blue eyes locked with Ashley's deep brown eyes.

"We're going back to California-" She stopped when Spencer dropped her fork onto her plate, "What's wrong?" She asked quickly.

Spencer shook her head, "Why are we going back there? I don't want to see, Aiden." She said thinking that Ashley was just taking her back to talk to Aiden. She didn't want anything to do with him and he didn't want anything to do with Spencer which was shocking to both her and Ashley because since he had met the blonde, that's all he ever wanted, was Spencer.

"Spence no, we're going to visit your dad." Ashley said softly across the table from the blonde who looked at her sternly. "I mean… we don't have too…" She trailed off, suddenly finding a lot of interest in the food in front of her.

"Why though?"

Ashley looked up; she didn't think Spencer would be so against on going back to LA, "You need him, Spencer. There's only so much I can do for you until your dad needs to take over." She said quietly, taking a bite of her bacon. She looked at Spencer when she didn't say anything, "I just thought it was a good idea. We can cancel the entire thing."

The blonde sighed and took another bite of her pancakes, "No Ashley, it is a good idea, thank you." She said but Ashley couldn't pick out the tone in her voice. That right there bothered her alone.

Before long, the two girls were driving to the rental car place by the airport. They dropped off Ashley's car and waited for the shuttle bus to come and pick them up to take them over to the terminal. They were mostly quiet from the entire ride until they got onto the plane where Spencer looked really uneasy. Ashley wanted to ask why but she felt like she shouldn't bother. She watched as Spencer looked around at her surroundings frequently and she played with the hem of her shirt.

Ashley couldn't help but smile small at Spencer who was silently freaking out about the plane. When the captain announced that they were about to take off, Spencer stiffened and pressed herself against her seat, trying to disappear. Ashley raised her eye brow and Spencer didn't dare look anywhere but at the back of the seat in front of her. When the plane started moving, building speed quickly, Spencer shut her eyes tightly and grabbed Ashley's hand and gripped her hard. Ashley laughed quietly and shook her head; she brought the blondes hand up to her mouth and placed a kiss on the back of the hand.

When Ashley pulled up to an old familiar house, after a short hour and a half drive of listening to nothing but Country, even when Spencer had fallen asleep, she smiled knowing that this was the right thing to do for the blonde. She put the car in park and turned it off, she looked over at the sleeping beauty in the passenger seat and her smile widen. She bent over and pressed a kiss on the blonde's forehead, "Wakey wakey, beautiful."

Before Spencer opened her eyes, her face lit up with a bright smile, "I wasn't asleep." She defended herself even though she and Ashley both knew that she was asleep.

"Okay honey, whatever you say." Spencer looked over at Ashley and then at the house in front of her. "You ready?"

"Ready as I'll ever be."

The two girls got out of the car and grabbed their bags and headed for the front door. Spencer wasn't sure if she should just walk on in or stand outside and wait for somebody to come open the front door. Even though it was her house, it was also ten o'clock at night. She pressed the door bell and within seconds, the door flew open and Spencer was engulfed in her fathers' arms where she had broken down.

Earlier that day, Ashley had called Arthur letting him know that they were coming down that evening and that Spencer was a complete mess. She didn't tell him about the pregnancy though, that was something that Spencer would have to tell him, but she would defiantly be there to support her.

Ashley had let the two Carlin's talk about everything they needed too within a few minutes after coming to the house. She had hopped into the shower and she quickly went to sleep, never knowing exactly when Spencer came to bed. But she knew that when Spencer did come to bed, Ashley was awake enough but asleep enough to say nothing to the girl. She laid there, hearing Spencer come into the room and open up her bag and she felt the bed move when Spencer had settled down next to the brunette. She smiled into the dark room when Ashley felt Spencer's arm snake around her torso.

Spencer, unlike Ashley, fell asleep quickly now with Ashley by her side. But before she fell asleep, she replayed the entire pregnancy conversation she had with her father a few minutes before.

"Spencer, how… why?" Arthur didn't know that this was coming; he didn't know how to handle it. He knew how to handle it when other girls his daughters' age had told him about them being pregnant, but he never thought about Spencer coming to him in the middle of the night to tell him that she was pregnant.

A tear had rolled down Spencer's cheek, "Im so sorry daddy…" She was engulfed by her fathers' arms once again as she let the tears escaped once more. "He doesn't want any part of it either." She mumbled into Arthurs shoulder. She felt her dad tense up, he didn't say anything though, "He wants me… to…" She cried harder, "I can't do that, daddy." She pulled away from the strong arms she had known from her entire life.

Spencer watched her father stand up and take a deep breath, he turned and looked at her, "What do you want to do, Spencer?" He asked softly, taking his seat again.

"I want to keep it." She admitted quietly and she felt a hand on her shoulder. She looked up and to her surprise she saw her father smiling at her.

Arthur nodded his head, "I'll have a talk with, Aiden, sweetheart."

But Spencer shook her head, "No. If he doesn't want a part of his child's life then fine, he won't have any part of its life or mine." She wiped the tears away and looked into her fathers eyes.

"Spencer, he's terrified of this. Of course he's going to tell you he doesn't want any thing to do with the child or you. He's found someone new, honey and he doesn't want to screw it up. His college life, his basketball, he's completely self-centered." The two Carlin's shared a laugh, "But deep down, everyone knows that he wants to be apart of your life, his child's life and no one can change that." He told his daughter quietly, "He's a boy, Spencer. He won't become a man until he holds that precious baby in his arms for the first time." He held onto Spencer's hands and tears filled his eyes, "Your mom never got that chance with you, why not give Aiden that chance of holding his kid." He added quietly before getting up and wiping away the tears before Spencer could see them fall.

Spencer sat there, she knew that her dad was right, she had never thought about it that way. "Thank you dad." She said making him turn around and give her a genuine smile, "Im going to get to sleep though," She placed a kiss upon his cheek, "I love you." She said making her way to the stairs before calling out to tell him goodnight.

Right now, Spencer couldn't believe that this was her life that she was living. It felt like someone else's and she so badly just wanted to trade back lives. But she knew that if she did that, she would have never kissed Ashley and she would have never found the cure to sleeping well again. Ashley. Ashley was the only good thing in her life right now and that was all that mattered to the blonde. She didn't seem happy to Ashley, but she was completely happy because Ashley was the girl she got to fall asleep next to, wake up to see, and kiss whenever she wanted now after waiting years on end. Right now, Spencer was happy but scared at the same time.


	15. Chapter 15

It was at the super market when everything turned, when the air shifted, when everyone ran into each other turning the corner down through the frozen food section. Morgan and Ashley shared a look between one another while Aiden and Spencer were doing the same. It was when Spencer looked from Aiden's eyes to his arm which was around the brunettes' waist, her mouth completely went dry. It was when Aiden looked at Ashley's finger that was in Spencer's belt loop, he was filled with anger and jealously. It was when Ashley's eyes became wide and her heart dropped to the pit of her stomach when everyone looked from Spencer to her.

Brown eyes were shut quickly and many different thoughts ran through her head. Spencer's eyes became misty, "So this is why you didn't want any part of this?" She motioned towards her stomach while Ashley took her hand back from Spencer's body.

Aiden quickly removed his hand from Morgan's waist and exchange looks between his best friends, "This is where you ran off too? To confess your love to my ex-girlfriend?"

He stared at Ashley sternly and before Ashley could reply, Spencer did, "Don't you even dare, Aiden. Don't you even try to turn this around on her running; this has nothing to do with her. At least she cared about me and is sticking by my side through everything." Spencer's voice was raising and became shaky quick.

Morgan stood by the trio awkwardly; she had no idea what to do or what she even got into. She looked at Spencer, she was completely gorgeous even she knew that, "Spencer, are you really going to believe anything Ashley tells you?" Ashley's heart sunk even more, if possible, hearing those words coming from her so called best friend. "She sleeps around with anyone ju-"

"Take that back!" Ashley took a step forward; it was time for her to stand up for herself. "I would treat Spencer better than you could ever treat her, keep her smiling every day, pick her up when she's down, and surprise her with her favorite flowers randomly. I'd do everything you couldn't do and the things you did even better." Ashley gritted her teeth, her breathing a little uneven.

Spencer put her hand on Ashley's shoulder, she knew that Ashley could do everything better than Aiden ever could. She's always known that, but what she hasn't known always was the way Ashley loved her. "In the matter of time I was gone, Aiden, you completely changed to a different person." A tear rolled down Spencer's cheek as she looked at her child's father, "The Aiden I knew would have stepped up the second I told him I was pregnant and came running to me to help and comfort me. The Aiden we knew," She gestured to both her and Ashley, "he would have never treated his friends that he loved and cared for." She shook her head and grabbed Ashley's hand and pulled her away.

It was then at the meeting in the frozen food aisle that everyone's world changed. Once outside, the two girls climbed into Spencer's car and no words were exchanged. Nothing was said between the two, the music was blaring through the speakers of the car, not the usually country music either, this time it was Ashley's kind of music. Rock and roll. Spencer didn't know any of the words to the songs, but neither of the girls sung along to it anyways but Ashley was one who was glad the blonde choose this music to blare for once.

When Spencer turned and pulled down onto this gravel road that seemed so familiar is when Ashley spoke the first words, "Are we going to the lake?" She asked quietly; turning down the music and switching it back to country.

Spencer didn't speak; she nodded her head which saddened Ashley a bit because she missed the sound of the blonde's voice. But instead, she turned the music back up to where it vibrated through the seats and the windows and within minutes, Spencer and Ashley found themselves singing along to the music and smiling again, sharing laughter when Ashley would change her singing into scream-o and ruin the mood of the song or when Spencer would sing off key more than usual but neither minded because this moment they both knew that they were both truly happy.

After the car was parked next to a big oak tree, the girls quickly jumped out of the car, "Spencer!" Ashley exclaimed looking up at the sky, standing in the middle of the road with her arms out, leaning her head back and spinning around in a circle, "It's snowing." She went back to her normal stance and gleamed at her best friend who was staring at her with amusement.

"Ashley, we're in California. That's not snow… that's air." Spencer giggled as she walked over to Ashley. She stood there in front of the brunette and looked into her eyes deeply, "At the store…" Spencer started quietly and Ashley grabbed the blonde's hands and gave them a quick squeeze for support, "Was Aiden right? When he said you came out there… to um… confess your … um…" She sighed heavily and looked away from Ashley, "Nevermind." She mumbled, obviously frustrated with herself.

She started to walk off but Ashley pulled her back into her, without saying any words, Ashley placed her hand under Spencer's chin and lifted it up, making Spencer look into her deep brown eyes. Without any words exchanged, Spencer's breath caught with the light touch of Ashley's hand, she brought her own hand up to her face and placed it over Ashley's hand and closed her eyes as she leaned forward, following Ashley's actions and they kissed passionately.

_It was in 7__th__ grade when Ashley and Spencer held hands for the first time, neither one of them thinking much of it at the time, but both of them knowing that it felt good, it felt right and neither one of them wanted to stop holding hands. Usually girls don't hold hands when they are portrayed to be straight which both girls were seen as. But it didn't matter to them that night, out with their friends._

_That night, they wanted to be different and be happy while in others presence. It was a sleepover over at this girl, Rachel's house and there were six girls there total. They had played truth or dare, cards, would you rather, and many other games. That night when Rachel's mom told them it was time to go to sleep, they put in a movie and laid down to go to sleep. Ashley and Spencer laid down next to each other and Ashley grabbed Spencer's hand while they watched the movie, it was something that meant a lot to Spencer even then because it showed her just how much the brunette cared for her._

_The blonde laid her head on Ashley's shoulder half way through the movie because she became sleepy very fast. They both wanted everyone to disappear so that they could be alone together, but neither of them would actually tell the other that. They were just happy and content that night and after that night, the next morning they were found in each others arms. No one thinking of it though, everyone just saw the two as being just that close of friends which didn't bother either of them._

_The next night, Ashley was staying over at Spencer's house, much like she did on the weekends which didn't seem to bother anyone. It got to the point where neither girl had to ask their parent, it was just done and expected. Whenever they weren't together, everyone thought that they were in a fight or something happened. They were in the blondes room, listening to music and laying on the bed when Ashley started talking about her kissing some boy earlier that day and for some reason that bothered Spencer and Ashley knew but she didn't know why she would keep telling her these things._

"_Was he good?" Spencer would ask plainly, with no expression or feeling in her voice._

_She would watch Ashley shrug and tell her no and pick out all of the reasons, "I don't think I liked it much actually." Ashley didn't look over at Spencer who had no idea what she was talking about, "But anyways, wanna go swimming?" She jumped up off of the bed and smiled big at Spencer who didn't argue back with the brunette because she didn't want to listen about Ashley kissing some other guy._


	16. Chapter 16

**A slightly longer chapter because I got like, one more review than usual. Keep em coming!**

Days passed and Spencer was found in her room most of the time working on papers that would have to be turned in whenever she got back to Arkansas but for now, she was enjoying being back home. Her brothers had come home for a nice little family dinner but sadly since Ashley was back in town, she had to go back to working on her music. She was all Spencer could ever think about now a days which she didn't mind one bit. She loved thinking about the brunette but she couldn't help but think about Aiden either. He was her baby's father and all but something else was different about him. She racked her brain for anything that was said about him or just for anything in general. But she couldn't place her finger on it which bothered her. She needed to talk to the raven haired boy and straighten everything out for once and for all.

The blonde picked up her phone off of her bed and dialed the number she knew by heart and waited as the other line rung, she started to get impatient because it seemed like it was ringing for what seemed like forever. When Aiden's voicemail came along, she debated quickly on whether to leave him one or not and when the beep came, she quickly said, "Hey Aid it's me, Spencer. I need to talk to you like adults before I leave. Call me back." And she hung up, tossed her phone onto her bed again and took her seat in her desk chair once more.

She tapped her pencil on her notebook where she was writing down an outline for an essay that was due next week, always a step ahead of the game. There was a beep indicating that Spencer had just received a text and she scrambled onto her bed and grabbed her phone, it was from Jake and her heart raced, _Hey Spence… heard you're back in Cali… I miss you. Come home soon. _The message made Spencer smile, she couldn't help it, she had a thing for cowboys, _I miss you too Jake, I'll be back some time next week for finals. _Was all she wrote back to the boy and within seconds of sending the message; she received a reply, _whenever you get back I'll take you out to dinner. Sound good?_

See, the thing was with Jake and Spencer was that she wasn't sure she wanted to be with him. Sure he made her smile and feel things that she only ever felt with Ashley but she didn't feel exactly like she did with her which she loved that feeling. She couldn't say yes but then again, she couldn't tell him no so all she did was reply with a "maybe" and she never got a text back. Her heart ached and she became queasy at the smell of her father making breakfast for dinner. She quickly ran into the bathroom and Arthur heard the door slam and walked over in concern.

He lightly knocked on the door, "Honey? You okay?" He waited for a reply but all he heard was his daughter puking which upset him. He hated seeing any of his kids sick, but this was a different kind of sick which he wasn't sure how to handle. The older man closed his eyes and looked up, praying to Paula to help her daughter get through all of this without any medical concerns and to help her get through the pregnancy without any problems, a smooth sailing and to also help him because for once, he didn't know how to handle this situation.

The door opened and Spencer was wiping away a few tears and holding her stomach before Arthur embraced her in his big arms, "Daddy, it was bacon." They shared a moment of laughter together and he agreed to throw out the bacon and cover the smell with pancakes which made Spencer happy. She asked permission for Ashley to come over because this was one of her favorite meals to eat, breakfast for dinner.

Spencer hurried to her room and grabbed her keys and phone before heading out of the door and drive down to Ashley's house. It was a short drive, about 10 ten across town. She pulled up and parked outside of Ashley's loft and ran up to the building, pulling open the door and running over to the elevator, she was really happy to see Ashley and surprise her which she won't get to do once she leaves.

Once she was at Ashley's door, she grabbed the spare key from underneath the mat and unlocked the door. Spencer didn't see the brunette anywhere but could hear a guitar playing from the back bedroom; she smiled to herself as she tiptoed towards the room. She peeked into the room and saw the brunette sitting on the edge of her bed in an old t-shirt that used to be owned by Spencer herself and she wore shorts that shouldn't have been considered shorts, they were more of underwear.

Spencer smirked to no one in particular as she leaned against the door frame, the spare key still in hand. She listened to Ashley sing the words to a new song, make a frustrated noise when it didn't come out just right. She listened to the girl in front of her strum against the guitar and let the music fill the room. She watched as Ashley stopped playing and singing and crossed something out on the paper that laid on the bed in front of her and listened to her hum something new. Spencer cleared her throat which made Ashley jump because she was so intently into her music she didn't expect anyone to come over and interrupt her.

Spencer walked over to the girl, "I've told you a thousand times to not leave your spare key under your door mat." She held the key up to the girl who was beat red and was still holding onto her chest above her racing heart.

"Well…" Ashley laughed and shook her head, "What are you going to rob me of?" She eyed the blonde as she sat down behind her and wrapped her arms around her waist, resting her chine on the brunettes shoulder.

"I think you're the robber here," Spencer smiled and placed a gentle kiss on the brunettes cheek, "I don't know where my heart is." Hearing this, Ashley grinned and turned a little bit to place a passionate kiss on the blondes' lips. "Play me this." Spencer demanded in a sweet voice, pointing to the paper that lay in front of both of them now.

Ashley shook her head and placed her guitar back in its case and returning back to the bed where Spencer still sat, "You have to wait." She smirked, raising her eye brow at the blonde. "I want some more kisses." She requested as she lightly pushed Spencer back onto the bed where she climbed up onto her, kissing her extremely passionately.

This caught Spencer off guard and lost all of the breath she had and she sighed into Ashley which made her push her body into the blondes to get another reaction from her, but it wasn't the one she wanted. Spencer pushed Ashley off of her and smiled sweetly, "I can't Ash… I mean… I want too. Trust me, I do." She laughed lightly staring down at the comforter and Ashley took Spencer's hand.

"I know… im sorry." But she honestly didn't know.

"I came over to ask," Spencer looked up at Ashley and into her deep eyes, "if you wanted to come over…" She swallowed hard, "Um… for uh…" And suddenly she forgot what she came over for; all she knew was that she missed Ashley's lips.

She knew that she wouldn't be able to see the girl for the longest time so she wanted to take advantage of this situation right now, she pressed her lips against Ashley's which took both girls by surprise but neither stopped it. Spencer's hands were lost in the brunette's hair and Ashley's hands traveled along the blonde's body and when she got to her stomach, she knew why Spencer couldn't do this.

Ashley pulled away, clearly upsetting Spencer, "Spence im sorry…" She took her hands back slowly from Spencer's stomach and the blonde watched her. "It's just… um…" She hung her head and she heard Spencer sigh. "Aiden." Ashley shook her head which broke Spencer's heart. She had no idea why Ashley had to stop because of him.

"I don't love him anymore, Ashley." She said quietly but obviously frustrated, "In fact, that was lust. This," Spencer motioned between the two girls, "This is love." She placed her hand on Ashley's face and lifted it up so Ashley would look at her.

But nothing was said between the two, Ashley just simply couldn't do this with Spencer after all of these years waiting and hurting. She watched Spencer and Aiden kiss and make out, do all of that couple stuff and the lovesick stuff. Ashley's heart broke a little, she couldn't do this to Aiden, and Spencer was still in love with Aiden no matter how much she said she wasn't. She was having his child and Ashley felt guilty for even kissing the blonde, no matter how much she forced the thought out of her mind.

Her heart would always be broken, shattered in a million little pieces because of him. She wouldn't ever fully have the heart of Spencer Carlin, no. Whenever Spencer has this child, that's all she's going to see when she looks at it. Aiden. And frankly, Ashley doesn't want to hurt anymore but she also doesn't have the heart to tell her that.

"My dad is making breakfast for dinner; I thought you'd want to come." Ashley heard Spencer say this after a long moment of silence and she thanked god that she did.

She smiled big, "I'd love too. I'll meet you in your car? I want to change and freshen up a bit." Ashley replied, standing up from her bed and placing a kiss on the girls' forehead. Even though she wanted to tell Spencer what was going on in her head, she didn't want to give her any ideas that something was bothering her.

Whenever Spencer left the loft, Ashley quickly grabbed her phone and dialed Aiden's number who picked up after the third ring, "What Ashley?"

"You're a fucking idiot, Aiden." She said into the phone, grabbing the pants she wore the night before, "Are you not going to be here for her?" She breathed with venom across the line.

Aiden was sitting in his car, he had just dropped off Morgan at her house after their date, "Ashley I can't. She doesn't love me, she never has." He said and Ashley picked up on his tone. She knew that Aiden was still very much in love with Spencer.

"Aiden! She is pregnant with your fucking kid." Ashley looked into the mirror and fixed her make-up, "She needs you Aiden, and I can't be the replacement of a father. Spence and I both know that the kid needs two parents, a mother and a father, I can't do that." Ashley said sadly into the phone. She closed her eyes, she so badly wants to be there for Spencer but it's not her job.

"Ashley… I just…" Aiden took in a deep breath, "Fine, I'll admit that I still love her. Seeing her at the store brought back all of those feelings." He let out a shaky breath and Ashley let him continue, "I couldn't believe that she was pregnant. We used a condom, we did everything we were supposed too." He shook his head and hit the stirring wheel, "Fuck! I can't be a father, Ashley. I just can't. I have everything going in my life right now, everything I ever dreamed of going just how I planned."

"Cept for Spencer isn't in the picture where she should be." It broke her heart to say it, but it was true. Or so she thought.

"You love her Ashley, we both do. We've both always loved her but she only loves you. She's always loved you more than she loved me. She'd hold your hand more than she'd hold mine." Aiden laughed at a memory that brewed up in his mind.

_It was normal that the three friends would go out to a movie twice a month; they spent many Friday nights together at the movie theaters instead of at some party. It was a time when the movie ended and they walked out of the theaters and Aiden went to grab Spencer's hand and she pulled away and grabbed Ashley's hand. It always kind of bothered Aiden because he knew that Ashley liked Spencer and he felt threatened by her especially since Spencer knew that Ashley was gay._

"_Why don't you hold my hand?" Aiden stopped, "You held onto hers the entire time during the movies!" He said with a light laughter._

_Ashley smirked, "Oh Aiden, are you jealous?" Spencer smiled when Ashley placed her hand in the blondes back pocket._

_Aiden narrowed his eyes on Ashley and she knew that she shouldn't have done that because they had actually had this conversation to where they discussed their feelings for the blonde who was just completely lost with her feelings between her two best friends. "Yeah Aid, jealous?" Spencer raised her eye brow, thinking that this is all a joke and wrapping her arms around Ashley's neck._

_Both Spencer and Aiden saw the way Ashley's look changed in her eyes, she became nervous and scared and she so badly wanted Aiden to just disappear so she could kiss the blonde. "Actually… I think you guys should kiss." _

"_Okay." Was all Spencer said and both Ashley's and Aiden's eyes went wide as Spencer leaned closer to Ashley. The brunette stood frozen, her hands still in Spencer's back pockets as she received a kiss on the cheek from the blonde._

_After that, they continued to walk but Spencer went and grabbed Aiden's hand because he looked hurt about what had just happened. But she texted Ashley as the trio walked over to the Starbucks, _So I've noticed that you're blushing : )_ Spencer watched Ashley closely when she read the text, she saw that Ashley's cheek turned an even darker shade of red. She quickly replied, _Shut up. I can't help it that I do this when such a Pretty Girl like you does something so sweet.

_And then it was Spencer's turn to blush and she dropped Aiden's hand once they got into Starbucks and held onto Ashley's and all Aiden did was shake his head and order drinks for him and his best friends. He pushed the threatened feeling aside for the night because the look Spencer had was that she was fully and completely happy with herself right now and he didn't want to ruin anything with his jealously for once. But that didn't mean that he still wouldn't have to talk to Ashley later about stealing his girlfriend's heart._

"Fine, Ash, I'll talk to her." Aiden said before he hung up the phone. He knew that he needed to stand up for what had happened, but he didn't want to believe that any of this was actually happening. He didn't want to lose Morgan either but he knew that his heart was always going to be with his first love, even if he didn't have his first loves heart. So he did what was right, turned the car around and started to drive towards Spencer's house where he would make everything better.


	17. Chapter 17

At the table, everyone seemed so happy except Spencer which Ashley had noticed. She placed her hand on the blonde's leg and leaned over to her and asked if she was feeling okay but Spencer swore up and down that she was perfectly fine, that nothing was wrong. But Ashley wasn't stupid; she knew that something was bothering the girl. It was something she knew since she was in love with this girl. The brunette didn't mind much though; she liked knowing when something was wrong with the blonde. She cared so much for Spencer, it was ridiculous.

In the middle of dinner, there was a knock on the door and Ashley's heart fell to her stomach as she watched Glen get up and go answer the door. He was really protective over his little sister and since Aiden didn't stand up for his problem when he should have, Glen wasn't very happy with the boy who now stood in front of him.

The entire house became quiet and awkward when everyone saw who stood on the other side of the door. Ashley felt Spencer tense up under her hand, she could tell Spencer didn't want to see Aiden although everyone knew that they had to see each other at some point in time. "Aiden." Glen said through gritted teeth, blocking the doorway so the dark haired boy couldn't get any closer to Spencer.

"Hey Glen, is Spencer here?" He asked just to ask because he could see Spencer from where he stood.

Arthur could feel all of the tension that was created in the room when Aiden came but being Arthur and a good host; he stood up and asked Aiden to sit down for something to eat. Aiden never refuses Arthurs food so whenever he did now, everyone was shocked, "I just need to talk to Spencer…" He said quietly not wanting to explain why he wasn't hungry because that would result in telling everyone that he was just on a date with another girl.

"You may speak with her after dinner. You may sit down and join us or wait patiently in the living room, Mr. Dennison." Arthur said sternly still very upset with the boy.

Everyone watched him walk into the next room and heard the TV turn on, he was obviously still very comfortable here. The table was still extremely quiet and dinner was just about over but no one moved. "So Lakers lost again." Glen announced and broke the ice, he was always good at that.

After dinner, Ashley and Spencer sat there while everyone else cleared the table, "You okay, Spence?" Ashley asked her quietly, grabbing a hold of her hand underneath the table.

"No. I don't want to talk to him." She admitted to Ashley, "I just want to be with you." She smiled slightly at the brunette, "You make me feel things no one else does, Ash." Ashley couldn't help but smile at the girls words, "I um… I really um…" Spencer tried to say the next part of her little speech but it was rudely interrupted by Aiden.

"Spencer?" Both Ashley and Spencer looked over at the boy and Ashley quickly dropped Spencer's hand which bugged her. "Can we talk outside?" He smiled at her slightly but knew that he shouldn't be here. He never had Spencer's heart, everyone knew that but what he was doing was going to be the right thing to do.

Spencer stood up and started to follow Aiden out to the back deck but Ashley announced that she was going to head home so instead of walking out with Aiden, Spencer turned around and decided to Ashley out while Aiden waited patiently in the living room once more but he had the view of the two girls that everyone knew were so madly in love with one another.

"Im sorry about how tonight is turning out to be." Spencer said sadly as she leaned up against Ashley's car, taking a hold of her hands and bringing the brunette closer to her.

Ashley wasn't sure what to do at this close proximity, "It was fun. Till he came along." She lightly laughed, "What were you trying to say earlier, Spence?" She asked looking deep into the blue pools in front of her.

But the blonde shook her head, "It was nothing important, really." She let out a long breath that she didn't even know she was holding and stared at the ground.

Ashley took a step closer to where there wasn't anymore room to move and placed her hand under her chin and lifted the girls face up to look at her and without saying anything, they communicated with their eyes like they used to do whenever they were younger when words were lost. Spencer started smiling and slid her arms around Ashley's neck and pulled the taller girl down into a deep passionate kiss which surprised Ashley. She pulled away momentarily and she could feel Aiden's eyes on her, burning through her skin at what just happened.

"Goodnight, Spencer." Ashley smiled as she made her way to the driver side of the car and hoped in, watching Spencer walk back towards the house. Once at the doorway, the blonde turned around and waved at the brunette who was pulling away. It was something small that had always happened with those two since their teenage years.

Once back inside, Aiden and Spencer went out to the back porch and sat down in the lawn chairs and sat there in silence for a few minutes. Neither of them knowing exactly what to say, how to start the conversation. "You look good." Aiden said after a while of awkward silence. There used to never be an awkward silence between the two of them, but ever since Spencer moved away, everything changed.

"Likewise." Spencer replied making both of them laugh, "So, why'd you want to talk to me anyways?" She asked not looking at Aiden, just playing with the hem of her own shirt.

Aiden sighed and looked up from his hands, "Are you really pregnant?" He asked and watched the girl in front of him nod, "How though?"

This question earned a forced laugh from Spencer, "I don't know Aiden, it just happened. Maybe because the condom broke and you didn't bother telling me?" She finally looked over at Aiden with cold eyes.

He looked back down at his hands, it was true, he didn't tell her that it broke, "I thought you were on birth control so it didn't matter." This had earned another forced laugh from Spencer, "But it doesn't matter, Spencer. I want to stand up for what happened; I want to be there for you." Spencer stared at the boy in front of him, "I want to be there for our baby." He said the last part with tears in his eyes which pained Spencer. She had never seen Aiden cry over something like this, only once when she found out he had cheated on her at some party.

But something didn't quite add up, "Did Ashley call you and tell you to say that?" Aiden didn't say anything, "See Aiden, look. You can't even do this yourself. You need someone else to push you to do the right thing." Spencer was clearly upset that Aiden couldn't do this for himself and then again, she was upset that Ashley didn't want any part of her and the baby.

"No Spencer listen," He got up and kneeled down in front of Spencer, "I want to be apart of this child's life. Give it something that you didn't have Spence, two parents." He took her hands in his as a tear rolled down his cheek, "Please just give me this chance…" They sat there quiet for a few minutes before Spencer nodded and decided that she should give her child a chance for two parents knowing that she missed that.

"I know you love her, Spencer." Aiden said taking his seat again, glancing for moment at his ex.

Avoiding eye contact, Spencer admits quietly, "I do, Aiden. I love her a lot. I've always loved her…" Saying the last part so quietly, Aiden barely understood what she had said.

Aiden looked over at Spencer fully now, "I know." He took her hand in his and they sat there until it was too cold to sit outside any longer. Aiden went home after that to deal with stuff with Morgan and they decided that they would sit down tomorrow before Spencer left to go back to Arkansas and finish dealing with the whole baby ordeal.

By morning Ashley was a complete nervous wreck, she knew that Spencer was leaving today and she so badly wanted to give up her music career, her everything to just follow the blonde back south. The brunette was sadden by the fact that she didn't exactly know when she'd see the love of her life again, knowing that she was about to go on her first tour across the country. She hadn't yet told Spencer this because she was scared the blonde would be mad but she knew that she was just thinking crazy because Spencer had always been Ashley's number one supporter.

So Ashley grabbed her keys and walked out of her front door finally, a half an hour late as is. She pulled up into the Starbuck's parking lot and hopped out and walked freely into the coffee shop and ordered her usual drink. Turning around to a familiar voice, she spotted a certain red-head that she knew way too well; she was probably Ashley's longest relationship ever. "Well, well, well. Look what we have here." The red-head said walking up to Ashley and running her hand down her arm, freezing Ashley in her stance. "I haven't seen you in a long time," She added, her eyes smiling up at the rock star.

Ashley swallowed hard; she didn't know what to do, "Yeah I've been pretty busy with my music and stuff." She smiled; completely mesmerized by the hazel eyed beauty that stood in front of her, the first girl of many firsts to put it correctly.

"Sit down for a bit?" The red head gestured towards the table that she was occupying earlier before Ashley decided to walk back into the girls' life.

But Ashley couldn't help but smile at her, "I'd love that, Macy."

Spencer paced around the front porch of her house, looking at her phone to check the time, "Spencer honey we need to leave now if you don't want to miss your flight." Arthur tells her while stepping outside, joining his daughter on the porch.

"She said she was going to come and say goodbye." Blue eyes pleaded her father for a couple more minutes, "Im sure she's just stuck in traffic… five more minutes?" She smiled when her father sighed in defeat and walked back inside of the cool house. But the smile instantly fell from Spencer's face as she leaned on the railing that wrapped around the porch, she knew in the pit of her stomach that Ashley wasn't coming to say goodbye this time but for some reason, she felt the need to stay and just give the brunette a chance.

It was the faster five minutes of the blonde's life as she stood there on the porch watching cars pass by in front of her house, none of them belonging to a certain brunette that held her heart captive. She slowly moved her legs down the steps, carrying her bags in her hands. She moved slowly, still hoping that Ashley's car would turn down her driveway. But once Arthur pulled out of the same driveway, she knew that she wouldn't get to say goodbye to her best friend again. She fought back the tears that had no reason to fall; in her mind she felt that she just wasn't good enough for the brunette.

As Spencer sat on the plane, waiting for her arrival back to Arkansas, she replayed the entire conversation that she had with Aiden earlier that day:

"_So that's it?" Aiden looked at Spencer, "Im staying with Morgan but still get to be 100 percent in our child's life?" He seemed unsure at how easy and reasonable Spencer was being._

_Spencer nodded, "Yep. If that's what you want, Aiden."_

"_But…" Aiden started, "What about all of the doctor appointments? Where is it going to be born? What about all of that good stuff?" He stared at the girl that held hold of his heart still._

_Spencer sighed and closed her eyes, "I'll go to the doctor appointments, keep you up to date with everything I find out. It's going to be difficult being two thousand miles away and you're fucking some other girl." She looked at the boy in front of her that she honestly felt nothing else towards but love that meant nothing more than friendship._

"_Spencer…" _

_Spencer stood up and started to pace around the room, holding onto her stomach, "I guess it just depends on the time the baby decides to come out. Where we're both at when the time comes is where the baby will be born. I'll give you the expected date and hopefully it'll come out by then," She rubs her stomach where the baby lays, "And we'll be together at that point so we both can experience that birthing of our kid." She sent Aiden a sweet smile which he happily returned it._

"_I don't know how Morgan is going to take this," He laughed lightly, leaning back in the lawn chair that he was occupying on the back porch of the Carlin's, "I mean… she's not too big on the whole fact that im having a baby with my ex who I was in love with." He avoided eye contact with Spencer._

_The blonde took her seat in the empty chair next to Aiden, "Well she can shove it. This is going to be one hot baby." She commented which earned a laugh from the two friends, a laugh that was far over due and settled the grounds between the two adults._

When Spencer got back into her dorm room that night, she collapsed onto her bed, dreading the first doctor's appointment in the morning and also she was still very upset that Ashley had not yet contacted her. She rolled over, looking up at her ceiling wondering where the brunette was, what she was up too. So she grabbed her phone and turned it on, hoping that she had an explanation from Ashley waiting. Once the phone was completely turned on, she waited a few minutes before her phone stopped vibrating, indicating everything she missed during her travel back.

She opened the text messages first and there were only four, two from Annie, one from Corey, and then one from Jake. Her hope fell quickly and she was upset with Ashley even more now, she just couldn't think of a reason why Ashley never stopped by to say goodbye to her, it just wasn't Ashley. She quickly read Annie's messages: _**Hey girl can't wait for you to come back to the shit hole! There's like 12 feet of snow and your sexy ass is still in sunny California. I am so befriending you right now. **_Spencer chuckled at her friend's nonsense and went to the next message from her: _**Spencey Poo! Where the hell are you? I better find you in your room tomorrow morning bright and early. **_She couldn't help but groan at the fact she knew that when Annie meant bright and early, she meant bright and early.

She then opened the text from Corey: _**Sugar I can't believe you. We have so much to catch up when you get back. Love you girl. **_Spencer rolled her eyes at the nickname he used on her. It always reminded her of her grandmother. _**Hey Spence it's me. Can't wait to see you in the morning, I hope you have a great flight in. We'll stop and grab some breakfast at my folk's diner before your appointment. Sweet dreams. **_She smiled at Jakes text and closed her phone happily and set it down on her night stand and before she knew it, she was out like a light.

Ashley rolled over in bed, rubbing her eyes so they'd focus on the clock that sat on her nightstand: 3:27am. She heard a light snoring coming from beside her and she lay frozen in her own bed. She moved her hand slightly over her body and she was completely naked. Ashley's eyes went wide as she slowly turned to see the body next to her. She froze again when all she saw was the back of a red headed girl and her exposed back.


	18. Chapter 18

A million and one things were running through Ashley's head, why did this happen? How did it happen? Spencer was already gone; she fucked up by never saying goodbye. She mentally slapped herself for doing this, she barely knew the red headed girl, and the last encounter with her was the night at the club years ago when Spencer walked in on the two of them. Ashley slowly moved her body out from the bed without waking up the girl. She grabbed the clothes that were discarded last night and walked out of her bedroom. She collapsed on the couch in the living room and sighed deeply, jumping at the sound of her sisters' voice.

"You okay?" Ashley watched Kyla sit down next to her on the couch, she was now wearing only a shirt and underwear. Ashley shook her head and tears silently fell down the cheeks of the older brunette, "Ash it's going to be okay, a lot of people fuck up in relationships." Kyla told her sister, trying to sincere but it only made Ashley cry more.

"I never got to say goodbye to her, Ky, I know that she's thinking the worst. I know I hurt her," Ashley laid her head down in Kyla's lap, "I don't even know how _that _happened," She motioned towards her bedroom and closed her eyes. All Ashley wanted was to be with Spencer but she had to be smart enough to let Aiden take her place, it was the right thing to do, or at least it's what felt right at the moment.

By morning time, Spencer awoke to banging on the door; she knew exactly who it was because it was bright and early just like Annie said in the text message from the night before. She stumbled out of bed and made her way over to the door, squinting her eyes from the light, "Yes Annie?"

Annie pushed right past Spencer without saying anything, she sat down on the bed and patted the spot next to her for Spencer to come and join her. Slowly Spencer walked back over to her bed and took the spot she was in a few moments before under the covers, "Spill, bitch."

Lightly laughing, Spencer told Annie everything that had happened between her and Ashley, "And that's about it," She ended by sighing deeply, wiping the single tear that fell.

"Im not liking her too much, Spence, you can do so much better." Spencer laughed lightly again, she knew that she couldn't do any better than Ashley, "I mean if I were in love with you, I'd make sure I was there to say goodbye to you. She was probably out fucking some chick."

It was like a knife going straight through Spencer's newly mended heart when she heard Annie's words, she quickly shook her head, "No, no. Ashley wouldn't do that." She tried to believe her own words but failing, she tried to trick herself into believing them but a part of her felt like that is what had happened, she couldn't help but feel betrayed.

"I saw the way she looked at other girls, Spencer. I just don't want you to get hurt," Annie placed a hand on Spencer's and squeezed it, "There are other girls out there who would treat you so much better, who wouldn't hurt you by sleeping with other people, who would buy you the entire world and more." Spencer looked up at Annie, half believing her words, she couldn't help but buy the speech her friend was giving, "Ashley just fucks up a lot by what you've told me, I mean, do you always want to live in this hurt and pain?"

The blonde shook her head, "No but I mean, everyone makes mistakes…"

Annie moved closer to the blonde, "Spence, believe me, no one can make that many mistakes and still get your heart. It's too broken by her," She kept moving closer to Spencer which didn't go unnoted by the blonde either, "trust me, there is another girl out there who loves you more than anything and would go the extra mile to get you." She moved even closer as her words became quieter.

Spencer couldn't help but mentally freak out when she figured out what Annie was trying to do, she honestly didn't know what to do, "Um…" she said quietly, there was no way of getting out of this without being rude which hurt Spencer to think about, but thankfully a knock came from her door and Spencer jumped out of her bed, leaving Annie dumbfounded sitting on the edge still. She opened the door up to reveal a handsome cowboy, "Jake!" She smiled brightly and wrapped her arms around the boy. She couldn't help but smile at the sight of him or Ashley was replaced in her mind with him, but subconsciously she was there.

She shook her thoughts away because if Ashley was just going to hurt her, she needed to move on as well. Aiden was happily with Morgan and both agreed to stay good friends for the baby's sake, and then there was Ashley who didn't even know herself what she was doing with her life except for hurting everyone that loves and cares about her. She pulled Jake inside, didn't think twice about what she was about to do, she put all of her other thoughts behind and snaked her arms around his neck and pulled him down into a kiss. Everyone in the room was surprised by this action, even Spencer herself, but neither she nor Jake cared, and it was what he wanted to do so badly since the moment he saw her again.

"Well hello to you too, Spence." He smiled brightly down at the blonde who was glowing.

That's when it hit her, even though she was happy with Jake, she wanted Ashley. That thought wouldn't leave her mind the entire morning until she was lying down on the bed in a gown that showed her butt if she stood up. Spencer closed her eyes when the nurse squirted stuff on Spencer's belly, it was cold. She had a hold of Jake's hand when she heard the little heart beat coming from the machine next to her, she heard her own heart beat race at the sound. She kept her eyes closed, she never imagined being here without Ashley and here she was with another man who didn't belong in the picture.

"Here's your baby, Ms. Carlin." The nurse smiled brightly as Spencer opened her eyes slowly which were already filled with tears, both sad and happy tears that is. Spencer looked up at the screen where the nurse was pointing at, it took her breath away, "It looks really healthy too." The nurses' smile beamed down at the blonde who smiled up at Jake who even had tears in his eyes.

"It's beautiful." He said quietly, he never would have thought he'd be in this situation with Spencer. In his mind, he never thought he'd get to see this girl again, but he'd always love her. Spencer nodded and looked back up at the screen, she was still speechless, "Can you tell the sex now?" Jake asked, truly intrigued by everything happening.

The nurse chuckled and shook her head, "No not until 18 weeks, so your next visit." She smiled at the two, "I'll leave you two alone for a moment." She said and then she was gone.

Jake looked down at Spencer who still hadn't said a single thing, "You okay, Spence?"

She nodded, she was so happy that this was happening but she couldn't help but be bothered by the way it was. It was happening all wrong she felt, it wasn't supposed to happen anything like this.

**Review! Review! Review!**


	19. Chapter 19

**First off I want to thank all my reviewers (and all those other readers that don't review) for keeping up with the story. It means a lot to the author for all of your input and a lot of y'alls reviews make me laugh especially the one about wanting to 'smack Ashley for her behavior'. Keep on reading and reviewing!**

Ashley banged her fist on a familiar door until it opened, "Damn it Ashley what's your problem?" Aiden stood in front of her in just his old basketball shorts that hung a few inches lower than his boxers. He looked at his former best friend and quickly softened at the sight of her. Her eyes were bloodshot and her cheeks were stained from previous tears. He engulfed Ashley quickly then, "Ash what happened?"

They stood in the doorway for a few quiet moments before Ashley pulled away, "I fucked up." She wanted to talk to Aiden about how she was feeling and take his advice but it was hard for her because in her mind, Aiden would always want Spencer and he got to her first which would mean that she couldn't move in on her best friend's ex. "Spencer called about an hour ago."

"_Ashley where were you?" _

_Ashley's heart dropped, "I got caught up with an old friend…" She trailed off, hoping that Spencer wouldn't know that she was sleeping with another woman when days earlier she had confessed her love to the blonde._

_Spencer stayed quiet for a moment, "You were sleeping with someone weren't you?" She said it quietly but it was filled with a lot of hurt. Ashley didn't say anything, "Ashley…" She could tell by Spencer's voice that she was on the verge of crying and yelling. She knew that she had hurt the blonde but it had already happened, she can't go back and change it._

"_Spencer I didn't mean too, it's not what it see-"_

_Spencer quickly cut off her best friend, "Ashley you slept with her. It's whatever I mean, we weren't together. We still aren't but we could have been but you're too much of a coward." Ashley stayed quiet, the words she was hearing stung, "I want to be with you Ashley but you don't understand that. All you ever do now that I've confessed my love to you, let you know that you have my heart, is push me back towards Aiden who im sorry but I don't want to be with." She bit the inside of her cheek as tears started to silently fall, "God Ashley, how many times are you going to hurt me before you realize that it's enough?"_

"_Spence…" Was all Ashley could say, she didn't have anything to say, anything she would say wouldn't help her in this, not anymore._

"_No Ash… im sorry. Maybe we just aren't meant to be together, not until you at least pick up your act and stop hurting everyone around you." Spencer became quiet along with Ashley, she wanted to just hang up but she couldn't bring herself to do it._

"_I love you Spencer…" _

_After a few moments, Spencer responded, "Yeah… you too, Ash." _

"And then she just hung up." Ashley hung her head, she was a complete idiot for her actions and it was just now hitting her.

Aiden didn't say anything for a few minutes; he just sat there looking at Ashley. Was it bad that he was happy about what Spencer had told Ashley? He wasn't sure if knowing that Spencer never wanted to be with him again was a good thing or a bad thing because in the back of his mind, he had always pictured her in his later life. "Have you called her back yet?" He watched his best friend shake her head, "Im sorry, Ash… but you did screw up bad this time."

Spencer sat next to Jake at the kitchen counter of his house, she enjoyed being around his family because it reminded her of what she could have had if she had a mother around all of the time. She smiled a lot when she was at his house, "Spencer im so glad you're back for school, we've sure have missed you." Jakes mom, Mia, said while taking out a pie from the oven and setting it on top of the stove.

"Yeah it's nice having another girl around," Grace, Jakes sister, announced as she popped a grape into her mouth. "And I haven't seen Jake this happy in a long time." She confessed with a light laughter.

Grace was three years younger than Spencer so she didn't remember Spencer quite well from whenever they were little, she just knew she was always around and hanging out with her brother and also that they were really close. "We've defiantly got too much testosterone going on in this house." Mia laughed along with her daughter and leaned against the counter.

"You guys can shut up anytime now," Jake's cheek were burning as his sister kept teasing him.

Mia looked at the three kids in front of her and couldn't help but smile, "So Spence, tell me, how do you like being pregnant so far?"

Within seconds, all of the eyes in the room were on her and she became very nervous, "Crappy. I mean, I love it. The whole throwing up in the mornings, heat flashes, gaining weight, it's all really good." Mia laughed because she knew exactly what the blonde was going through, she had gone through it four different times. "But in all honesty, im thankful that I have Jake with me here to help me through everything." She leaned her head on his shoulder and he snaked his arm around her waist.

Spencer was happy at this moment, if you asked her she'd tell you that she couldn't believe what all was happening but she was glad to have someone by her side helping her along the way. But if you asked the blonde who she would want by her side helping her through everything, she wouldn't say Jake or Aiden. Neither her father nor her own brothers, not even the new friends that she had made here during school, no. If you asked her who she would want, she would tell you Ashley. A girl who had made more mistakes than anyone she's ever known put together, but in the end, she still loves her. And if you asked her why that girl isn't next to her, she'd tell you that she couldn't be there for the blonde because she's emotionally and physically unavailable. She wouldn't be happy about telling that to someone, her words would drip with sadness.

The entire Adams family including Spencer sat in the living room, enjoying each others company and listening to the radio that was a mixture of music; country, rock, and some hip hop. Spencer sat quietly in between Jake and his oldest brother, Connor, and listened to the music. She tuned everyone else out because ever since Ashley, music spoke to her in a way that others couldn't. She heard the DJ faintly announcing, "Up next, we have the hot new single from the one and only, Ashley Davies!" Her heart stopped, she wanted to listen to the song and she needed too, "_I Never Told You_, here it is folks. And afterwards, we have the rock-star right here to talk about her music."

She jumped up off the couch, "Do you mind if I turn this up a bit?" Jake narrowed his eyes at the blonde, knowing that she was very much in love with this rock-star. She sat down by the radio and turned it up a notch while everyone continued on with what they were doing; Jake just sat and listened to the words, knowing the song was for Spencer.

_I miss those blue eyes  
How you kissed me at night  
I miss the way we see  
Like there's no sunrise  
Like the taste of your smile  
I miss the way we breathe_

Spencer closed her eyes; she knew that this song was for her too. This had to be the song that Ashley was always working on and she could never listen to it or even get a sneak peak.

_But I never told you  
What I should have said  
No I never told you  
I just held it in  
And now I miss everything  
About you  
I can't believe I still want you  
After all the things we've  
Been through  
I miss everything about you  
Without you_

Jake watched Spencer's reaction to the song carefully; he knew that if Ashley picked herself up and became a better person, Spencer would run back to her without thinking twice. He didn't want to lose the only thing that made him feel like his old self, not again at least.

_I see your blue eyes  
Every time I close mine  
You make it hard to see  
Where I belong to when I'm not  
Around you  
It's like I'm not with me_

Spencer's heart raced as she let the song flow through her, as she let Ashley's voice speak to her through a way that Ashley knew how to speak. It was the only way she ever truly learned how. She could hear the sadness in Ashley's voice as it came through the speakers and filled Spencer's ears.

_But I never told you  
What I should have said  
No I never told you  
I just held it in  
And now I miss everything  
About you  
I can't believe I still want  
You  
After all the things we've  
Been through  
I miss everything about you  
Without you_

But I never told you  
What I should have said  
No I never told you  
I just held it in  
And now I miss everything  
About you  
(still you're gone)  
Can't believe that I still want  
You  
After all the things we've  
Been through  
I miss everything about you  
Without you

As the song ended, Jake never took his eyes of the blonde girl who currently still sat on the floor by the radio. She was on the verge of tears, her eyes were still closed as the melody ended and the DJ started to talk again, "There it was, folks and here is the rock-star herself," Spencer's heart skipped a beat when she heard the name, "Ashley Davies, thank you for joining us tonight."

"Hey Pete and everyone out there listening in on us right now," Spencer smiled at the corky brunette, she could imagine her sitting there in her tight jeans, her favorite band shirt, her hair messy but still perfectly curly.

"Ashley, tell us a little bit about this song? I know im dying to know who this mysterious person that you keep singing about is and I also know that all of your fans and dying to know is are you single?"

Spencer tightened her jaw and waited for the answer, she smiled at the sound of Ashley's light laughter, "Well Pete I believe I can not tell you the name of who the song is about, but if she's listening, she knows who it's about," Spencer sighed quietly, "but I can tell you that I am single, but currently not looking for anything. I've screwed up a lot with this girl and im just taking some time to myself while im on tour to come to my senses about it all."

Spencer's eyes shot open, Ashley was now on her first tour, she was doing a radio interview in a town close by, "Well there you have it listeners, Ashley wants to apologize to this girl, she loves you much so just call her!"

Spencer laughed a little along with Ashley, "She's somewhere in this town, the most beautiful girl here, that's the girl that im in love with and im truly, _truly_ sorry for everything I have done."

**Review! Review! Review! The song that was used was I Never Told You by Colbie Caillat.**


	20. Chapter 20

It's been three months since Ashley had apologized to Spencer over the radio waves that were heard across the entire country and throughout some other countries; it was played over and over again on different stations, CNN news, even the early morning shows. Whenever Ashley would go into an interview, the number question is 'why do you think Spencer has yet to respond to your public apology?'. For Ashley, it's getting to be too much, everywhere she goes she's reminded that the love of her life hasn't yet forgiven her mistakes yet and if she ever will, she won't know.

But then again, it hasn't been fun and games for Spencer either. More people than Spencer knew personally knew about the apology and asked her the same question, 'why haven't you forgiven her yet?'. Frankly, Spencer believes that Ashley doesn't deserve an apology just yet. Maybe she's being a little rational but it's only fair, so she thought.

So Spencer continued on with her life at the college and with her new friends. She kept in touch with Aiden frequently and updated him about everything and she continued to hang out with Jacob non-stop it seemed. Today was like any other normal day, minus the doctor's visit that was in progress.

Spencer held onto Jacob's hand as they waited for the news if it was going to be a boy or a girl, they were both so anxious to find out. Even though Jacob wasn't the real father, Spencer looked at him like he was; everyone looked at him like he was. She wasn't more than five months pregnant but Jacob loved that child more than anything. To Spencer, it seemed like he cared more about her and the baby more than Aiden cared. But at the end of the day, she was just happy to have someone there for her to help her through everything.

The blonde tried hard every moment to not think about the famous rock star, but whenever you try so hard to forget something you care so much about, it seems to become impossible to forget about such a thing. Jacob knew Spencer better than she ever thought; he knew that whenever she looked at him that it wasn't the same look she had given Ashley whenever she was here. Jacob had witnessed it himself, he could tell just by looking deep into Spencer's eyes that she's not in love with the cowboy, nothing like Ashley that is. So with everyday, he tried harder and harder to make Spencer happy, but you can't force someone to fall in love with you, it's just impossible.

The doctor that would be delivering Spencer's baby walked into their room with their folder in her hands, she had a smile on her face, "Would you both like to know the sex of the baby?" She stood on the side of the bed, waiting for the answer.

Both Jacob and Spencer smiles grew to their eyes, "Yes!"

Dr. Lopez smiled brightly, she had always enjoyed this part of the most, "You're going to have…" She looked up from the folder and looked at both Jacob and Spencer proudly and closed the folder, "A girl."

Instantly, Spencer started crying, but not out of sadness, it was out of joy. Sure a boy she would have done the same thing, but she felt like she would know what to do with a girl better than a boy anyways. They both watched their doctor leave and they shared a looked, a look that said everything but nothing all at once. "I'll let you get dressed," Jacob told Spencer quietly before kissing her on the forehead, "I'll be right outside the door, sweetheart."

Once Jacob was out of the room, Spencer continued to sit there quietly, not moving. It was finally hitting her; she was having a baby girl. More tears streamed down her face as she pulled out her cell phone and dialed Aiden's number; she couldn't wait to tell him.

"Hey Spence, how'd the doctor visit go?" Aiden said as his greeting, he has been waiting for this call for the past hour so he could barely contain his excitement. "It's a boy isn't it? I knew it was!"

Spencer laughed through the phone, "Well hello to you too, Aid. But I have good news and bad news." She said biting her lip to keep herself from laughing. "Good news, you're going to be pretty protective over this young one." Aiden started to speak but Spencer hurried and cut him off, "Bad news… for you anyways… it's a girl."

Aiden was quiet for a moment but whenever he decided to speak again, it sounded like he was getting choked up, "Im having a baby girl!" And then he became serious, "No boy better touch her until she's forty."

Spencer laughed again through the phone, she knew that Aiden would make an excellent father to a baby girl, "Well Aid, spread the news around, im going to call my father once I get home."

"Are you going to tell Ashley?"

The line was silent on both ends, "I have to go Aid, tell everyone I said hey. Bye." She hurried off the phone, she didn't want to call Ashley and it just didn't feel like she could. That didn't mean that she didn't want too of course, but she couldn't bring herself to dial her familiar number.

**I know it's short, but let's get some reviews!**


	21. Chapter 21

A few weeks had passed and everyone was calling, texting, face-booking, you name it, they were contacting Spencer somehow. Friends of friends called to congratulate her on the baby news, people she didn't even know somehow talked to her. Everyone except Ashley. Neither one of the girls had yet to call one another. Although, Spencer had a feeling Ashley knew already because Aiden and her spoke frequently still, unlike her and the brunette. Sure it bothered her, why wouldn't it?

But the blonde sat in her video class, taking notes on whatever the teacher was talking about, she wasn't exactly in the right state of mind to be in class. She couldn't wait to get out of class; she was going shopping today with Grace to pick out 'hot pregnant lady clothes'. The blonde smiled at the way Grace said it and turned her attention back to her teachers lecture. She watched as he put in a short video production that a student last semester had turned in for the project they were about to be assigned.

After class, Spencer called Grace up and they made their way over to the mall. They first stopped to get ice cream because the blonde was craving it and they began to eat it while they approached the escalader. "So are you scared of having the baby, Spence?" Grace turned her head back towards Spencer to look at her and wait for an answer while licking her ice cream.

Spencer laughed, "You're licking that like a whore." Both girls shared a laugh, "And yeah I am. Im actually really terrified," She shrugged then, taking a lick from her cookie dough ice cream cone, "But im content right now, I've got ice cream and im going shopping." Both girls shared another light laugh together. Spencer really enjoyed the time that she spent with Grace because it was easy.

Once they finally found where the store was located from one of the mall maps, they were on their way to Maternity Mom for some 'hot clothes'. Though it was winter still, according to Grace, pregnant ladies can still pull off the spring look when it's below zero degrees. The store was in sight and Spencer pushed opened the doors and spotted a shirt off to the side almost immediately. "Oh my god, this is adorable!" She held up a black halter top to her torso, "Im so trying this one on first."

They spent a few more minutes looking at the same rack before moving onto the one next to it, they were having a great time. Grace was singing along to the song that was playing in the store and picking out the most ridiculous shirts that someone would wear and telling Spencer to try it on 'just for kicks'. But then on the radio, a voice came on that stopped both girls in their tracks and Grace studied Spencer. Almost like lightening, Spencer's mood had changed from happy and calm to sad and anxious.

Spencer listened to the words closely:

_Walking out the door this morning wondering what it is that's going on with you  
Thinking of a way to say I'm sorry for something I'm not sure I do  
So come on baby let me in and show me what this really is cause_

Spencer lowered the shirt she had in her hand back down to the rack and placed a hand on her stomach over the baby. There was a butterfly invasion feeling deep in her stomach, she wasn't sure what it was though since the baby was in there instead.

Something must have made you say that, what did I do to make you say that to me  
Something must have made you so mad, what can I do to make you say come back to me

_Hoping for a moment that I turn around and you'll be coming after me  
Cause all that I can say is that it's obvious, it's obvious you're all I see  
So come on baby let me in and show me what this really is about  
Cause I can't read you  
Come on baby let me in and show me what this really is cause_

It was Ashley's newest single that made it big, all of her songs were making it big now-a-days. She was the most requested artist on the radio, her cd sold over a million across the world the first week it was out. Spencer bit her lip thinking about Ashley, she knew how successful she was becoming from magazines and radio talk shows, even just the normal talk shows that she was a guest on. Spencer would be lying if she said that she didn't keep up with Ashley's success rate, didn't watch the show that she was appearing on, didn't turn up the radio a little bit when one of her songs came on.

_Something must have made you say that, what did I do to make you say that to me  
Something must have made you so mad, what can I do to make you say come back to me_

And I'll be here in the morning if you say stay, if you say stay to me

Something must have made you say that, what did I do to make you say that to me  
Something must have made you so mad, what can I do to make you say come back to me

There both girls stood still, listening to the last part of the song and then the DJ, "There you have it folks, Ashley Davies newest single 'Stay'. It's a great song, makes you wonder who it is about." He laughs into the radio waves which makes Spencer's jaw tighten, "Call us now to win tickets to Ashley's concert over in Springfield, Missouri this Saturday night! The number is 555-2808, caller 30 is the winner!"

The blonde took a deep breath and let it out slowly once the DJ stopped talking, she turned to Grace and smiled, "Come on, these clothes aren't going to jump out at us." Grace laughed at Spencer's silliness and they both continued on with shopping.

After the two girls were done shopping, they made their way back to the car where they started talking about what had happened in Maternity Mom. "Are you going to the concert?" Grace asked putting the car into reverse and pulling out of her parking spot.

"No. Why would I?"

Spencer didn't even look over at the younger girl; she knew that Grace could tell she wanted to go to the concert so bad. But for what? Ruin what she had worked so hard at? Keeping her distance away from Ashley is what she needs, "I don't know, it'd help you I think. I mean, I love that you and my brother are together, but I'd love it even more if you-"

Spencer cut the younger girl off quickly, "If I could get you an autograph?" She laughed bitterly. She didn't understand why she was suddenly being rude with Grace; she had done nothing to the blonde.

Grace ignored the tone that Spencer was using and kept her eyes on the road, "No, what I was _going _to say is that I would love it even more if you were happy again." She pulled up to the stoplight and Spencer sat there quietly and Grace looked over at her, "So what do you say? Road-trip?"

**The song I used is called Stay by Safetysuit and I know it's been awhile since I've updated this story or any of my other stories, but school and work has been kicking my butt so I just wanted to get another short chapter in before I got busy again. Tell me what you think is going to happen or what you want to happen or anything! I want your input people! Give me lots of reviews and I'll update faster. Scouts honor.**


	22. Chapter 22

**If this story didn't have enough drama in it already, it sure is going to have a lot in the next few chapters coming up! Thanks again to everyone who reviewed, I know I normally don't do any author notes or whatever, but I thought I should throw one in here. Also, sometime or another when I get around to it, im redoing the first chapter as in just taking out the summary I put in there. I don't exactly understand why I do that to my stories, they never seem to follow it. But here is the update to the story, also, a possible title change coming! Ideas? What the hell let me hear them!**

Spencer didn't exactly understand why she agreed to go to this concert in the first place, all she remembers is that when Grace asked her again at the stoplight, Spencer couldn't say no because her heart had beaten out what her mind was saying and answered for once. You can only listen to your head for so long before your heart decides to take over and put you back into place, back where you're happy and where you need to be. It's just some common sense, follow your heart.

So the two girls packed their bags, hopped into the car and drove up north towards Springfield, Missouri to see one of the biggest concerts happening in the South since Ozzy came. They left early to be able to buy tickets at the ticket booth or from one of those people who stand outside of the arena selling front row tickets. Honestly, those are the ones that Spencer wanted because if she was going to this concert, she defiantly wanted Ashley to see her there. Why though? That's what the blonde had yet to figure out.

As Grace drove closer to their destination, the more excited she became. She had never been to a rock concert before so she was thrilled to see what all the hype was about. She had been to concerts before, but they were always country concerts, there's a _huge_ difference in the environment and energy. She couldn't keep herself from talking about how excited she was and how she might be able to meet the famous Ashley Davies because Grace would be lying if she said she wasn't a big fan of hers.

The more that Grace talked about how excited she was about the concert, the more Spencer became anxious and wished that she would have just said no to the entire thing. The feeling in her stomach felt like she was going to be sick she was so nervous. She placed her hand on her stomach and drew tiny circles around her belly button that was beginning to stick out. The feeling of being sick slowly went away but it came back in full force as soon as they pulled into the parking lot that was already filled with thousands of cars. Her mind was racing with questions and all sorts of things. She had no idea how she was going to approach the brunette if they were to even talk.

"How are we going to buy tickets anyways?" Spencer turned to Grace who eagerly looked for a parking spot, smiling from ear to ear, excited for everything that was going to happen tonight.

"Um we can start by going to the ticket booth if you'd like," Grace said quietly as she paid her full attention to all of the people walking through the parking lot as she drove up and down rows just to find an empty spot, "Geez I never would have guessed that Ashley was this popular out here in the South." She laughed quietly to herself, not expecting Spencer to answer back with anything. She hardly expects her to speak for the rest of the night.

Eventually the girls found a parking spot and they made their way up to the arena, ignoring comments and whispers. Apparently, Ashley wasn't the only well-known girl coming to this concert. They made their way through huge crowds that were gathered around everywhere, smoking or talking or drinking. You name it, anywhere you looked and you could find someone doing it. They walked up to the ticket booth and waited in line patiently. They were next in line, behind a younger couple when the tickets were sold out. All four people groaned and the younger couple left while Grace turned to Spencer, "Damn it Spencer, what are we going to do?"

Spencer opened her mouth to reply to Grace but was cut off by the guy behind the glass window selling tickets, "Wait Spencer?" He asked and she nodded, "Spencer Carlin?"

"Yeah…" She looked between Grace and the boy who had shaggy brown hair, "Do I know you?" She was going to feel bad if she did and didn't recognize the boy.

He laughed though and motioned them to come to the window, "No, no, you don't know me but we all know you," He motioned to everyone in the booth which were just two other people, "Um well can you prove that you're Spencer Carlin?"

"Yeah but I have no idea why I need too…" She trailed off, a look of confusion still on her face.

Both girls watched the boy behind the glass window sigh, it was a sad sigh but they watched him open up a box, "I work for Ashley, im the younger brother of the guitarist and in need of a job so they made a deal with every place they perform to let me work the ticket booth," He explained as he pulled out tons of tickets, "and I was directed by Ashley to save two tickets every concert," Immediately, Spencer's heart ached, "just in case you came to one." He held up the box then, "These are all the tickets that have been saved because you never showed up. We have them from your town to Boston, to Oregon, to Los Angeles, everywhere." He looks at Spencer then with a lot of emotion, "I've known Ashley for a few years now and I've never seen her cry before." He shakes his head then and the blonde's heart aches more, "So you could only imagine how bad I feel every time before the concert starts when she comes to see if you came and I tell her no. She walks away with tears in her eyes and it sucks," He chuckles lightly as a smile comes onto his face, "But whenever I tell her that you are here tonight, she's going to be the happiest girl on the planet." He smiles at the two girls in front of him as he hands them their tickets, "Enjoy the show, Spencer."

And with that, the boy who never gave his name, slid down the blinds and the girls looked at each other, "What just happened?" Spencer asked Grace, mentally freaking out and feeling like she was going to be sick.

"We just got," Grace paused for a moment as she read over the tickets, "third row seats! What! And she says she lov-I mean, yay?" Both girls laugh, Spencer was thankful to have the younger girl with her, she made her laugh when she needed it the most.

The two girls made their way into the arena, Spencer walked next to Grace who was bouncing with excitement while she, herself, mentally and physically prepared for the night to come. They stopped by the bathroom because of Spencer who always had to go to the restroom now before making their way to their seats. It was packed already so the concert must be getting ready to start. Spencer played with the hem of shirt nervously as they made their way to the third row; the only two open spots left it looked like in the place. Spencer turned back to Grace and gave her an uneasy look; suddenly Spencer didn't want to be here anymore.

Before Spencer could say anything or even leave for that matter, the lights in the arena dimmed and smoke started to roll out from the edges of the stage and everyone in the arena started hollering and whistling. Spencer watched as a dark figure walked out onto the stage and it was a man, she watched him closely as he made his way back to the drums and started playing them, she recognized the rhythm as another dark figure walked out onto the stage and picked up a guitar and started to play the same rhythm. Spencer's heart stopped as she saw the next dark figure walk out onto the stage but the blood started flowing again when she realized it wasn't Ashley, it was just the girl who played the bass guitar. All three people started to play the same rhythm and the drummer did a roll and as soon as he was finished with his solo, another dark figure ran out onto the stage and fire bursts up off the edge of the stage, it was Ashley.

Everyone in the arena was screaming by now and all Spencer could do was watch as her life was now again, standing in front of her. "Hello Springfield!" The crowd was going wild as she said the first words of the night; she laughed lightly and looked around the crowd, never once looking in Spencer's direction, "How are you guys doing tonight!" She held the microphone out to the crowd as everyone screamed their answers, even Grace who then made Spencer laugh nervously, "Okay, okay, settle down." Spencer watched Ashley and how she moved across the stage, "I want to know one thing, I do this at every show, if you've been to one you would know," She smirked out to her fans that were still going crazy, "Does anyone know what im going to ask?" Spencer listened as everyone around her was screaming out an answer and she watched as Ashley pulled up a teenage girl from the front row up on stage next to her, "You looked pretty confident standing there, hiding behind you friend there," People laughed, though it wasn't funny, "What's your name gorgeous?" Spencer's gut instantly filled up with jealously, what was Ashley doing?

"Taylor."

"Taylor, do you know what im going to ask everyone?" She laughed as Taylor shook her head 'no'. It made Spencer feel better because she didn't know what was going on either.

Taylor fidgeted with the hem of shirt, "To be honest this is my first concert." She spoke clearly into the microphone that Ashley held out in front of her.

The crowd was going wild still, wanting Ashley to say whatever it was she was going to say, "It's okay Taylor, im glad to be taking your concert virginity, I'll go gentle." And with that, she winked at the teenage girl and handed her two back stage passes and helped her back down off of the stage before turning back to the crowd that jumped anxiously in front of her.

At that moment, the world stopped for Spencer and for Ashley. At that moment, Ashley had turned towards the third row, where she expects Spencer to be at every other concert. Suddenly, no one was in the arena, it was just the two girls, staring at each other. The blonde watched as Ashley swallowed hard and licked her lips, she looked hopeful at that moment but then again, she looked scared. Vulnerable. It was that moment when Spencer let a tear escape and slide down her cheek, she turned away then, making Ashley go back into reality and continue with her concert. "Um," Ashley took a moment to breathe.

"Did you see that?" Grace turned to Spencer, "She saw you." She said into Spencer's ear as the blonde watched Ashley narrow her eyes at Grace. She then wiped the tears out of her eyes and run her hand through her hair. She nodded towards Ashley, both of them talking to each other without words, just their eyes. Something that they used to do all of the time whenever they were younger, it always bothered Aiden.

"Okay," Ashley said quietly, not meaning to say it out loud, she laughed lightly and turned back to the crowd in front of her, "Who's ready to rock n' roll bitches?" Spencer had never seen Ashley fake a bigger smile in her life before tonight which pained Spencer's heart. She laughed at the question that she apparently said at the beginning of every concert, it was corny.

At times Spencer would catch her self singing along with Ashley, just like everyone else around her was doing. Other times, she'd catch herself watching the way Ashley moved across the stage so freely, slid on her knees just because it made the crowd scream louder, come out of an outfit change after a song and be sluttier looking just because that's what the fans craved. She had lost a lot of weight since the last time Spencer had seen her which worried the blonde.

The concert was already more than half way through now and she had yet sing a song that Spencer hadn't heard, "Okay people shut up," The crowd went wild at how blunt Ashley was, she shook her head, "Right now, we, as the band, are going to take a request before we go for a ten minute break so come on, let us hear it!" Everyone started screaming song names, ones she had already sang, others she had yet to sing. Spencer watched Ashley jump off the stage and walk down the aisle, everyone reaching out to touch her but she was guarded by her body guards that stood at the stage on the floor. She stopped at a young teenage girl, "What's you name, Sweetheart?"

"Kayla."

"You have a specific song you want to hear?"

Kayla stood there, pondering on what she was going to say, Spencer watched her closely as she leaned up to the microphone, "I'll tell you if you let me kiss you," Everyone went wild at the comment, screaming 'do it'. Spencer closed her eyes, knowing that Ashley was going to kiss the girl because she was a people pleaser when it came to her music. Whenever the crowd turned up the noise two more notches', she knew that it had happened, "And now for my song choice, I think you should sing us a new one, a new one about how you're through with waiting around for that Spencer chick and you're moving on."

Grace stopped jumping and looked at Spencer as everyone around them started laughing, noticing she was here, but everyone else in the arena who didn't know that Spencer was here loved the idea. "I don't think so," Ashley replied to the girl and everyone booed, she instantly felt bad and walked back towards the stage, catching blue eyes once more. She was going to sing the song. "Alright Kayla, here you have it. This is the first time anyone else is hearing it," The people who stood on the side of the stage set up a piano in the center of the stage and Ashley sat down and started to play the beginning of it, the lights went dim and everyone in the arena became quiet, "It's called _Almost Lover_," Spencer watched Ashley take a deep breath as she started to sing.

"Your fingertips across my skin  
The palm trees swaying in the wind  
Images

You sang me Spanish lullabies  
The sweetest sadness in your eyes  
Clever trick"

Spencer was thrown back into memories as she was wrapped around Ashley's words, everything she sang, she sang with emotion, her voice trembling as she let the words of her heart flow out. The crowd around her didn't make a single noise; they rose up their lighters and started to sway them in the air along with the music.

"I never want to see you unhappy  
I thought you'd want the same for me

Goodbye, my almost lover  
Goodbye, my hopeless dream  
I'm trying not to think about you  
Can't you just let me be?  
So long, my luckless romance  
My back is turned on you  
I should've known you'd bring me heartache  
Almost lovers always do

We walked along a crowded street  
You took my hand and danced with me  
Images"

Spencer closed her eyes as she knew exactly which memory Ashley was referring too; _it was a summer night as they held onto each other's hand, making their way down a crowded street that overlooked the beach. They had just finished dinner when they decided to be spontaneous and take a walk on the boardwalk with hundreds of other people with the same idea._

_They got to the end where a one man band was playing an acoustic guitar, playing a cover song of some old rock song. Ashley hated slow dancing, she was never good with it, she'd always step on the other person's feet. Spencer on the other hand loved it. She loved any kind of dancing; it was something she had always enjoyed. Her father let her take lessons whenever she was little because it was a way to express her, out of many other ways she had learned to express how she felt._

_So Spencer took the brunettes hand and made her dance with her, it was the best dance Ashley had ever experienced._

"And when you left you kissed my lips  
You told me you'd never ever forget these images, no

I never want to see you unhappy  
I thought you'd want the same for me

Goodbye, my almost lover  
Goodbye, my hopeless dream  
I'm trying not to think about you  
Can't you just let me be?  
So long, my luckless romance  
My back is turned on you  
I should've known you'd bring me heartache  
Almost lovers always do"

Spencer watched Ashley, she had tears running down her face at this point, and she had never seen the girl in front of her so weak, so vulnerable. And it was all of her fault that the strongest person Spencer had ever known next to her father was a broken little girl in front of thousands of people. She had knocked the brunette down to her weakest point because of what?

"I cannot go to the ocean  
I cannot drive the streets at night  
I cannot wake up in the morning  
Without you on my mind  
So you're gone and I'm haunted  
And I bet you are just fine  
Did I make it that easy  
To walk right in and out of my life?"

Spencer pushed her way through the people in her row, the people in the aisles. Everyone who was a true fan of Ashley Davies, they knew who the blonde was. They started yelling, calling her names; Ashley could hear all of the commotion going on. She opened her eyes as she sang the last verse and watched the girl walk all the way out of the arena, never once looking back.

"Goodbye, my almost lover  
Goodbye, my hopeless dream  
I'm trying not to think about you  
Can't you just let me be?  
So long, my luckless romance  
My back is turned on you  
I should've known you'd bring me heartache  
Almost lovers always do"

After the song was over, the crowd went wild, completely forgetting that the girl who made the one on stage a complete and utter mess had just walked right through everyone, leaving. She was so close to Ashley and she couldn't do anything to stop her. She and the other band mates went on their break like she had announced before the song and before she knew it; she was back on stage singing like she was before. Strong, like nothing had affected her, like she didn't just watch as Spencer walked out of her life again.

Ashley glanced at the seat that Spencer was supposed to be occupying and only saw Grace who she had no idea was. Grace was making her way through the crowd then, making her own exit, the concert was slowly coming to an end and for once, Ashley was excited about that.

She ended her concert about a half hour later and she was completely exhausted, she made her way back stage and to her dressing room where groupies were waiting, not for Ashley though, she had made that clear the first night of touring. They stuck around for the two other boys though.

Ashley watched as her bass guitarist is greeted by her four year old daughter, she watched this happen after every show. Her husband kissed her deeply and kissed their daughters forehead, this happened every time. They were so in love that it hurt Ashley to be around it. She opened her door to outside where the tour bus was waiting. As she makes her way out of the building followed by her band mates, she signs autographs as she passes by, looking beyond everyone, looking for a certain blonde.

The brunette was about to get onto the bus when she spotted Spencer and Grace making their way towards their car. Without thinking, Ashley pushes past her fans and runs towards Spencer, calling after her but the blonde never once hearing her name being called from behind. Whenever all three girls heard the commotion from the crazed fans behind them, everyone turned around but Ashley. The brunette stopped and captured Spencer's eyes, they were only ten feet apart and neither one moved.

Grace turned to Spencer, "Don't be a dumbass, Spence, go." She shoved the blonde a little bit towards the brunette, which was all she needed.

Both girls walked towards each other and met in the middle, "Im so sorry, Spencer." Ashley said quietly once they were in arms reach. The fans behind the girls getting closer as everything started to happen, "Please Spen-" Spencer cut Ashley off by kissing her, surprising both her and the brunette and everyone else that saw.

"Come on," Spencer grabbed Ashley's hand and all three girls made their way to Grace's car. They all rode in silence back towards the two younger girls' hotel, never one exchanging a word with another. Everything was a silence spoken, everything was happening without any questions.

**I just had to leave this on a cliffy! Tell me what you think/will/want to happen!**


	23. Chapter 23

Goodbyes are never easy, not a chance in hell will they ever be easy. Unless the person you're saying goodbye too doesn't mean anything to you, but if they mean something to you, then a goodbye to them will be the hardest part ever. Especially when saying goodbye to someone you love, a goodbye tears you apart physically and emotionally, not because you may never see the person again, but because you have to leave their embrace, you no longer feel that security that you feel with the other one while in their presence.

Today.

Today was the day that Spencer Carlin was forced to say goodbye to the one she loved, a silent goodbye as she sleepily watched the one who held her heart in the palm of her hands be dragged away by her manager and the rest of her band while she was left in her hotel bed, surrounded by only her sheets that are now cold. Tears raced down her face as she stared at the doorway, waiting for Ashley to pop back inside, telling her that it was only a joke.

Today was the day that Ashley was physically forced out of the one person she truly loves arms. She demanded to be let go as they approached the elevator, her manager telling her that it was a mistake, that Spencer was just some crazed psycho fan of hers. He tried to tell Ashley that the blonde that she had left mere minutes ago was going to ruin her reputation, that she was no big deal and she could find any other blonde to sleep with.

But Ashley refused to leave this city without telling Spencer goodbye, without any explanation. She refused to leave this state without figuring out finally what she meant to the blonde, what she wanted out of her. Ashley refused to believe anything that was being told to her; she broke free from everyone's grasp and ran back to Spencer's hotel room.

She approached the door, stopping just outside of it about to knock for permission to re-enter when she heard a soft cry from the other side. Instantly, Ashley's heart started to break, that was something that she couldn't stand to hear. She broke inside as she listened to Spencer cry, most likely in the arms of Grace. She lifted her hand once more and knocked three times, she heard movement on the other side of the doorway and she waited patiently, she no longer heard a cry.

The door swung open and blue puffy eyes met brown sad eyes, no words were exchange, everything that was needed to be said was said through their eyes, the doorway into each other souls. Ashley wrapped her arms around the broken girl in front of her and pushes her back slightly so she could enter the room and shut the door so they'd have some sort of privacy.

Once the door was shut, Spencer pulled back slightly and lightly slapped Ashley across the face and looked at the brunette with anger, "Why would you just leave me after-" Ashley couldn't hear anything from then on, she cut off Spencer by pressing her lips against the other girls. It was a hungry kiss, but both girls felt the passion as well.

When Ashley felt like Spencer wasn't going to yell at her or make her feel guilty, she stopped kissing her, pulling away slightly just in case she had to cut the blonde off again, "I love you, Spencer Carlin, please just listen."

Spencer nodded and took a seat on the edge of the bed, her hand finding her stomach, her eyes became wide, "Oh my god, Ash, feel." Ashley looked at the younger girl in confusion but was taken by the hand and it was forcefully placed on the blonde's stomach, "She started kicking," She smiled up at Ashley brightly, "She must love the sound of your voice," Spencer said quietly as she watched the movement underneath her shirt.

Captured in the moment, Ashley dropped the conversation and knelt down in front of Spencer who was still sitting on the bed. Her eyes found the blue eyes that she loved, as she silently asked Spencer permission when she grabbed the hem of the blondes shirt. Spencer nodded with a slight nervous smile, watching Ashley's face, her eyes, her smile, the way her nose crinkled in amusement, "Do you think she can hear us talk-" Ashley's mouth dropped a bit as she felt the baby kick against her hand, "Wow she's strong."

Spencer couldn't help but laugh, "Yeah well she is Aiden's kid." She said quietly but immediately regretted because silence filled in the room that was semi-awkward which was odd to both girls since they usually aren't ever caught in an awkward silence.

The older girl cleared her throat as she placed Spencer's shirt back down over her small pregnant bump, she watched the blonde, just studied her face, took in her older beauty. Spencer tilted her head at Ashley, "Do you remember that one night back when we were young kids when you got that scar? Your dad flipped." Spencer laughed as she raised her hand to her forehead where a small scar was exposed above her right eyebrow.

Both girls smiled back at the memory, "Yeah and how you freaked out?"

Ashley laughed, "I didn't freak out…" She replied back to the younger girl in a small voice. "Im not very good with blood I guess."

_It was spring of 1992, two years after Spencer and her family had moved to the city. It was one of the first times Ashley had stayed over at the Carlin's house, it was the time they had started to become close friends. The two girls, young, hyper, hyped up on sugar, they were invincible and had the world at their feet. _

_They had just finished a movie and were supposed to be in bed but they weren't even close to being tired so instead of laying down and attempting to sleep, Ashley proposed a good way to lose all the energy they had built up. _

_Tag._

_Arthur could hear the girls from upstairs giggling and screaming, they were having fun. He was about to go downstairs to tell them to settle down because it was nearing midnight and he had to get up early to go to the office to finish some paperwork but he continued to lay in bed, listening to his daughter's laughter that he hadn't heard in many years. He enjoyed the sound of her laugh because it meant that she was truly happy, that she wasn't hiding behind some mask that she put on for everyone who came into contact with her._

_Ashley was it and she chased Spencer around the bottom level of the house for about five or so minutes already and she was getting really tired of being the chaser so somehow she got the blonde to run into the living room where she was cornered. Spencer laughed, knowing Ashley's plan as she kept running. She looked behind her and stuck out her tongue at the older girl, "You'll never catch m-" To Ashley, it felt like slow motion._

_Ashley watched Spencer trip over one of Glen's shoe that he had left out from earlier in the day and she fell head first, hitting her head on the brick siding of the fireplace. Ashley froze in the spot she was before hand and continued to just stare at Spencer, "Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god," She said quickly, still standing in the same spot she was before it happened._

_Spencer slowly sat up and laughed lightly, "Ow," She continued to laugh but as she connected her eyes with Ashley's, panic slowly started to sink in as she felt something cold start to run down the side of her face. She slowly reached up and felt the blood, opening her mouth to say something but nothing coming out._

"_Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god," Ashley looked at Spencer in a horrified look, "I think im going to be sick." She covered her mouth as she turned around and ran for the downstairs bathroom._

"_Dad!" Spencer called out for her father, "Dad!" She called again within seconds and she heard the hurried footsteps above her make their way downstairs, "Daddy!" She watched Arthur turn the corner, his eyes widened at the sight and as soon as his strong arms were wrapped around her, the walls were down and the tears started to fall._

"_Ashley! Ashley honey, where are you?" Arthur called as he picked up his daughter in his arms, hearing the bathroom door swing open, "Come on Ashley, we've got to take Spencer to the ER." He pressed the towel against Spencer's forehead, "Sweetie im going to need you to apply pressure to it until we get there, okay?" He asked the young girl who nodded in return._

_Once at the emergency room, Ashley waited out in the waiting room for the Carlin's to finish up. After Arthur continued to ask and ask for Ashley to join them in the room that Spencer was laying in, waiting to get stitched up, Ashley still said no and continued to wait outside of the room. Hours had passed because the doctor wanted to run some tests to make sure there wasn't a skull fracture nor a mini concussion. But eventually, Arthur stepped outside of the room and sat down next to Ashley, taking her hand into his._

"_So Ashley," He started out, looking down at her, "She's going to be okay, you know that right?" He smiled lightly at the young girl, "But no more running in the house." He said sternly but still had that comforting tone in his voice. All Ashley could do was nod in return, never once looking up at Arthur, "Do you want to come see her? She' s just getting her jacket on and putting back on her shoes," He smiled down at the brunette who still looked like she was going to be sick to her stomach. "Come on," He tugged on the girls hand and led her into the hospital room where Spencer sat on the bed, tying her shoes._

_Spencer heard people walk into the room and she looked up from tying her shoes and turn her attention towards the doorway to see who entered the room. She smiled brightly over at Ashley and jumped off the bed, "Look!" She said excitedly, pointing towards her forehead, "I got 12 stitches!" Ashley looked at Spencer like she had just grew two more heads, "The doctor said that it's going to leave a scar but when I get older it'll shrink, but if I put some kind of oil on it, it'll disappear." She informed Ashley who still looked queasy, "But what's the fun in that! Im going to look so cool." She grabbed Ashley's hand and led her out of the room, "Come on Dad!"_

Both girls fell into a fit of laughter, "I still don't understand why you were so excited about having stitches in your head." Ashley shook her head at the memory they both just relived.

Spencer smiled brightly, "Hey, Paul Collins thought I was a total badass," She told Ashley in a matter-of-fact tone. "Plus, you were so freaked out and sick to your stomach you couldn't even come into the room. What was that about? You're the one who made me fall." She stuck out her tongue to the older girl who just laughed in return. Spencer held out her hands to Ashley who sat only a couple feet from her. The brunette gladly took Spencer's offer and was pulled closer to the blonde, "How are you ever going to watch your kid being born? That has so much blood in it," Spencer said quietly, raising her eye brows, the mood between the two girls suddenly much heavier.

"Um…" Ashley looked from Spencer's eyes down to her lips, they were mere inches away from one another, "I guess if I have a kid with the right person, maybe I'll be able to just stay up by their head…" She paused, noticing Spencer's eyes watching her lips move, "Then I won't have to see…" She paused again, "The blood," She trailed off as she leaned in towards Spencer, capturing her lips light and carefully.

The kiss didn't last very long before Spencer pulled away, "We need to talk about us you know…" Spencer said quietly, instantly missing Ashley's lips. "Wow," She breathed out and she opened her eyes, "I love kissing you," She said which caused Ashley to smile.

"I want to be with you, Spencer," Ashley spook quietly, still on her knees in front of Spencer, never once letting go of her hands, "I want to see this baby girl come into this fucked up world," Spencer laughed and dropped her head, shaking it, squeezing Ashley's hand, "Please Spencer… I've been in love with you practically ever since I met you. You can't say you haven't been either…" Ashley pleaded Spencer, letting go of her left hand and replaced it under Spencer's chin, lifting her entire head up, making Spencer look at her, "I know that I've messed up a lot, baby but please… please trust me when I tell you that I'd never leave your side again, I'd be a terrible mother but you could teach me how to be an amazing one like you," This made Spencer smile and tear up, "No one will ever love this baby more than me." Ashley placed a light kiss on Spencer's lips, "Besides you of course."

Spencer laughed again; she truly did love Ashley, "But Ash…" She looked into her brown eyes and was instantly lost for words. She looked deep into Ashley's soul before she shut her eyes, leaning her forehead against the one she loves the most forehead.

"I'll be finishing up my tour by the time the baby will be born, Spence… im through with this career after that." She felt Spencer shake her head, "Spencer pleas-" Ashley was then cut off by Spencer kissing her, she gladly returned the kiss but pulled away after a few moments, "I love you, Spencer Carlin."

Spencer pulled completely away from Ashley then, "But Ash… im not going to make you give up something you love, I couldn't live with the guilt."

"You are what I love, Spencer. By not letting me be apart of your life and this baby's life, that's making me give up something I love." She stared deep into Spencer's eyes, "I've never been so sure about anything in my life, but I know that im damn sure that I want to spend the rest of my life taking care of you and this baby girl." She squeezed the blondes hand for more reassurance, "If you don't believe me, if you don't want anything to do with you and this baby's life, if you don't love me then fine, I'll get up and walk out of this room right now. But I want to hear it from your mouth; I want to hear you say that you don't love me, that you don't think you could spend the rest of forever with me." Ashley watched Spencer carefully, scared of what she was going to say.

The younger girl continued to look at Ashley, tears pouring out of her eyes. She opened up her mouth but shut it quickly when the door flew open and in came the band members that had earlier interrupted their moment, "Ashley we need to leave now or else we won't make it to Atlanta on time."

"Get the fuck out," Ashley said, never once taking her eyes off of the girl in front of her.

Once the door was shut, Spencer opened her mouth once more, "How do I know that you really mean this, Ashley?"

Ashley sighed in frustration, she hung her head, and she was slowly getting defeated. She took a moment to gather her thoughts and looked back up at the girl she was so madly in love with, "Marry me, Spencer."

**Uh oh! Review and tell me your thoughts?**


	24. Chapter 24

**I lost a lot of reviews from the last chapter which was very shocking… keep up with reviewing so I know if im doing alright! **

Ashley sat on her tour bus, neither crying nor smiling. She had just walked away from the person she was so madly in love with; she barely put up a fight. She wasn't sure how to feel right now, how to react to the way Spencer reacted. She bit her lower lip and stared out of the window, watching the scene outside pass by her quickly. She only had a few more concerts left to do before she was finished with her first tour, possibly her last one. Ashley Davies loved the music business but it just wasn't for her like she thought it'd be, sure she had it in her blood and she has had a blast doing all of the concerts that were over done and over with. In her heart, she knew that she had made her father happy and really, that's all that mattered to her anymore with playing music.

In her hands, she held onto Spencer's necklace that she has worn since her 13th birthday. Ashley had given it to her as a matter of fact to show that she loved her and would always be there for her especially through her toughest times. On that birthday, Spencer's cat had died and it wasn't just any old cat, it was her mom's cat. Before Ashley had come over to the Carlin's house, she stopped at a jewelry store and bought a simple heart necklace and when she walked into the house, Spencer was no longer sad.

It not only meant a lot to the blonde, but it also meant a lot to the brunette as well. Even at such a young age, they always looked at one another with more than friendship, but it had taken them years to figure that out about the other. So whenever Spencer laughed when Ashley had asked such a serious question not even twenty minutes ago, she was madly confused.

There she sat in front of the love of her life, completely opened and vulnerable and Spencer laughs. Ashley replays the moment in her head for the millionth time since she had left, still unable to process what had happened;

_Ashley sighed in frustration, she hung her head, and she was slowly getting defeated. She took a moment to gather her thoughts and looked back up at the girl she was so madly in love with, "Marry me, Spencer."_

_The blonde looked at the girl in front of her and lightly laughed, hung her head and shook it, "Ash no," She looked back up to see the brown haired girl wearing a look of hurt on her face now. "Not that I don't love you Ashley," She paused to study the girl who was now standing up, she followed the actions, "But you can't settle down yet, you're way too busy to worry and take care of some pregnant chick." Spencer smiled light hearted and before Ashley could speak, Spencer held her hand up to stop her from saying anything, "Go and finish your tour, Ash. Make you dad proud," And she gave the brunette a light push towards the door. "I love you, call me as soon as you finish it, I'll be waiting." She leaned up and gave Ashley a light peck on the lips._

_Ashley looked at Spencer with complete confusion but didn't hesitate to kiss the girl once more before walking out of the hotel room. Spencer was going to be waiting for her once the tour was over, but in her heart, she felt like it wasn't going to be just her._

"Ashley? You okay?" The lead singer looked over at her bass guitarist, Brenda. "I know what it's like leaving the one you love behind," she shot her a sad smile, "But whenever you get to see her again, it's the best feeling in the entire world." Brenda sat down next to Ashley, placing her hand on the knee of the singer, "I can tell by the way you sing the songs about her that you wish that it was you next to her instead of that guy," Ashley had cried to Brenda many nights during the tour about Spencer, it wasn't shocking to no one that Brenda knew a lot about the blonde. Since she didn't have Kyla with her, she had no one else to turn too so the singer and her bass guitarist became close very fast.

A single tear fell down Ashley's cheek, "I just… she's having a baby in a couple of months…" Ashley looked up at Brenda who sat patiently waiting for her to continue, "I want to be there for her, I don't want that stupid looking cowboy to be," Ashley frowned at the older girl, "It should be me."

Grace walked into the hotel room with two coffees in her hands, "You ready to head back, Spencer?" She looked at the blonde girl who was laying up against the head board, her shirt raised up half way up her torso, her hand firmly on the pregnant belly, "What're you doing, girl?" Grace sat down on the edge of the bed, she studied Spencer as she zoned completely out. "Spencer?" The blonde looked over at the younger girl.

"She asked me to marry her and I laughed and said no." Grace's eyes bulged out of her head, or so it seemed like to Spencer who's laughing lightly now before explaining the entire story, "So yeah… here I am." She looked down at her exposed stomach, "She hasn't kicked since Ashley left."

Sad eyes found Grace's, "She's kicking!" She exclaimed, quickly setting down the coffees on the end table and placing both of her hands on either side of the blonde's stomach.

"Not since Ashley left," Spencer chuckled at the younger girl; she smiled lightly, "But shit, come on, im starving." She pulled her shirt back down and grabbed the extra coffee from the nightstand, the bag from by the door and the room key and both girls made their way back home.

Days had passed and not once did Ashley hear from Spencer, she wasn't the only one who was making little to no effort in the relationship either though because Ashley wasn't calling or texting the blonde either; both being too suborned for their own goods. Jacob noticed the change in Spencer since she had been back; she was more quiet and distant from mostly him. She focused on her school work mostly and hardly left her dorm room.

Jacob made his way up towards the blonde's dorm room, a bouquet of flowers in his hand. He smiled brightly, hoping this surprise would brighten Spencer's mood. As he turned the corner, he saw Annie and Corey standing outside of the door that belonged to Spencer. His smile fell, knowing the moment he wanted to create is now gone with her two closest friends knocking on the door. Corey turned first and noticed Jacob, he offered a small smile.

"Well hey there, Handsome," Corey's full attention was now on the cowboy, "I haven't seen you around before," He winked at Jacob who started to laugh nervously.

"Hey Corey," He turned to Annie, "Annie." They all exchanged small awkward smiles, "She not opening up or what?" He motioned towards the door that they were found standing in front of quietly.

Corey shook his head, "No, she's in there though," He nodded and looked back at Jacob, "She's been so different since she came back from that silly concert." He shook his head, "My girl needs me!" He turned and started to bang on the door which startled both Jacob and Annie with the sudden noise. Before Jacob could stop the younger guy, the door swung open and Spencer stood in the doorway in just an old pair of sweat pants, a dark blue hoodie, her glasses on and her hair a mess. It made Jacob's knees go weak as he took in the sight of her, "Sweetie, oh sweetie, you're alive!" Corey threw his hands around Spencer's neck and hugged her tightly.

Spencer never hugged Corey back, she just stood there, her cheeks were tear stained and you could defiantly tell that she hadn't been able to sleep in a couple of nights, "What's been bothering you, Spencer?" Annie decided to speak up, keeping her distant from the blonde.

"Nothing. What are yall doing here?" She avoided Jacob's gaze, she knew that she would collapsed into him for security.

"Is it Ashley?" Corey stood up straighter, "I swear I'll kick that diva's ass with her own hair extensions."

Spencer laughed lightly, "Corey, she doesn't wear hair extensions." She smiled lightly then, her hand finding her stomach and her eyes finding Jacob's. Her smile fell as her eyes landed on the flowers, "Where'd you get flowers when it's snowing outside?"

All eyes were on him then, "Uh… I have connections," He gave Spencer his best smile as he handed the flowers to her, placing a light kiss upon her cheek, "Can we talk, Spencer?" He pleaded her with his eyes and finally Spencer gave in, saying her goodbyes to her friends as well as promising that they'd all meet up later for some coffee.

Both Spencer and Jacob walked into her dorm room, she took her place back inside of her bed and Jacob followed, laying down next to her, pulling her into his arms and they just laid there quietly. Spencer didn't know why she felt so safe with the boy next to her, but she thought that it had to do with the fact that she knew he'd always be there for her. That he was madly in love with the blonde, but then why couldn't she have just said 'yes' to Ashley whenever she had asked her to marry her? She sighed deeply and rolled into Jacob more, taking in his scent. She loved Jacob, but she defiantly wasn't in love with him which bothered her because if she could just fall in love with the cowboy, everything would be so simple and she wouldn't have to worry about playing some stupid love game with the singer that held her heart in the palm of her hand.

"What'd you want to talk about?" Spencer asked quietly finally after a long period of silence. She enjoyed the silence but she could tell by how tense Jacob was that he really did need to talk to her.

She heard the cowboy sigh deeply, wrapping his arms around her tighter, "Well…" He started after slowly, "You just seem really distant from me ever since you and my sister came back from Ashley's concert. Gracie won't tell me anything that happened," He looked down at the blonde who still avoided his gaze, "What happened, Spencer?" He sat up, making Spencer sit up as well.

Spencer sat there quietly, not looking up from her comforter for a couple of minutes, "She asked me to marry her," She finally looked up to see the shock and hurt expression written all over Jacob's face, "I said no though…" Her gaze fell again to the comforter, "I haven't felt the baby kick since," Her voice caught as she wrapped her own arms around her stomach. "What if she's just as heartbroken as I am?" She looked up at Jacob then, giving him a chance to talk now.

"I don't think it's possible for a baby to get heartbroken," He smiled sadly, "But…" He trailed off, pulling Spencer back into his arms, "Im here for you Spence, I know you love her…" He revealed the last part quietly which made Spencer pull away and look at him, "Im not an idiot." He laughed lightly and ran his hand through his hair, "The way you look at her is completely different than me," He looked at the blonde in front of him sadly, wanting to reach back out to her. "But it's okay Spencer," He smiled then, it was forced and that bothered the young girl, "She's going to make an excellent mother by your side," He leaned and kissed her forehead before standing up and grabbing his coat from the back of the computer chair and putting it on.

He started to walk away and Spencer watched him, "What if…" Jacob stopped walking and turned to look at Spencer, "What if I don't want her by my side to raise the baby?" She looked up at Jacob, shocking herself with what she was saying as well as the cowboy.

"Then you're making a huge mistake, Spence." He chuckled and shook his head, "Ashley deserves you and you deserve her, yall complete each other." He gave her a sad smile and walked over to the blonde who was now crying, "Don't get me wrong, Spencer, I love you, I would love to be by your side and raise this baby girl with you, I'd marry you in a heartbeat if you would let me," He looked into Spencer eye's, raising his hands to the young girls face and wiped away the tears that were falling, "But we both know it wouldn't be fair if I couldn't ever have your heart which Ashley holds onto proudly,"

Spencer studied Jacob's face in her hands and pulled him down into a deep passionate kiss, "I love you too, Jake." She pulled away and smiled sadly at him, "But she doesn't even show me that she loves me," She frowned up at the boy, "I wish I wasn't pregnant, it'd make everything so much easier," She laughed, wiping the snot away with her sleeve of her hoodie.

They looked at one another silently, taking each other in as Spencer's phone started ringing, instantly knowing that it was Ashley calling, she gave Jacob an apologetic smile as she reached across her bed to grab her phone off of her nightstand, "Hey," She said answering it, laying on her back looking up at the ceiling.

"Hey yourself…" Ashley replied quietly, "I um… forgot what I called for," She laughed nervously making Spencer smile, "But it's good to know that you're smiling again, gorgeous."

"How'd you know I was smiling?" Spencer asked, her cheeks turning a deep shade of red before hearing her dorm room close and her smile fell, knowing that Jacob had just walked out on her without even saying goodbye.

"It's not there no more, were you busy?"

Spencer closed her eyes, "Not at all, sweetie, when are you coming home?"

**Alright my fellow readers, lets see you review to this drama filled chapter! What do you think Spencer is going to do? Choose between whom? Who's going to win this prego's heart!**


	25. Chapter 25

It's been a few weeks since Jacob had seen Spencer, had even checked up on her for that matter. She was getting to be close to her due date in another month or so and it was killing every part of him not to pick up the phone and dial her number. He knew that she'd appreciate it because he had been there for every doctor appointment and every other single thing that Spencer needed and now he wasn't there at all. He paid more attention to his own family, the holidays had come and gone, no one made a big deal which was okay with him. It was January and the baby was due in a month, it was all that was on Jacob's mind now-a-days.

There was still snow on the ground but the sun was beating down, slowly melting it away. The temperature was still in the low twenties, high tens but that didn't stop Jacob doing what he loved. He was in the garage, the garage door up, the hood of his 1965 Ford Mustang that he was re-building. It was his guilty pleasure that he loved. He had just repainted the entire thing black and a clear shiny coat to make it look even better. He had bought it for $500 and had already put more than a grand into it over the past couple of years. It was his baby, something that he cherished.

A cold wintery breeze blew in through the garage opening, making the boy shiver. He grabbed a towel that was already covered in grease and began to wipe his hands off, though it didn't make much difference. Jacob turned off the lights, shut the garage door and made his way back into his house where he found Grace and Spencer sitting at the kitchen counter talking, Spencer in tears. His heart stopped and his jaw clenched, he hated to see the blonde upset, it killed him inside and he wasn't ever good at hiding how he felt.

Jacob shut the door and both girls became quiet and looked over at the cowboy, waiting to see what his next move was. "What's wrong?" He asked, keeping his distance as he took off his coat and hung it up on the coat rack that was put up by the back door. He took off his John Deere trucker hat and set it on the counter as he waited for Spencer's answer.

The blonde shrugged, "Just hormones I guess," Spencer told the boy as tears continued to fall.

Grace and Jacob shared a look, he already knew that Spencer was lying but Grace confirmed it, "Spencer, please don't lie. Is it the baby? Is she okay?" He made his way over to the blonde, "Is it Ashley?" He looked her in the eyes, making Spencer cry more as she nodded. "Yes to which one, Spencer?" He wanted to keep his distance but the blonde was making it hard for him as he watched her cry in front of him. All he wanted to do was wrap her in his arms and comfort her but he knew he had to stick to his limits, he didn't want to make anything harder for Spencer and he defiantly didn't want to make anything harder for himself.

"I don't want to talk about it with you, Jake." Spencer looked at him though teary eyes. "I just don't want to complain to you about my problems with Ashley." She chuckled then, trying to regain her composure.

Jacob looked at his sister then, a silent conversation happening before the blondes' eyes, "Okay… I'll leave you girls alone then; im heading over to Carrie's house after I get out of the shower." Spencer smirked at the night she experienced with Carrie.

After Jacob had left the two girls alone, Spencer stepped outside and pulled her phone out of her back pocket, dialing a familiar number that she would always know by heart. It continued to ring, making the blonde become more impatient by each passing second but then he picked up, "Hey Spencer, you okay?" She heard Aiden reply like he was busy and really not in the mood to be talking to her.

"Yeah im alright, I just wanted to see how everything was doing?"

"And by everything, you're wondering if I've heard anything from Ashley?"

Spencer closed her eyes and hung her hand, playing with the snow that was still on the railing of the back porch, "Yeah…"

Aiden sighed into the phone; he had just finished dinner with Morgan, Spencer could hear her in the background but it didn't bother her one bit anymore, she was happy for him and her, "She hasn't talked to me in a few days but last I've heard from her… I don't know if I should be telling you this but…" Spencer's heart sank, she had no idea what to expect, "She's done with her music and she's doing her last concert tonight in LA."

"What!" Spencer exclaimed, "She can't be done with it, she loves singing and the entire atmosphere!"

"But she loves you more, Spence." Aiden replied calmly, it didn't affect him anymore like it used too. He too was happy for Spencer and Ashley, "I think you should call her, Spencer, wish her luck." Spencer nodded and they said their goodbyes and Spencer quickly dialed Ashley's number.

Whenever it stopped ringing, she heard a voice she didn't expect to hear, "Kyla?" Spencer laughed into the phone, "Wow, wasn't expecting this, how have you been?" She asked, trying to make small conversation with the girl.

"Oh shut up, I know why you called," Kyla laughed lightly, "You just missed her though, she's opening the concert up right now." Spencer sighed, "But if you'd like, I could try and catch her for you real quick, make her tell everyone it's a technical difficulty?" Kyla had always supported Ashley and Spencer's relationship; she didn't want her sister to be with anyone else but the blonde.

"No its okay, it's her last concert, it can't have any mistakes," Spencer smiled a small sad smile to nothing in particular, just to whatever was there to witness it, "Just when she goes on her break, can you do me a favor?"

"Of course, anything for my future sister-in-law." Kyla replied, making Spencer chuckle. It wasn't the first time Kyla had called the blonde that.

"Please give her a big hug for me and tell her good luck for me?" After Kyla agreed to do this favor for Spencer, they said their goodbyes and both girls went on their way.

Spencer made her way back to her dorm room after a little while and found Annie and Corey sitting on her bed, reading a Cosmo magazine. She came into the room and shut the door, catching their attention, "Spencey!" Corey exclaimed, looking up from an article about 'how to win the one you love over'. "How was Mr. Sexy?" He asked, referring to Jacob.

Sitting down in chair by the desk, Spencer sighed, pulling on her favorite hoodie, "He's okay I guess." She turned around and turned on her computer, Ashley's photo instantly coming up on the background and her hand finding her pregnant stomach, "She's kicking again," She said quietly, closing her eyes.

"What was that, Spencer?" Annie asked in a concern tone from behind her, never taking her eyes off of Ashley.

Spencer turned around and looked at her two friends, "She's kicking again, this is the first time she's kicked since I had last seen Ashley." She smiled at the two who were still lying on the blondes' bed. "I've be completely worried about it, but," Spencer looked back at her computer screen and looked at the girl who was smiling back at her, "She's kicking," She trailed off quietly, pulling up the album that had only photos of Ashley in and took the time to look at each individual one.

After some time had passed, Spencer ended up kicking both of her friends out. She continued to sit at her computer looking at the photos that she had taken of Ashley when she came across a photo of Ashley, Aiden, and herself on the first day of 7th grade. It made her laugh at how funny they looked and how much they had changed since then. How close they were then and now they weren't even close at all.

Whenever Spencer's phone started ringing is when she stopped looking at the photos of Ashley, never realizing how much time had actually passed by. She grabbed her phone from her nightstand and saw that it was Ashley, "Hey Ash," She said sweetly.

"Spencer hey," Ashley replied back but it sounded to Spencer as if she was struggling with something, "What're you doing right now?"

"I should be asking you the same question," Spencer said really curious to what the brunette was doing because she didn't hear a lot of screaming fans or music or anything at all in the background like she would normally hear after a concert. "But im changing into some sweat pants about to get into be-or well answer the door now," She said slightly aggravated because all she wanted to do was lie down and talk to Ashley.

"Well open the door and call me back," Ashley said hanging up the phone before Spencer could even argue with her.

Spencer groaned as she made her way to the door, opening it, "I swear Corey if you ask me another Cosmo question im going to be-Ashley!" Spencer looked at the brunette who had bags by her side, "What… what the hell?" She didn't move from her spot that she was standing, she was too dumbfounded.

"Surprise?" Ashley said with a bright smile, "You don't have to call me back, but if you want, you could come hug me?"

Spencer stood there smiling at the girl in front of her, so many questions in mind to ask but all she could do was take a step forward and bring Ashley's face in her hands and her lips to her own and kiss the brunette passionately. She pulled back slightly, "God Ash," Spencer said quietly, grabbing one of Ashley's free hands and placing it on her stomach, "She hasn't kicked since the last time," She gently kissed Ashley again and again before the brunette began walking forward, forcing Spencer to walk backwards towards the bed.

The two girls laid down, Spencer in Ashley's arms, "I missed you so much," Ashley confessed after a while before placing a kiss on the blondes head.

Spencer looked up at the brunette and placed a passionate kiss on Ashley's lips, "I've fucked up a lot already Ash," She shook her head at the brunette, "I've… been so back and fourth and you don't deserve any of it," Spencer continued, letting tears fill her eyes, "I miss you all the time, I feel guilty for never telling you how I felt freshmen year, I feel like everything that's happened is happening completely different than how it should have happened and I feel like I've cheated you for trying to replace you with someone else." By now the tears were falling freely out of Spencer's deep blue eyes, but she never once took them off of Ashley's.

"I love you, Spencer Carlin." Ashley leaned in and kissed Spencer gently who gladly returned the kiss. "Thank you, I really needed to hear that," She chuckled lightly to lighten the heavy mood that had set in.

"If I could Ash, I'd show you tonight how much you mean to me, how much I actually love you." Spencer confessed shyly, looking down at her hands that were tangled up with the older girls.

Ashley took her free hand and placed it underneath Spencer's chin, making the younger girl look at her, "I know you love me Spencer, you're not the only one who's messed up a lot in this relationship," Ashley looked at Spencer, taking her thumb and wiping away a tear that had escaped, "I'll always be here for you Spence and after this baby is born, im taking you on a trip okay? A trip for just us, to begin our life together okay? Because sweetie, I don't want you ever out of my life, im done trying to chase you around and make you my girl when we both know that's where you belong." Spencer smiled at the older girl, "I really meant it when I asked you to marry me, Spencer."

Spencer looked down at that comment, "I know im sorry I don't know what I was think-" But she was cut off by Ashley's lips, kissing her hard.

"Shut up, I'll make it completely special if you promise to give into me already and let me be the one who takes care of you?" Ashley pleaded with her big brown eyes.

The younger girl leaned in and kissed Ashley, "Was that your lame way of asking me to be your girlfriend?" Spencer smirked at the older girl, "Because if it was," She kissed the older girl again, "Then im giving in, baby." And both girls smiled into the kiss that they were sharing.


End file.
